Collided: Chapter 30
I never pegged myself as a thoughtful guy. At least not until Sophie, where we dance on the fine line between friendship and more, never fully submitting to the idea of lovers. With my past and her future, there’s no point in thinking about anything but the next two weeks.
Despite telling myself that, I can’t help but wonder what it would be like after the season. The idea of returning back to my empty Monaco apartment fills me with sorrow. For some reason, after all these months spending time with her, I don’t want her to go.
Is it selfish of me to want her to stay when I’m not willing to commit to a relationship? Of course. So I bottle up my bubbling anxiety and put it on a shelf, instead choosing to make her final item memorable. The last thing on her list—the very one that reminds me of her—took some planning. I spent hours researching because Sophie rubs off on me in more than one way.
I rented an off-roading truck yesterday to prepare for our trip tonight. She has no idea what I planned, thinking I’m taking her to dinner in Abu Dhabi. Sophie seemed distant this week so I wanted to cheer her up. She barely hung around me, choosing to spend time with Maya and her dad instead of me. Every time I asked her if anything was wrong, she shrugged me off, claiming she wants to spend time with everyone before she leaves.
I can’t help wondering if she doesn’t want to share her nervousness about what will happen after the season ends. I plan on spilling everything to her once the race finishes on Sunday because McCoy promised a final offer by then, with them agreeing to rethink the Bandini clause at my insistence.
Her playlist of songs fills the silence. I let her choose the music, hoping it would boost her mood. The closer we get to our destination, the giddier she gets as she returns to her usual self.
Her smile eases the tightness I’ve felt in my chest all week.
“Are you planning on burying me out in the desert? Creative, I’ll give you that,” she sasses me. Grumpy Sophie no longer seems like an issue.
“I considered it, but everyone knows where I’m taking you. So, although effective, I’d be the primary suspect.”
“Everyone, huh?” She tilts her head at me.
“Just our friends.”
Somewhere along the way, our separate groups of friends merged into one. Santi hangs out with Jax on his own because I’ve been busy with Sophie. Maya and Noah officially came out as a couple, leaving Sophie to myself this evening.
She hums along to the music as I take us to the spot I researched. The moment I park the truck, she bounds out of the car. I kill the headlights and hop out, shrouding us in darkness, the sky on full display.
“No freaking way.” She runs a few feet ahead of me.
I walk up to her and wrap my arms around her as I look up at the bright Milky Way, courtesy of the Al Quaa desert. She listed have outdoor sex, and I hope I delivered.
Silence surrounds us—not a single animal or person around, the cool air brushing against our joined bodies. Sophie’s skin breaks out in goosebumps and I squeeze her closer.
She gasps. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything this amazing.”
I have.
We both stare up at the starry sky. I unwrap myself from her after a few minutes to grab the supplies. Thanks to Maya, I packed enough food to hold us over until tomorrow, along with basic camping necessities. I pull out a telescope I bought and set up a padded blanket with a couple of pillows. A tiny lantern lights up our makeshift bed.
“When I wrote that item, I would’ve never ever thought this up. I’m impressed because this is straight out of a storybook. Thank you.” She pulls me in for a hug.
My arms instinctively wrap around her and tug her flush against me. I love the instantly recognizable smell of her, summertime and ocean waves wrapped up in one. “I’d buy you the whole damn night sky if I could.”
Sophie laughs into my chest before she disentangles herself and lies down on a pillow. I busy myself with setting up the telescope.
She watches me, her eyes following every move I make. “Did you ever hear back from McCoy or any other teams?”
My hand stills on a lever, her question catching me unprepared. “Yeah, but I’m still waiting. You know, just in case.”
“So, McCoy offered an extension?” Her eyes shift from me toward the sky.
“Yup. Them and a few others.”
She pauses before speaking again. “What’s the holdup?”
“Contract deals are complicated. As smart as we both are, I leave that side of the business to my agent.”
Her bouncing leg freezes. “If you had a gun to your head and you had to choose a team for next year, out of all the teams except Bandini because they can’t offer anyone a seat, who would you choose?”
My heart races in my chest. I run my tongue across my lips, buying time to think up a response.
“Stop thinking and go with your heart,” her hoarse voice whispers.
“McCoy. I like the team and Jax, plus Peter finally chilled out,” I blurt out.
Her eyes slide from mine to the sky again. “Even with Claudia causing drama?”
I can’t tell if her voice sounds sad or annoyed. “She’s like Day of the Dead, coming out once a year to wreak havoc, only to return back to the fiery pit she came from.”
Sophie laughs, but the sound isn’t the same as usual, coming off forced.
I fumble with the telescope. “But there’s still time. Other teams can offer deals until the end of the season, and I haven’t made up my mind. You know things can be contingent on the final Championship standings.”
“Yeah, maybe something happens.” She lifts off the blanket, abandoning the conversation and grabbing my extended hand. Thank fuck. My breathing slows down again.
Her blonde hair glows from the lantern as she bends down and stares into the telescope. “Whoa. Just wow. I don’t have adjectives for this. You have to see this.”
I feel the same about her half the time. “I interpreted outdoor sex as spending a night under a starlit sky. I hope you like it.”
“You exceeded my expectations. As per usual.” She offers me a sweet smile.
“Do I get a kiss for my good efforts? Well, to be honest, I’ll take a kiss or a blowjob. Who am I to discriminate?”
She lets out the softest laugh that I want to record. “We can negotiate a deal of our own.” Her lips find mine in the dark. I tug her close, loving the feel of her pressed against me—a high worse than any drug.
Her soft lips kiss mine and her tongue teases my bottom lip. She invades my mouth like she does my life—unforgiving and unapologetic. Not that I want her to be. Shit, being with her brings out parts of me that I never knew were there to begin with. Her tongue caresses mine, our warm breath mingling together, an erotic feeling I don’t want to let go of. I crave everything with her.
I want to steal her kisses, leaving her mindless and numb, the only thought playing in her head is of me fucking her until stars dance behind her eyes. With her, I want to kiss and suck at her skin until I leave bruises so no fucker comes near what’s mine.
Mine? Shit. More like mine for the season.
My brain shuts off when her teeth graze my bottom lip and her hand cups my dick. I push Sophie into the blanket and crawl over her, the warmth of my body protecting us from the chilly desert breeze. Our lips never move away from each other. The hunger between us burns strong, fueled by our indisputable chemistry.
Her hands find the hem of my hoodie and she tugs it over my head. She traces the ridges of muscle from my shoulders to my stomach before removing my belt and chucking it to the side. I follow suit, removing her sweater and jeans. Not caring for anything between us, I make quick work of her bra and panties, along with my own jeans and boxer briefs.
I hate barriers as much as I hate the way she looks at me with lust and something else I can’t place. Something about it is off. It’s a look she hasn’t given me before, so I have no way to gauge what’s happening with her. Her glassy eyes find mine, the bright stars reflecting off them, calling out to me like a lost man finding his way home.
My fingers skim her pussy, finding her ready for me. She pants when I pump two fingers into her, bringing her to the brink of pleasure, kissing her to combat the swirling emotions inside of me. The very ones that creep in the night, tugging at my composure and challenging my rules. This is the very reason I set expectations in the first place. With my life on the road and my past rearing its ugly head time and time again, I don’t have the capability of doing more.
Do I?
Like Sophie senses my mind drifting as I kiss her, she pulls me back, her fingers lightly scratching against my back.
“You want to be fucked under the sky?” My words come out mumbled between kisses.
Sophie bobs her head up and down. My lips trail kisses down her neck before I pull one of her nipples into my mouth. She lets out a gasp as my tongue darts out and licks her, sucking the hard tip. Her moans encourage me. I leave a path of lazy kisses across her chest toward her other breast, paying special attention to her.
Everything with her feels so fucking right all the time. Somehow being with Sophie became as essential as eating and sleeping, and that thought alone makes my chest constrict.
She’s my star in the dark sky, shining bright and guiding me back from the shadows. But unfortunately, the Prix lights will shut down in a few days, casting us in a cloudy night with no light in sight. Because in the end, us together is like a stormy evening—starless, dark, and destructive.
“I need you right now,” her voice croaks.
A stupid man would ignore those words and continue on. I release her from my torture, lining myself at her entrance as I push away the negative thoughts clouding our moment.
“Wait. Condom.” She pushes her hand against my chest.
I don’t know why the request bothers me. Last week she was all for going bareback, but she’s been distant ever since Brazil. Adding a condom to the mix feels like another way she wants to pull away from me. But I can’t figure her out, let alone argue with her reasoning for wanting protection. Instead of complaining, I should be thankful because other women would use me during a moment of weakness.
I busy myself with a condom from my wallet, pushing away my uncertainty. Then I return to her. In one move, I bury myself to the hilt inside of her. Her legs wrap around me, her nails running down my back while I smother her cries with my lips. My dick throbs at the pressure of filling her. My eyes close while my body stills, wanting to enjoy the moment.
I regret shitting on the missionary position because with Sophie, it’s unreal. Sex with her never feels vanilla or boring. Quite the opposite, always pulling everything out of me, no matter the position. Anything with Sophie feels right.
Control wavers as I move inside of her. She switches between staring at me and the starlit sky, enthralled with us both. I shift my position and brush my dick up against her sensitive spot. Her body shakes at the new sensation, her arms wrapping around my neck as she tugs my lips toward her. My dick continues to pump into her, enjoying how desperate she grows to find her release.
“Fuck yeah, babe. God. It never feels like enough with you. I want you every fucking day, and I don’t know what to do about it.” My hand palms her breast.
Her body bucks under my torture, unable to handle the different feelings. And I’m right there with her. My brain can’t make sense of the emotions running through me. A blend of affection and unrestrained desire.
Sophie climaxes, erupting around my dick while making the best sounds. I slow my movements and milk her orgasm. Her eyes open and a lazy smile crosses her face before she kisses me tenderly.
“You don’t know how sexy you are. And you’re all mine.” I bite on my lip.
Something flashes in her eyes before she closes them, her hands tugging at my hair again. I don’t need her words because her body tells me everything.
I shift my position to give myself a better angle. My release is imminent, needing a shove before I topple over the edge. Sophie sighs as I increase my pressure and speed. Her body takes every powerful stroke while my lips suck on the skin at the hollow of her neck, obsessing over marking her in more ways than one. There’s no use controlling the wave of possessiveness running through me.
Cries and groans fill the silence of the empty desert, our heavy breathing providing the best soundtrack.
“Oh my…Liam…” Her sultry voice runs against my skin, the heat of her combatting the cold air around us. Sophie’s not one for false moans and words to boost my ego. She keeps it simple and sweet—just like her.
A warmth creeps up my spine as I come, my dick pulsing inside of Sophie while I continue to slowly pump over and over again. It’s a mind and body fuck all at once.
I collapse on top of her. My lips leave soft kisses on her neck in a silent apology, the dark spots already forming, evidence of our night together. “I apologize in advance for the hickeys.”
Her throaty laugh brushes off my comment. I pull out of her slowly, disconnecting our bodies, both of us sighing at the loss. My lips find hers again and leave a lingering kiss before I grab a blanket from the corner of our makeshift bed.
“You spoil me.” She runs a hand across the soft quilt.
“Take advantage of me. You won’t hear me complaining.”
She sighs as she finds her preferred spot against my chest, her body hugging mine while one of my legs wraps around hers.
Sophie hasn’t spoken much today. I don’t know what to make of her silence—a rarity for her. I push away a seed of doubt about Sophie leaving next week, about where we stand as friends once the season finishes. About what will happen with McCoy and what I’ll do without her by my side next year.
I drift off to the rhythm of her breathing and her fingers brushing across the bare skin of my chest. I’ll face my problems tomorrow.