Demon

Laura

Well, they’re gone. Yesterday they packed up the last load of stuff and took off to Ron’s house. I sigh. I wonder how long before they rent out the condo and we get new neighbors. New neighbors for the new year.

I don’t know why I am missing Brenda even more now. She hasn’t been here on weekends for months, and I did just see her yesterday. Well, we’ve set up a plan for dinner in a couple of days.

Timothy is in a bit of a funk, too. Not as much as I would have expected, though. He seems to understand better than I do that he’ll be able to continue to see his friend. They’re in the same class, after all, and he knows we’ll make sure to maintain their weekend playdates.

He is also happy with the big box of toy dinosaurs that Gabe gave him, going through them with a nostalgic smile on his face. It makes me laugh to think about it, all those years ago when he was just two and started playing with those dinosaurs with Brenda’s kids. That was the first thing that Natalie saw him do, when Timothy started shrieking about Gabe picking up a couple of the toys. Natalie was able to figure out how to comfort him, even though she was just two also. And they’ve been inseparable ever since.

There’s been a lot of changes since then, but not that. Timothy and Natalie are still like two peas in a pod, never tiring of each other’s company, constantly thinking of things to talk about. Performing their cute little experiments all the time.

Michael has never paid very much attention to that. He knows that Timothy and Natalie are friends, but he doesn’t understand their relationship. I’m not sure that anybody else does. They aren’t just kids who are friends. They are very unusual kids.

The fact that Timothy is already well into studying the college textbooks that I gave him for Christmas is typical for him, but baffling for Michael. I’m starting to wonder how much longer regular school is going to hold Timothy’s interest. He’s obviously academically far more advanced than second grade. The whole special ed testing and IEP process that started last year was enough of a challenge for us, and especially for Michael. I have hesitated to mention my concerns about whether Timothy might be better off in a higher grade level, or some other academic setting. I don’t want to rock the boat. So to speak. I laugh at my own pun, joking about not upsetting my Navy husband.

That’s another challenge. He isn’t just having a hard time sleeping now, he has gotten really jumpy. He went back to work after a couple of weeks of leave when his deployment ended, and since then when he’s home he is almost twitchy with anxiety. I have to be careful not to come up behind him too quietly because if he is startled he jumps a mile. It’s like he’s expecting a fight to break out at any moment. It’s alarming, and I don’t know how to deal with that either.

I keep mulling it over in my mind, all these issues tangled together, unable to find any solutions. Finding something to do with myself now that my best friend moved, my kid’s academic potential needing to be fulfilled, my husband’s stress needing to be managed. I have no idea what to do about any of it.

Stefanie

“Good morning, sweetie, time to get up.” He opens his eyes, but I get the feeling that he wasn’t actually sleeping.

“I know,” he says, somewhat glumly. I suppose it’s hard to get back to school after being off for so long. Extra long since he missed the week he got hurt, before Christmas break. He sits up, resigned.

I feel so much better about how he’s been the last few days. He seems to have gotten over that lethargy he experienced after the hospital. He’s not really back to himself, not as mischievous and challenging as he usually is. But maybe it’s just because he is maturing. I think that the events of last month might have given him a little incentive to behave better. It’s a good thing.

I stand back up from his bed, starting to feel a little off balance, now that the baby is growing and my body is expanding. I’ve already had to give up on wearing my normal clothes. I don’t have much by way of a maternity wardrobe, since I was still in high school last time and I don’t have any of that stuff any more. I’ve found myself wearing a lot of Brad’s big sweatshirts and stuff.

I need to get some clothes, though, since my internship starts in a couple of weeks. I’ll be working in a psychologist’s office, so I need something that will be suitable for that. I’m planning to drop Jonathan off at school and then head down to the mall to try to do some shopping.

The morning passes quickly. He eats breakfast, and has time to play with his dog before we have to go. I made sure to get him up plenty early to have time for everything without feeling rushed. He seems slightly on edge, like he is worried about something, presumably just anxious about being back at school again. Before long, we are in the car headed to school.

I start to pull up to the place on the street where I usually drop him off. He says, “Mom?”

“Yeah?”

“Um, can you walk me in? Please? Just today?” There’s a slight quaver in his voice.

Oh, that’s different. Man, he hasn’t wanted me to walk him in for years, probably since he was in kindergarten. What on earth? Then I realize. Last time he was here, he was carted off in an ambulance. That’s enough to make anyone anxious. Poor thing.

“Of course, kiddo, let me just pull the car around and park.”

We get out, and I walk close enough that he can hold my hand if he wants. I want to reassure him, but I don’t want to embarrass him, so I won’t grab his hand in public. But it turns out I don’t need to. He has a whole little welcoming committee waiting for him.

He lights up when he sees not just his friend Gabe, but also Natalie and even her friend Timothy, standing at the front of the school, obviously there specifically to welcome Jonathan. Aww, that’s so nice of them. Sometimes kids can be sweet.

They rush over and meet us before we even get out of the parking lot. “Hey Jon,” Gabe says, “welcome back to school!” Natalie reaches out and takes his hand, which is very cute. Even Timothy says hello to him.

I sense him immediately relax. He looks up at me. “Thanks Mom. Bye. I’ll see you after school.”

Well then I guess I’ve done my part. I lean over to kiss the top of his head. “Have a good day sweetie. I’ll see you after school.”

Gabe

I think we are going to head over to the jungle gym where Jonathan and I always spend every morning before school, but Natalie catches my eye and shakes her head. Oh. She must have heard that from Angel, and she thinks that we shouldn’t return to the scene of the crime, so to speak. Probably good to avoid it. And Jonathan doesn’t make any moves to go over there. I don’t know if it’s because he doesn’t remember that it has always been our spot, or if he just wants to avoid being where we both got hurt.

So instead we walk over to the edge of the playground, next to the fence overlooking the canyon behind the school. Natalie doesn’t let go of Jonathan’s hand the whole time.

“How are you feeling?” she asks him.

“Okay, I guess.”

“I know that you are getting even better every day,” she tells him. “I think that you’ll be fine in class. Then we can all eat lunch together, all right?”

Jonathan

Timothy and Gabe watch us, while Natalie is holding my hand and talking. I suppose Timothy is here too just because he is always with her.

Natalie glances over to the side. “Timothy knows about guardian angels,” she says, looking back at me. “He’s going to help you too. We are all here for you.”

I don’t remember Timothy wanting to hang around with me before, and thought he didn’t really like me. But since there’s a lot I don’t remember maybe I just don’t have that right.

“Okay, thanks.”

Timothy looks at the watch he’s wearing. “It’s five minutes until the bell rings,” he says.

“All right,” Natalie tells me, “we can all walk you to class, okay?”

“Thank you,” I tell her.

I’ve been super freaked out about the idea of my guardian angel coming back and trying to control me. It’s scary. I don’t like how anxious I’ve been feeling. On the other hand, this is the most of anything that I have felt since I got hurt, and it’s almost nice to have a strong sense of anything.

Natalie assuring me that she is going to help, that they are all going to stay with me as much as they can, makes me feel a lot better. I can almost believe that everything is going to be all right, when she’s holding my hand and looking into my eyes.

I like it when she does that. Looks into my eyes. Her eyes are the prettiest color of dark green, and they seem full of light and friendship. Especially outside, in the sun, I love to see them.

We get to my classroom before I know it. Everyone is running around and talking about what they got for Christmas. But Natalie and Gabe and Timothy are just standing with me, quietly. She’s not holding my hand any more, since I think she doesn’t want everyone in my class to make fun of me about it, but she’s standing right next to me so that our arms are touching. It’s enough.

“Okay, Jonathan, we have to go to class. Have a good morning. We’ll see you at lunch.” She touches my hand one more time before they head away.

It’s okay. I’m okay. I go in.

Timothy’s

My beloved is extraordinary. Despite the years of torment at the hands of this boy, Timothy is committed to doing everything that he can to help. Of course, it is founded on his devotion to the Seer. But he also wishes to see the success of the Jonathan Project. He believes that if the project succeeds, Natalie’s preferred outcome might actually come to fruition. She strives for both the restoration of Jonathan’s Guardian, and a decision by the boy to control his own choices. Preferably, kinder choices. If this is able to occur, Timothy feels, he can continue in his close friendship with Natalie despite her determination to spend as much time as possible in Jonathan’s company. It is an uneasy alliance, and a struggle for Timothy to control his anxiety about spending more time with other children, particularly with the one child who he for so long sought to avoid.

But he is resigned. Furthermore, of course, he feels the insatiable scientific curiosity about what he views as an experiment. The data he is gathering adds to his understanding of myself and the other Guardians. Our communication continues to strengthen. Every night before he falls asleep, he is able to hear my words of love, and we find it possible to carry on a very brief conversation before he drifts off. Just a few words. It is necessarily fleeting because in order for this to happen, he must be very close to sleep. The rest of the time, he habitually opens his mind to me, and nearly continuously feels my presence, senses my support and companionship.

When he first first began his efforts to communicate with me, his initial motivation was a hope that this would assist him in understanding the topics that he studies. His experimentation has expanded from this original purpose, but he has never forgotten it. Now, I sense that there is progress in that direction. As he studies his textbooks, clearly at an academic level far above that which he is prepared for, I attempt to transmit to him a sense of deep focus, and I believe it is assisting. It is difficult to know to what extent his learning is enhanced. His naturally brilliant intelligence would have led the way to great academic achievement, even if he had not begun his experimentation in Guardian communication. But I believe that his learning is augmented by his ability to receive my support.

He focuses today on the experiment. Natalie is receiving frequent updates from Angel regarding Jonathan’s experiences. His first day back to school seems positive. He, as well as Gabe, are experiencing the minor celebrity that comes with being the victims of a dramatic accident. The entire school was aware of their injuries, and engaged in intense speculation regarding their fates after they witnessed the spectacle of an ambulance on the school grounds.

Gabe accepts the attention good naturedly if abashedly, allowing his classmates to try using his crutches, and to sign their names on his cast. Jonathan, on the other hand, is basking in the attention. He finds himself surprised to be enjoying anything this much, after his month of muted emotions. Natalie is very pleased to receive Angel’s reports indicating that all appears to be proceeding very well.

Timothy

At lunchtime, I take the chance to write some notes about the updates Natalie has been giving me about Jonathan. It’s strange to be sitting together and eating with him. Every time he’s come over to me at lunch before, it ended up in some disaster, with him teasing me or hurting me or fighting with me. Not today though. He’s just sitting there, talking about how all the kids in his class were asking questions about the ambulance and the hospital, and how he had to make stuff up to tell them since he barely remembers anything. Natalie is sitting next to him, and I am on her other side eating and writing in my notebook about the Jonathan Project.

Angel says that his soul is getting better all the time, but Demon is still missing. So the experiment is unfolding just fine. Jonathan seems a lot better than he did at first, and he doesn’t show any signs of trying to be mean to me or anyone else.

Let’s hope it keeps up.