Chapter Daydream: Epilogue
Three Months Later
“THIS REALLY FEELS LIKE A can I copy your homework if I change it a bit moment. I have serious concerns that the contents of that letter are exactly the same as the contents of my letter.”
Cami smiles in a way that tells me I’m absolutely right. “Has anyone ever told you you worry too much?”
“Yes, everyone, all the time. Pete’s going to think we’re bullying him if we both quit on the same day,” I say. “Maybe we should space it out.”
“Maybe Pete deserves to be bullied a little after he upgraded that woman who called you the bitch in the cardigan,” she says, applying her lipstick clearly without a care in the world. “Have you considered that?”
I’m feeling a little sensitive when it comes to quitting on people. Sure, Pete has made me want to burn down the hotel on more than one occasion, but he isn’t a bad guy. “You quit. I’ll wait a week,” I say.
“Halle Jacobs, we are quitting this shitty job and moving on to greener pastures. Those pastures being wine and books. Come on, let’s rip the Band-Aid off together.”
Climbing out of my car in the parking lot of The Huntington, Cami and I find Pete in his office and deliver what I imagine are identically worded letters after Cami asked to look at mine for “inspiration.” By the time we’re heading back to the car, unemployed with no notice period after Pete told us to never come back, I’m in agreement that maybe he deserved to be bullied a little.
Enchanted bookstore is thriving. So much so that Inayah needed to take on someone to help during the week. She asked me if I wanted the position before she advertised it to the general public. After being heavily influenced by all my friends, I said yes.
Tired of being verbally abused and hit on by snotty rich businessmen, sometimes in the same conversation, Cami decided that if I was jumping so was she. That jump happened to land in the wine bar next door.
I feel lighter now that I’ve lost some of the responsibilities that don’t make me happy, and every time I put myself first, Henry treats me like I just saved the world. I kind of like that bit the most.
“I DON’T THINK IT’S NORMAL for you all to be this invested in something that doesn’t have anything to do with you.”
“Henry,” I mutter, refreshing the competition portal for what must be the millionth time in the past hour. “Don’t be mean.”
I look up from my screen at all the people watching with interest. The front door flies open and Russ and Aurora stumble through it wearing T-shirts with giant raccoons on them. “Did we miss it? We got stuck in traffic!”
“What are you wearing?” Henry asks, looking them both up and down.
“We’re looking after the raccoon group this year,” Russ explains, pulling at his Honey Acres summer camp T-shirt before closing the door behind them. He sits in the chair across from us and Aurora sits on the arm of it.
“Jenna is punishing us for lying last year by putting us with our last choice of age group. Teenagers are literally so mean; what is their problem?”
“You didn’t miss it,” I say, refreshing my screen again.
“There weren’t this many people in the room when I got drafted,” Grayson says, looking around at my friends.
“Halle, Bobby just texted me and asked when you become a famous author, will you go on their podcast?” Robbie says, looking up from his phone.
My eyebrows pinch together. “Their… hockey podcast?”
He types back, then nods. “Yeah. They’re thinking of transitioning into books.”
“Sure,” I say, nodding slowly. “When I’m a famous author tell them just to let me know when to show up.”
Henry leans in, his mouth millimeters from my ear, voice low. “Refresh it again.”
“Hey!” Grayson snaps from the recliner on the opposite side of the room. “Get back onto your own seat cushion.”
“Finally,” JJ says, reclining the seat next to my brother. “Some code of conduct in this house. It’s been a lawless land for years.”
“Shut up, Jaiden,” Emilia says. “You’d break any code of conduct for fun.”
“You don’t even live here anymore,” Aurora adds. “You have no authority here.”
“You’ve never lived here! Oh, I just gave myself déjà vu. Have we had this argument before?” he says. “Has someone else had this argument before?”
He thinks about it for a minute, looking at the other guys for them to weigh in. “Probably.”
I’m about to tell the guys to shut up as well until I notice the warmth leave me as Henry shuffles away to his own designated cushion. “You can’t be serious,” I groan.
“He’s huge, Halle. He looks like he doesn’t think fighting is for fools anymore. I love you, but I also like having all my ribs intact, which is going to be my main focus when we play football tomorrow.”
Grayson is in town for a meeting with a prospective team now that his contract is up. He’s been trying to visit more before the season starts to ramp up, and he’s back at training camp, whichever team that ends up being on. He says it’s because he misses me, but in reality, he heard I have a new boyfriend and he wants to check him out. He thinks he’s a good judge of character since he was the “OG Will hater.”
So far, he has no complaint about Henry other than he stands too close to me and he’s too affectionate.
“What if they actually hated my entry and it was so bad that they don’t know how to tell me?”
It’s the one thing that silences the room. Everyone looks at each other for someone else to answer.
“You got through to the final ten,” Henry says, my forever voice of reason. “You’re catastrophizing.”
Cami taught Henry what catastrophizing was recently, and now he loves to point out when everyone else is blowing things slightly out of proportion. The irony is that she was explaining what it was to him because he was talking about how his natural response to conflict is to spiral.
“If it hasn’t updated when I refresh one more time, I’m throwing my laptop out of the window,” I say, silently seething. “They told me it would definitely be today.”
“Maybe the system is just updating,” Aurora adds. “Maybe their building got evacuated.”
“Maybe Halle is just impatient,” Henry says, causing every person in the room to stare at him. “Fine. Maybe we’re all a little impatient sometimes. No big deal.”
I click the refresh button one more time, and unlike all the other times, the screen turns white. “Something’s happening! Something’s happening!”
About ten people all jump onto our couch to get a look at my laptop screen. It’s a ridiculous attempt to show support, and I know it’s because Henry reminded them all to be supportive, but it makes my heart feel warm all the same.
The white screen lasts a lifetime.
Henry would tell me I’m exaggerating, but it feels like a lifetime.
The portal updates. The tiny box next to my entry that’s read Pending since I found out I’d been short-listed a week ago has changed to Runner Up.
“Oh, I didn’t win. That’s okay; I wasn’t expecting to anyway.”
“Oh, Hals,” Aurora says, and I feel someone’s hand—maybe hers, maybe someone else from the pile of people surrounding me—pat my head softly like I’m a dog.
“You can’t be hot and immediately successful,” Cami says. “It’ll make you too powerful. All hot people need to struggle first to make them likable.”
“She’s right, Hals,” Poppy says somewhere among the pile. “You need humble origins so you can say you never saw it coming.”
“Okay! You can all go back to your seats now. I’m over it. It’s okay. It was a long shot and I still wrote a book, so…”
“Hallebear, can I talk to you outside?” Grayson says after being unusually quiet for the last two minutes. “You, too, lover boy.”
“He can’t ground us, right?” Henry asks as we follow Grayson into the garden.
“No, babe. He can’t ground us.” Grayson stops on the deck, putting his hands on his hips. “Can you not? You look like Dad right now, and you’re freaking me out.”
“Shut up. I’m sorry about your competition,” is how he starts. “Anyway, I feel bad about low-key traumatizing you by calling you the family manager since you could talk, so, I spoke to Mom and Dad, and we agreed that if you didn’t win the competition that we were going to pay for you to go on the course.”
“Shut up! You’re kidding.” Henry doesn’t say anything beside me, and I immediately panic that it’s because I’ll be gone for six weeks. We barely lasted a month not seeing each other, but this will be different and he can visit. “Are you sure? Thank you, Gray.”
“Mmm. So, Mom and Dad don’t know yet, but I’m moving to the West Coast. I don’t know exactly which team right now, but I have offers on the table. My apartment lease isn’t up so you can stay there while you go to class or whatever.” He looks to Henry then back to me. “But I have cameras watching your every move, so no funny business. I’ll know if my couch has been interfered with in any inappropriate way. And I’ll be back at some point. You promise you’ll look after her? The city is not for the weak.”
“Why are you such a dinosaur? And I ca—wait, what?”
“I’m coming with you,” Henry says calmly, like it isn’t the most exciting thing I’ve heard all year. “I signed up for some summer art classes that looked cool.”
“I”—would scream with excitement if it wouldn’t make Henry banish me—“am so happy right now.”
Russ appears at the French doors; he knocks before poking his head out, his raccoon T-shirt nowhere to be seen. “Sorry to interrupt, guys. We really need to go or we’ll be late.”
“Two minutes,” Henry says to him.
I hug my brother and he reluctantly hugs me back like the pretend grump that he is. “Thank you, Grayson. Are you going to come to the party later? It’s an open bar.”
“No, Hals. Have fun with your friends. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He points to Henry. “No driving if you’re drinking. Got it?”
“I don’t even have a car,” Henry says back.
“Good. Let’s keep it that way.”
As we walk back into the house, Henry looks at me. “I’m not going. I need to practice sprinting so I can get away from your brother.”
“Yes you are, c’mon.”
“I LOVE WHAT YOU’RE WEARING,” Henry says to me loudly. “You look so beautiful.”
About five people I don’t know turn around and look at me with a mix of jealousy and appreciation. “Shhh,” I say, laughing. “But thank you.”
He leans in closer, nuzzling beneath my ear. “You’re welcome.”
“Can you two cool it?” Jaiden snaps. “Some of us are single and honestly don’t appreciate this kind of treatment.” He looks along the line of couples. “Never mind.”
I try to cool myself with the paper fan I was given when we walked onto the hotel terrace. It was more gratefully received than the spritzy fruit drink they handed me.
“They’re coming!” Aurora yells, followed by an apology when Henry asks if yelling was necessary.
A round of applause starts as the patio doors to the terrace open and Stassie, Lola, Mattie, Bobby, and Kris walk through in their graduation cap and gowns.
“Christ, that was long,” Bobby groans, making a beeline for an ice bucket filled with beer bottles.
“Not doing that again,” Mattie adds.
“That’s what she said,” Kris yells, following them closely toward the beer. “Both times.”
“Will you three ever mature? Like, genuine question,” Stassie says, putting her cap on the table. I can see the Long Story Short, I Graduated design we did together with a hot-glue gun and too much supervision from Henry stood the test of the day.
“No. Probably not,” Robbie says as he appears with Nate.
More friends and family start to arrive, and the terrace fills up quickly. I keep myself stuck to Henry’s side so I can run interference when it gets a bit too much for him. He said he has a face that parents like to talk to, and he needs me to make that stop.
Nate organized the event for everyone because he wanted to celebrate Anastasia and she said it was obnoxious to do it alone and to make it a group party. People moving on from college and starting new journeys is going to be a weird adjustment for me after making so many new friends this year. Henry promised it wouldn’t be the end, and that he can almost guarantee that we won’t be able to shake anyone. I cut him off when he started weighing the pros and cons of streamlining our friendship group anyway.
“Can we skip our graduation?” Henry asks. “I don’t think I can do this amount of socializing two years in a row.”
“At least finish your classes before you start trying to ditch your graduation, bro.”
We both look to the person talking and I have no idea who it is. Henry hugs him immediately, something I don’t see him do a lot with anyone other than me and his parents.
“Connecticut fucked your hair up,” Henry says as he lets the man go. “You should move back to LA.”
Then I realize the guy is Joe. “That’s the plan. Give me another couple of years to survive law school, then I’ll be back. Tell Damon I miss him, and I’ll never cheat on him again I swear.” They both laugh and look at me. “You must be Halle. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“I’ve heard a lot about your dates with Henry.” He bursts out laughing. “It’s really nice to meet you.”
We chat about New York and promise that we’ll all hang out when Henry and I are there next month. We talk about books, since Joe is a big reader, and when someone yells for a speech, he tries to convince Henry they’re talking to him.
Nate stands at the top of the patio steps and fake-bows when someone wolf whistles at him. “Thank you, Colin, Stassie’s dad, for that warm welcome.” The crowd laughs and Henry wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer and kissing my temple. “I won’t make this a long speech because I know everyone is eager to celebrate, and at some point, one of you will start booing me.
“I’m so proud to be here to celebrate all our friendship group has achieved. My best friend of far too long, Robert Hamlet, is the newest UCMH faculty member, and the owner of a shiny new master’s in athletic coaching. Lola’s heading back east to try to take over Broadway and continue her lifelong mission to be the scariest person in New York City. Mattie and Bobby are continuing their hockey careers…”
“God, he loves the sound of his own voice, doesn’t he?” JJ says, coming up behind us and making me jump. “He didn’t make a speech about me when I graduated.”
Henry’s eyebrow quirks. “He didn’t make any speeches. You guys got really drunk and performed the Mamma Mia! soundtrack on the karaoke all night.”
“Oh yeah,” JJ says, sipping his beer. “Did anyone bring karaoke?”
Nate is still talking as JJ and Henry chatter behind me. “Kris is going to med school, which terrifies me, and should also terrify the rest of you.”
“How many more people do we know? Surely it’s nearly over,” Henry says, looking at his watch.
“Shhhhhh,” I hiss, silencing them both.
“And my beautiful Anastasia: I love you so much, baby. I am so proud of you and everything you’ve accomplished this year. You’ve worked so hard…”
“When can I start the booing?” Joe says, looking over his shoulder at Henry and JJ for guidance.
“Surely it’s soon,” JJ says.
“And I’m going to wrap it up there, folks. Enjoy the drinks, enjoy the music and the food. I’m so happy we get to celebrate here together tonight.”
Everyone claps and cheers; Henry’s arm leaves my shoulders, his hand slips into mine and tightens. “Do you want to go for a walk?” I ask, kissing his cheek.
“Yeah.”
We ignore Jaiden’s interrogation as we walk down the steps to a lower area of the outdoor hotel space. After walking for a couple of minutes hand in hand, we find a bench beneath a floral arch. I rest my head on his shoulder as we listen to the sound of a fountain running somewhere behind us.
“What are you thinking about?” I ask Henry, kissing the back of his hand.
“That we should get Joy a harness so she can come to places with us.”
“I love you,” I say, meaning every single syllable with my entire heart. “And how much you love my cat makes me love you even more.”
“I love you, too, Cap.”
“More than you love Joy?”
He grins wickedly, wrapping his arm around me to pull me in for a kiss. His hand travels down my back until it reaches my waist. He uses his grip on me to maneuver me onto his knee. “I was raised not to tell lies.”
When I try to wrestle him off me so I can run away, he clings to me a bit tighter, laughing hard. “Fighting is for fools, Halle, and you’re not a fool.”
“We need a new rule book,” I declare, wrapping my arms around his neck. “You’re out of control without guidelines. Rule book entry number one: stop using that ridiculous saying against me.”
His lips pull into a straight line as he shakes his head. “Sorry, the board said no.”
“The board is biased, I fear.”
“That might be true. They never punished me for all the times I thought about you naked.”
My jaw drops. “That wasn’t even a rule! It was that you weren’t allowed to bring it up!”
“Oh, my bad.” Henry kisses my shoulder, and in the distance, I can hear the start of a song that is almost definitely from Mamma Mia!
“Thank you for being on my team, Henry.”
“Thank you for giving me the love I could never picture.”
I take his face in my hands, kissing him deeply with every ounce of my love for him. “And how does it make you feel? Now that you can picture it?”
He’s quiet while he thinks. “Like I’m living in my daydreams. So, pretty damn happy.”