Diamonds and Ice

Somehow, we pulled it off. The meeting with the mayor was a success and trading deals between the towns were signed. There was a moment during the luncheon hour when Liam had to excuse himself during a conversation. Right away, I knew what it meant and with great care, I followed him shortly after he left the room. But, that was it - a quick change of bandages and a shot of whiskey to numb the pain. After that, there was not a single mention of it. The paranoid man wouldn’t even let me go to the pharmacy to buy an over the counter pain medicine.

The entire ordeal wasn’t over till 7 o’clock in the evening. He don’t show it, but I know he’s in much pain. Once we made it back to our hotel my teeth could no longer hold my tongue.

“Liam, you need to stop being so stubborn and let me help you!”

“Shhhh!” he frowns at my display of emotion.

“Don’t you shush me!” in disbelief, my voice grows a pitch higher.

“Someone might hear you and get a wrong idea that something is wrong,” with no one around to put a show on for, his frown cuts deeper into his face.

“You’re in pain. I can tell the pharmacist that it’s for me.”

“No, I’m fine.” without a single second thought, he keeps declining.

“Argh!” my eyes roll and for a moment I think I see my brains.

“I am hungry though and bet you are too. Go pick up us some dinner.

“Liam. Sometimes, I just want to straggle you,” my tense arms reach for him, but I spare his life and squeeze the empty air instead.

“Wow,” he leans his head back a bit. “We’ve been back only five minutes and you’re already getting crazy ideas.”

“Liam!”

“I’m a gentleman. Wine and dine me first,” he teases.

“You’re impossible,” seeing that this conversation is getting nowhere, I grab his wallet and head out the door.

Before the door slams shut, he yells. “Get me steak!”

As I storm out, an order of side of wild rice and asparagus echoes down the hall.

Our carriage take me to a spot the lobby receptionist recommended and as I enter the dark winter air, my body freezes in place. Out of nowhere, a voice my heart once trusted pierces me through.

My eyes do not lie. It’s Mika. I bet my life his hunter friends are here too and now looking for clues. And he’s helping them. Trying to avoid him spotting me too, I quickly pull up my hood and draw my back to him. Still, the snake manages to sniff me out.

“Victoria!” I hear him slithering after me.

Hoping to beat the unwanted encounter, my boots pick up the pace towards the restaurant’s door.

“Victoria!” a hand on my shoulder stops my attempted escape.

I have no choice, but look at his deceitful face. “Hello, Mika.”

Unlike him, I do not share his enthusiasm.

“Hi! Oh boy, if I didn’t know better I might of thought you were trying to avoid me.” my lack of smile surprises him.

“I didn’t expect you to be here. How did you know it was me?” trying to stay calm, I decide to speak to him.

He takes my hands. “Your red mittens. I can spot you a mile away with them on, silly. How's your business trip so far?”

“It's fine and, oh yes. I almost forgot. You’re still the hunting type,” I pull away from his touch. My assertive rejection leaves to room for misinterpretation.

“Victoria, what’s wrong?”

With getting no pleasure from it, I see that I’ve wounded him as much as he wounded me.

“You lied to me, Mika. You made me a promise and then lied to me.” I look him in the eyes.

My glare overcomes him.

“Don’t ever speak to me again,” my eyes tremble at the sound of our friendship breaking.

“Victoria, please. I tried, but things are not that simple.” he tries to collect the pieces.

“Leave me alone!” I push him away.

“I wanted to tell you as soon as I saw you again. Please, give me the chance to explain.”

But I refuse to do any such thing. “Don’t speak to me again. Don’t even look in my direction again. Ever!”

“Victoria,” he chokes. “I’m sorry.”

“Not as sorry as I am. I trusted you. Good bye, Mika.” leaving him paralyzed, I rush into the restaurant.

He’s gone by the time I come out with the dinner order. Looking around with a big brown bag in hand, Mika is nowhere to be seen. All that’s left are our foot prints where we argued and a painful memory. Closing my eyes, I pray it stays there once it’s time to leave this town. The prayer is short and I climb back into the carriage to take me back to the hotel.

Before entering the room, I check my emotions in the hallway mirror. Liam doesn’t need to know. I'd rather eat an old leather shoe before I let anyone know of my tears.

“Dinner’s here.” I open the door.

“Thank you,” Liam sits in the same chair where I left him.

“I got your steak the way you like it - medium rare,” avoiding eye contact, I busy myself setting up the small table for two.

“Victoria?”

“Yes?” still, I pretend to be too busy to stop and talk.

“I'm sorry for giving you a hard time earlier," he tries to apologize.

"It's okay," but my guard is still up.

"No, it's not. I can’t imagine how hard this is for you and me being difficult like this isn’t helping you feel any easier. I know that, but I’m not doing this out of some sick pleasure. I wish I could feel better. I wish I could have you get me some pills. I wish I could go to the doctor and get myself out of you hair, but I can’t."

“It’s funny how every one is doing whatever they please around me, but I never know why. I don’t know what it is I did to deserve it,” I pause.

He doesn’t know it, but I’m in pain too. I’ve been in pain for so long, with no way to ease it or make it go away.

“You deserve only the best. That’s why I’m doing what I doing.”

“Oh really, you think that having me look at your bloody gunshot wound is doing me some kind of favor?” my bottled up anger starts to seep out.

“No, Victoria. The reason why is simple.”

“And what that might be, Liam?” I ask.

“I'm scared. I'm scared that you might get hurt. That some stupid slip up or mistake would get you hurt just so that I could feel better for a few hours. That’s why I have to be so careful.“

I stop in my tracks. No one has ever admitted this to me. No one has been so vulnerable in front of me like this. For a longest time all I felt so inferior and thought that I’m the only one who’s afraid all the time.

Stupid man. He’s being careless just saying those words. I’m done for and he has to know of his mistake.

Before I could give a second to analyze the consequence of my action, the punishment is already being carried out. Liam doesn’t resist. He participates. Like a sweet wine, his lips take it all in as I pour my heart out.

"Don't be scared," I pause, only to tell that he's safe with me.

"I'm not. I'm cured," he looks up at me as if I'm some kind of a goddess and could never deserve my divinity come down to his level.