Dangerous, Diabolical

Willow snaked her arms around my neck and his attention snapped between the two of us. “Another hour, hang in there, ’kay hun?” Even sober her voice slurred with the weight of the magic and her skin was bark rough.

“No rush,” I murmured to keep the conversation between the two of us. “Tonight just got a lot more fun.” Willow followed my gaze.

“He’s cute.” She whistled with a purr in the back of her throat.

“He’s council.”

“I’m out.” She tapped the bar in dismissal. “Seriously, he’s the one you’re spending all this time with?”

I almost choked on my drink. “No!” I spat out a little too quickly. “That’s the other one.”

She studied him from head to toe. “You should ask them if they would like an evening stroll in the woods.” And with a wink, she went back to work. Grahame instantly replaced her to stand next to me.

Goddamn vampire speed.

“Well, hello to you too.”

“How do you know this fae creature? Why are you here? Where is Leof…” he trailed off as a small fairy landed on the bar. Only about as tall as my hand, at first glance, he could have passed for an oversized butterfly. “This is a human bar!” He snapped at the fairy, who almost slid off the wet counter in shock.

“It was a human bar.” I corrected as the guy flew off. Pointing a finger at Grahame I caught him up to speed. “And I’m waiting for my friend to finish her shift.”

I held my glass out for another drink, and Grahame, covered the top, shaking his head at the bartender.

“I do not believe for a second your presence here is a coincidence.”

Swishing the glass from underneath him, I gestured for a top-up. “I’m here all the time, unlike you. Maybe Todd here can tell us which one of us is more credible.” I smiled at Todd who was topping up my glass. He merely smiled, showing several pointed teeth, far too many to fit in one mouth, and considerably magic-drunk himself.

“Sorry sir, Celandine and I are well aquatinted.” He replied, pushing a second glass to the vampire and filling it. The vampire said nothing, did not take the glass and sat ramrod straight in his chair.

By the time the hour was winding down, I’d resulted in keeping busy by playing top or bottom, which went like so; as each patron was checked by my sensitive nose for a hint of the mage, and deemed safe, I took a moment to ponder. Would I eat them head first, or feet first?

The current one was a bit of a starer, watching the girl on stage like a hawk. Yeah, the head had to go first on that one. Would just be uncomfortable to look at if you had to make the way up from the feet. A rather plump man walked past. Middle on him, I’d make an exception.

Willow sauntered up, between me and a silent Grahame, pulling her coat around her.

“Come, Andy. I long to be sturdy in my forest.” She tilted her head curiously at the vampire, but when he offered no introductions, she decided to ignore him. Obliging, I downed my last glass of wine, following her out. Grahame remained seated, but I had no doubts he’d be following us.

Markus, the bouncer, gave me a cheeky smile in passing. Bemused, I gave him a return wink as the door closed. The fresh dawn sunrise greeted us and I was reminded that I’d left my coat back at the store. Despite my growing lethargy I attempted to push a bit of warmth through my limbs, my head swimming angrily in response. This was the first time in a few years that I was beginning to feel well and truly tapped out.

“Where is everybody?” Willow asked. Having been too busy trying to draw magic I’d failed to check the surroundings.

I inhaled.

Rot.

“Willow, go get Markus.” And after a pause I added, “And the councilman.” She didn’t need to be told twice, backtracking her steps, I listened to her move away by the clinking of retreating heels on the tarmac to the club.

Standing alone in the stillness of dawn, the promise of a new day delivered coordinated figures from the shadowed alcoves. The creatures that emerged, resembling the lycanthrope girl, shuffling akin to broken marionette puppets. Counting seven of them, I withdrew efficiently against the closest wall, strategically positioning my back to avoid anything unexpected from behind.

Apart from two wolves in the ravages of decomposition, the other figures remained humanoids but in different states of corruption.

They all appeared wonderfully disgusting, but most prominently was the furthest afar. At over two metres tall, it was impossible to miss. Dragging elongated arms - flesh peeling to reveal rotten holes, and stumbling footsteps leaving decomposing puddles - beyond a doubt, I questioned my ability to overpower it.

This time, I double-checked to ensure they weren’t escorted by the robed figure before letting my attention focus. Even if the Spell-Caster was nearby, he was well hidden. Not even a draft of magic littered the air.

The first wolf pounced. Deciding I didn’t want to risk another round of rabies shots when its teeth closed to latch my arm I’d already pushed out my scales. Its teeth snapped on the thickened hide with a crunch, allowing me to easily fling its body to the side with a jolt.

A mere annoyance.

The second assailant was as easily dealt with, but this time, I pushed my strength further; after already discovering the quickest way to obstruct them from moving was squishing, I put as much force as possible. The pavement shattered on the wolf’s impact. It would not be getting up again.

“Damn, Andy!” Markus came up behind me whistling in appreciation.

“Rabies!” I exclaimed in explanation. He looked at the corpse. “Zombies!” I added as he still seemed confused, but that was enough to spring him into action. His other self exploded out. Mass doubling in size, shirt and blazer rupturing open. With rapt amazement, I noticed he was wearing stretchy cotton trousers under his suit. His lower jaw jutted out, teeth erupting.

Now they were some sharp teeth. Slyly I felt my cheeks raising, this was going to work well to my advantage. Who knew he was hiding that?

“Whoop!” I jumped up and down as he grew. His skin thickened, taking on a green hue, the white of his eyes shifting black.

He punched the tall figure first, which seemed to have grown even larger during my preoccupation with the wolves. Whilst Marcus didn’t quite stand as tall, his shortened arms were faster than the creatures that were reaching to grab him. “Go, Markus!” I cheered as his opponent stumbled backwards.

And then I got hit with a fireball.

One from the group had drawn close. He had no eyes, mouth stuck open in an endless scream. Each hand was missing digits but still manipulated the air into heating fire. My new clothes now harboured tiny fires that I patted out halfheartedly.

Grahame made his entrance.

Markus whistled appreciatively as the vamp exploded through the fire-wielding opponent in front of me with a squelch. He paused to scowl at me, holding the two arms at arm’s length, not a speck of rotten flesh on him.

Behind me, I heard the crunching of metal as Markus hoisted a car. It flew overhead, smashing into another attacker. The car alarm activated angrily.

“Bullseye!” I complimented him. It took me a moment to realise that his shaking was laughing, his voice had become so deep he now operated at a rumble.

“Need a hand?” He asked Grahame, pointing at the extra limbs he’d acquired. The vamp dropped them and sped off to the other side of the car park,

I couldn’t hide my grin. Markus was the new coolest person I knew, sorry Grahame.

Rot wafted over the wind. “Behind!” I shouted. The remaining humanoid and the first wolf I’d injured came close and started buffeting him with magical waves and bites. He staggered, the wolf’s broken teeth having little effect on his stony hide. Ripping free the closest tree, he used it as a bat to catch both figures and send them flying in a puff of twigs.

With both gentlemen handling the corpses I decided it was time to make my retreat.

“Willow?” I called, looking for her. She was nowhere to be seen. Where was she? Immediate panic set in, the rush of adrenaline flooding as I tried to recall if I’d seen her leave after going back into Members Only.

Without another thought I ran into the club, the bitter smell of rot had already seeped into the surfaces. A scream cut into the room.

“Willow!” I cried, shooting through the club towards her.

Furniture was in disarray, and she was huddled against the corner, her coat shredded. The figure before her raised its arm, almost double the size of its transformed human body. Like the lycanthrope from the store, now dead, its reanimated body didn’t seem to process magical energy correctly. Its transformation was a mess, the spine not fitting back into the smaller body and jutting out. Bowels hadn’t sealed back into the flesh and trailed behind, its legs mismatched sizes threw an uneven gait.

I wouldn’t get there in time.

Pulling air in, filling my lungs, I roared.

Glass burst, the ground trembled, and Willow clutched at her ears trying to back further away. The ground began to crack and the rotting figure stumbled, finally moving its hand away from threatening the fae girl. Leaping across the room, I smashed a foot into its back, grabbing the top of its spine sinews.

Like the wolves, I’d expected the body to slam into the ground, so when my leg went straight through the body, we fell awkwardly together.

Squealing, I tried to dislodge myself, immediately detecting the crawling maggots investigating the new supply. “Gross!” The empty sockets fixed on me, and magic around it shimmered, arms rapidly growing larger in preparation to squish me. Gritting teeth, I pulled at its spine, snapping it with a crack and attempting to squirm my leg free.

With a last wrench, and defining squelch my leg escaped. I liked rolling in body parts, but not with maggots keeping me company. The living corpse seemed to recognise that I wasn’t going to keep still, this time lunging towards Willow.

“Oh no you don’t!” Pushing magic into my hands, they ignited, charring the bones I held. Launching it like a javelin, it held the shape long enough to lodge through the thing’s cheek and distract it enough for me to envelope its waist with both my arms, pushing the fire through my joints.

“Willow! Tree!” She didn’t need to be told twice, her back erupting, vines tangling and knotting to form a large mass. Roots grew into the tiles, distorting the ground. She grew so large that she began to run knitting vines along the ceiling, her branches dropping to fill the club. Her skin became bark as she partly melted into the tree until she appeared as nothing more than a carving.

Focused on the flesh in my arms, I pushed even more heat through the rotting meat. The smell of burning meat was accompanied by the sour pungency of off-meat. Combined with the dregs of my magic reserve my head erupted into a dagger of a headache.

The skin began to slide off of its bones, the fire scorching the floor and singeing some of Willows leaves. The creature gave one last growl, fading away into the crackling of flames until only embers were left.

Job done, the tree around me rustled in appreciation. I patted a branch. ”I’m going to see what’s going on outside. Stay tree until it’s safe, okay?” Since she was a tree, I didn’t get an answer but I took it as an affirmative when the branches moved away from the cindering pile of corpse on the floor.

Gloop was layered thickly to my leg, running down over my foot as I walked.

Gross.

To top it off, Markus was back to his boring form, albeit shirtless. That was one plus, even if he was smaller. Grahame was photographing the remaining bodies.

“All good?” I asked.

He grinned at me. “I haven’t smashed anything for a long time.” He flexed his arm.

“My hero!” I fake swooned.

“Babe, any chick that can smash through concrete is my hero.” Damn straight. Markus knew brilliance when he saw it. “However, this is gonna be a nightmare to explain to the club’s insurance.”

“You realise that guy is from the SPCC right?” I pointed to the vampire. “I’m sure as part of the covering story they can help you sort something plausible.”

He quirked an eyebrow. “You know the SPCC?”

“Yeah, that guy’s name is Grahame. Also, if you can take the hit for literally everything that happened here, I’ll owe you.”

“You mean take the credit for personally destroying six zombies?” He smirked.

“Wait until you see the seventh inside.” I let a little tooth into my smile, testing the waters.

“I’m expecting great things.” He called from over his shoulder as he was already leaving to investigate.

“Hey!” I called after him. “Willows a tree in there, will you keep her company?”

“A tree?” He was visibly confused. “Wait, where are you going?”

“Bed.”

* * *