Darkness

May 21, 1812

Homochitto

Moses

I catch a few hours of sleep, but am awake long before dawn. I am filled with the excitement and wonder and astonishment that this week has brought to me. I leave my little garden shed long before the last stars have left the sky, to go back to the cabin site.

In the gray light of early dawn, I pace around the building, the new little cabin that will be our home. It has taken shape so quickly that I can scarcely believe that this is real. It seems more likely that I am simply dreaming.

However, as I run my hand over the fine new lumber, and the sturdy brick walls that were just erected yesterday and are still setting, I know that it is true. I don’t know how, but it is really happening.

Well, that isn’t really right. I do know how. Gregor. Without him, not one part of this would be possible. If I hadn’t gotten a job as his houseman, I would never have met Dalila. If not for him, Stephen would never have hired me. If not for him, this cabin would not be nearly completed already.

And because of him, because of everything he has done for me, I am going to be able to get married far sooner than I could have imagined. There is no reason to wait, once the cabin is done, and that should be by the end of the week. Which means that before another week goes by, Dalila and I will be married, and will be able to call this our home.

She has not seen it yet. I asked her if she would mind waiting until after we are married. She gave me a gentle smile and agreed. She knows that Gregor is helping to build us a cabin to live in, separate from the slave cabin area, but she has no idea how fine our home is going to be. And I have it in my mind that I want to surprise her with it, to be able to have her see our home for the first time as my wife.

I enter the structure itself and gaze around, in the growing light which is just barely bright enough to come in through the open windows and cast some illumination within. Today should see the primary construction completed. Two or three dozen experienced men working together can make very quick work of a project like this. By the end of the day, I expect those window holes will be filled with glass, the interior walls will be completed, and the finishing work will begin. Tomorrow will be the fourth day of construction, and I had not really believed Gregor’s assurance that it will be complete by then, but I see now that he was correct. By tomorrow we will be moving in the items of furniture that are waiting, and putting everything away in the house. It will be sparse, but there will be a bed for Dalila and I, a bed for Ayola in her little room, a table for the kitchen next to the small cast iron wood burning stove, a few cabinets and shelves, a couple of chairs for the parlor.

It will belong to the plantation, of course, but it will be our home. We will be able to call it our own.

I am so moved that I become emotional, and lean against the wall where the kitchen stove will be, and allow myself a few minutes to let my feelings engulf me. My joy, my anticipation, my gratitude.

By the time the sun has fully risen, and I start to hear wagons approaching, I have wiped my eyes, gotten a smile on my face, and go out to greet the men.

Margaret

Dalila keeps looking towards the door, as though expecting Moses to come in with news of the cabin. We all know what is happening down by the overseer’s house, on the parcel of land that Stephen approved for the cabin, but we have not gone down to see it. I am very curious, but I have decided not to go view the property. Stephen invited me to come with him this morning, but I have decided to wait. Dalila is not going to see her new home until after they are married, and I am going to honor that, and wait with her.

Hester comes into the parlor with a tray, to serve my mid-morning tea. Dalila can barely sit still, and Ayola keeps jumping up to go look out the window, so I decide that there is no point in trying to keep working on our stitching. My baby’s layette is growing, as we have been working quite diligently on preparing all of the clothes, diapers, blankets, and gowns that will be needed for a newborn. We can take a few hours off before we get back to it. Just a couple more months, Stephen thinks, before we will welcome our child.

When Hester puts the tray on the table, I tell her, “Sit down, Hester, why don’t we all have a chat?”

She is surprised, I suppose, but all she says is, “Of course,” and after she hands me a cup of tea, she sits on a chair next to Dalila.

“Dalila,” I say, “I think we should probably make some arrangements for your wedding. We've talked about it before, but I think we need to finalize the details. Hester, can you help us with some planning?”

Hester smiles. “I would like to do that.”

Before we can get started, Stephen comes in the front door. I get up, more clumsily than I used to, hefting myself up out of my chair. “Darling,” I greet him with a smile, and he comes to me, takes my hands, and kisses both of my cheeks. Before he gets the chance to close himself up in his study, I say, “Can you sit for a moment? I’d like to hear about the cabin.” I look over at Dalila with a little smile. “And I’m sure I’m not the only one.”

“All right, my dear,” he says, and hands me back down into my seat, before taking a place next to me.

“How is the construction going?” I ask. Dalila, and even Ayola, look like they are paying careful attention. It is natural, this is to be their home.

“I can hardly believe how fast Gregor’s crew works,” Stephen says. “They’ve only been at it two and a half days, and the structure is already mostly complete. He says he expects to be finished by the end of the day tomorrow.”

I meet Dalila’s eyes, which have grown huge. I’m not sure she really believed that this was happening.

“My goodness!” I say. “When will it be ready to be lived in?”

“I imagine within another three or four days,” he says. “I asked Moses when he plans to have the wedding, and he said that Dalila should decide.”

All of us turn our eyes to Dalila, and she looks petrified. “When would you like to have the ceremony?” I ask her.

“Ceremony?” she says, her soft voice and lovely accent making the word sound exotic. “I do not really understand what this is.”

Hester speaks up, unusually in the presence of her master. “It is the ritual to mark your marriage to Moses,” she explains to the younger woman.

Dalila nods, but says, “I do not know.” She looks helpless, and suddenly it occurs to me that she might not be at all familiar with wedding traditions. I know she came here on one of the boats across the Atlantic, and she had to have been quite young when that happened.

“Have you ever seen a wedding?” I ask her. “A marriage ceremony?”

She shakes her head and looks down. “I remember only one, long ago, back in my village. When I was a child.”

Oh my. We’ve been talking about holding a wedding for her, and she has no concept of what we even mean by that.

“If you’ll excuse me, darling,” Stephen says, “I must attend to some things in my study.” He stands, takes my hand and kisses it, then flees the room. I fondly smile after him. No man wishes to be present when women are planning a wedding.

“Well,” I say, “I think we have to do some planning.” It occurs to me that Dalila’s traditions might be very different from those here in Mississippi. “Can you tell us about the wedding you saw as a child?” I ask her.

Softly, she says, “I do not remember very much. There was a feast, and much happiness.”

Hester asks, “Do you recall what the bride was wearing? The woman who was getting married?”

Dalila gets a distant look on her face, and says, “Only that she had a cord wrapped around her waist, and I think that I remember it was then used to bind their hands together.”

Oh, now we’re getting somewhere. “Would you like to do that for your wedding? So you have something that feels like home for you?”

Tears brush her lashes, and she says, “Yes, thank you.”

Hester chimes in with, “And you should jump the broom. That’s what I did.”

I turn to Hester, surprised. “You were married?”

She nods, but then shrugs sadly. “For a time. I was sold not long after.”

Dalila looks at her with sad eyes. “You were sold away from your husband?”

Hester nods, and sighs. Ayola is looking back and forth between us, seeming to soak in the conversation, but I wonder how much the baby can really be understanding.

I look at Dalila, who appears suddenly frightened, as though realizing that she could be separated from her husband. It is a fact of life, that a slave might be sold, and although I know this to be true, it seems very hard. And something that I would never allow to happen to my maid, who is also my dearest friend.

I reach over and take her hand. “Dalila, you don’t need to be afraid of that. I will never let that happen. I promise you, as long as I live, you will never be sold away from Moses.”

She nods, and quickly reaches up to wipe her eyes. When she speaks, it sounds like she is deliberately forcing her voice to be calm. She turns back to Hester and says, “What does it mean to jump the broom?”

Hester smiles. “It is just the way that slaves get married. They lay a broom down on the ground, and jump over it together, and once they land on the other side they are man and wife.”

Dalila nods, and says, “Yes, we can do that too, if you think we should.”

“What about a preacher?” I ask her. “Most people have a man from the church perform the ceremony.”

She shrugs. “Do we have to do it in the church? Can we not have the ceremony here? In the garden? In my village the wedding was under the sky, with the trees and wind and air all around.”

I smile. “Of course. We’ll do it however you like. Now.” I look at Hester, who has been my co-conspirator in a little surprise. “We’ve started putting together a wedding dress for you. Would you like to see it?”

Ayola looks at her mother with a big smile. I bet that she’s seen Hester working on the dress, and knows about this as well.

The child glances up at me, and gives a cute little giggle.