Chomp

The restaurant was packed so tightly there was steam in the windows. As Agnes and I pushed the stiff door open, the savoury smell of cooked and uncooked meats seduced my nose.

For a fluke, it was going to be a fantastic choice.

“Two please,” I told the hostess at the stand.

She cast a glance over her left shoulder, then her right. “It’s going to be a while, maybe about twenty minutes. Do you mind waiting at the bar?”

“Sure, anything to get away from the crowd,” Agnes answered for me. Her cheeks were rosy, despite having been in the restaurant for only a minute.

We followed the hostess to the bar and raised stools, dodging every which way between the tiny tables with the built-in barbecues. As we sat, she handed us a drink menu before speeding off to the front again; my heart raced, happy that she had misread my age for once.

“Damnit—non-alcoholic beverages only,” Agnes hissed, sliding the drink menu my way. “And holy hell—it’s sweltering in here. Are you not dying?” She unbuttoned the tight black pullover and practically ripped it off. The shirt she had on underneath was just a plain ribbed tank-top—or maybe it was because it was ribbed—but she seemed to fill it a little too well. Her necklace that had a pentacle charm on it hung in a way that lead the eyes downward, right to her full, perfect—

I averted my eyes and unzipped my hoodie. “I-I-I think it will cool down once people s-start heading out,” I replied, shifting uncomfortably. “I think we got here late enough that it should be soon… You know… miss the dinner rush…”

Agnes mustn’t have noticed my gaze; she merely nodded and stared out at the other people in the restaurant. Her blue eyes scanned the crowd, then suddenly stopped.

Whipping her head back into a forward position, she elbowed me in the side.

“Ow!”

“Oh shut up, you have lots of ribs.”

“But—”

“Look, here’s your first lesson with vampire hunting. You ready?”

I stared at her incredulously as she tilted her head just the slightest to lock eyes with me. When did I sign up for that, exactly?

“I—uh—”

“Someone in here is a vampire,” she breathed. “I want you to guess who. And soon.”

The urgency in her voice was alarming. I looked around at the other customers, trying my best to figure out what had caught her eye. Being a vampire wasn’t a visual thing; it was like saying someone looked left-handed without the person actually holding something. Nevertheless, my eyes jumped from a muscular man in a plaid shirt, a middle-aged mother complaining to the manager, and a teenager ignoring her grandpa by texting on her cellphone. Nothing even remotely stuck out.

Turning back to Agnes, I shrugged. “I give up. Who?”

She smirked, staring off to my left. Nodding in that direction, she replied, “Take a look over there at that woman. The one with the bright red lipstick.”

It took me a second to see who she meant, but my eyes finally found her. The woman had sleek black hair that fell around a rather narrow face and hit her mid-torso. Her bright red lipstick matched the tight cocktail dress she wore, despite the clear casual atmosphere. Other than being well-dressed, I couldn’t discern what characteristics Agnes had absorbed from looking at her that might scream ‘vampire.’

Not until she started sniffing around, anyway.

It was subtle at first, a small tilt of the head so her nostrils could pick up the scent. But as one waiter kept passing her by, she would almost lean into the smell, closing her eyes and taking in the scent like the piece of meat he was.

Whoever she was, her sense of smell wasn’t as good as mine. The tattooed Korean waiter was a mere three feet from her and at least twenty meters from me, yet I could smell his sharp brown-sugar cologne from where I was without moving.

“Do you see it?” Agnes asked, whispering softly in my ear. Her breath sent shivers down my spine.

I nodded slightly. “I… I think so.”

“I hate to cut our little date here short, but I have a responsibility and duty to these people. If she goes, I’m following.”

I wasn’t sure which made me stutter harder—the fact that she was set on killing this innocent woman, or the fact that she had called this a date. Regardless, I choked on my words for what felt like a full, agonizing two minutes. “W-W-What?! Why are—this isn’t a—what are you going to do, exactly?”

The look of concern and alarm I received from her made me feel even more embarrassed; she clearly thought I was having some sort of stroke. But she recovered quickly, jumping down from her barstool and snatching her cardigan from the back of it.

“What do you think I’m going to do?” she asked, cocking an eyebrow. “Besides, I’m obviously not going to do it here. But like I said, if she leaves—”

“Let me come with you,” I blurted, jumping down from my own stool. My heart was pounding in my ears.

Agnes studied my face with pursed lips and a crinkled nose, making her freckles seem closer together. “Fine,” she sighed, still studying me. “But if we’re out there, you listen to me exactly. I don’t want to be responsible for some weird lanky kid who slips on a banana peel trying to throw a net over a vampire.”

“You’re trying to catch one? I thought—”

“That depends,” Agnes retorted. She placed her hands on her hips and tilted her head dramatically to the side to look past me at the vampire. “If she’s hard to deal with, I’ll have to kill her. But if she’s easy, I’ll study her before I do it.”

The pit in my stomach clenched, and I felt like I might be sick. The vampire had such a poor sense of smell; she was probably recently turned. And if that was the case…

I nodded firmly. “Okay,” I replied quickly. “I’ll let you handle it, and listen to whatever you have to say. I’ll be the quiet observer until I’m ready.”

Agnes looked back at me, her expression a little difficult to read. A small smile appeared on her painted black lips, and her eyes seemed to sparkle dangerously. “Alright, that’s what I’m talking about.”

“N-Now can we please sit down? That woman’s food hasn’t even gotten to the table yet, so I doubt she’s leaving any time soon. We look… We look kind of weird just standing here.”

It was a rather good idea, if I did say so myself.

The woman waited until the restaurant started to close before taking her leave. By that time, we had already been assigned a table and barbecued our own steak, pork, chicken, and shrimp. I tried to keep my share as rare as possible without raising suspicion; thankfully, Agnes’ attention was centralized on the woman.

“She’s getting up!” she finally hissed. It was almost ten, and only three tables were occupied.

I glanced up at her as I finished with the handheld debit machine. Her eyes were almost electrified as she stared past me. The woman sat behind me, so I couldn’t see what she was doing, but the sound of a chair being pushed across the floor was obvious enough for anyone to understand. High heels clacked against the tile floor, prompting Agnes to put her cardigan back on.

Ripping the customer receipt out from the machine just as she stood, I took a deep, calming breath.

This was it.

Agnes stopped at the glass entry doors a few seconds after the woman had departed. She bounced her head and mouthed something, her eyes closed.

“Are you… praying?” I asked hesitantly. Not that there was a visual characteristic to it, but she never struck me as the religious type.

Her eyes snapped open, only to glare at me. “Please,” she hissed. “I’m counting, thank you very much. Only rookies make the mistake of following too closely.”

My mind flew back to when she had followed me on my way to school. Maybe she was used to stalking a different kind of vampire—maybe ones that had been deaf and nose-blind before they were turned.

Finally, she pushed the door open and made a hard left. The cool air was a relief to my skin and senses, and I breathed it in as quietly as I could. I followed closely behind, fully aware of how silly we must have looked crouching behind a newspaper stand.

But there we were.

Agnes pulled what looked like a knife from what I had taken for a decorative garter belt. The switchblade looked like any other; maybe perfect for being cornered by a lame street thug who wants nothing more than five dollars, but I doubted it would do much harm against our target.

“She went down the alley,” she whispered, glancing through the darkness. I could only see as far as the turn would allow, but it was unclear how much Agnes saw in the poor lighting. “On my mark, we head down there. Whatever you do, stay behind me—got it?”

I nodded as curtly as I could muster without giving my intentions away. Who was I trying to kid, though? I didn’t even know what my own intentions were; all I knew was this scenario wouldn’t end well for at least one party.

Realistically, I reminded myself dully as I snuck and followed behind Agnes, this vampire was probably just heading home after a decently fulfilling meal that involved no murder and no theft of bodily autonomy.

Like we should have been; instead, we were stalking her.

Agnes kept a fairly decent distance from her but still held the knife out at the ready. It seemed odd that the vampire’s steps were lazy, not measured or frightened; my friend might have been careful, but certainly made more noise than she thought.

The vampire either didn’t notice or didn’t care; I wasn’t sure which one was worse.

We made so many turns down thick alleys, thin alleys, across roads, under bridges, and I was beginning to feel a little lost. I kept my eyes peeled, but more importantly, I made sure everything smelled as it should. There were a few wafts of territorial stench, but they were far enough off not to worry about. The heavy scent of alcohol hung about our target; it hit my nostrils every time she exhaled or laughed.

It explained why she was so unaware of her surroundings.

It was probably past midnight when the vampire came to a dead end. She stopped and stared at the brick wall, her head tilted ever so slightly so that her dark hair rested on one of her curvy hips. “Huh…” she whispered, sounding generally confused. “I thought…”

“Well you thought wrong,” Agnes replied, low enough for only me to hear.

My heart pounded as I saw the woman start to turn. Without a second thought, I released a deep breath, forcing out enough hunting hormone that I practically spat on Agnes.

She whipped around and glared at me. She held the knife at shoulder-height, ready to stab as soon as the moment struck. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” she snapped loudly. “You just—”

“I’ve already eaten,” the woman blurted wildly. Her voice cascaded off the walls of the alley, the tone slightly distorted. “I’m not doing any harm!” The woman stared down at her six inch heels, no doubt listening as best she could for any sign of the person who released the hormone.

“Way to go. She heard you, you idiot!” Agnes spat, getting to her feet.

It dawned on me that the woman’s words could have been interpreted either way. I exhaled again, releasing more of the hormone, but this time more careful to keep the noise in check. “Sorry,” I whispered. “I-I… guess I’m just nervous?”

There was a distant thud. We both whipped around to find the woman was no where in sight. Either she assumed that she was interfering with my hunt from the start, or she legitimately heard us both. Whatever it was that tipped her off, she was gone and safe from Agnes’ knife.

“You suck. You really, really, fucking suck. Repeat after me. ’I suck balls.’”

I sighed as we made our way back home. “I… suck balls,” I repeated dully, my hands tucked into my pockets.

“And?” Agnes pressed, walking backwards down the sidewalk so she could face me. She was a great deal shorter than I was, yet she still had a way of staring down on me.

I wasn’t quite sure what she was trying to get at, and it took me a moment to respond. “A-And… I’m sorry for ruining tonight?”

The answer must have satisfied her, because she whipped around and started walking forward again. We walked in silence for a while, making our way closer to the main intersection that we would have to split at.

Finally, we stopped in front of the post office. The windows were dark, the office having been closed for hours. “You know what?” Agnes said abruptly, flopping to lean on the post office’s wall. Goosebumps ravaged her chest and legs, and she crossed her arms, rubbing them slightly.

“What?”

“It’s kinda my fault. I should have known better than to take a rookie into the field with me,” she answered, looking down at her boots with a frown.

Despite her use of ‘kind of,’ it was probably the closest thing I would get to an apology. “Well, not really,” I defended anyway. “I did ask to—”

“Still, the decision to allow you to come was mine,” she interrupted, looking back up at me from under stray strands. The humidity in the air made her messy ringlets appear even more feral. Her deep sigh synergized into a large-mouthed yawn. “So… I have to ask—how interested in this stuff are you?”

I blinked, taken aback by the question.

On one hand, learning about the stuff was potentially dangerous; any confirmation or denial of facts Agnes told me could lead me to being six feet under. Yet on the other hand, I could learn more about what I was, where my kind came from, and—even better—help vampires avoid being Agnes’ victims.

I must have taken longer to weigh my options than I thought, because she tapped her foot impatiently, the thick sole of her combat boot thunking against the sidewalk.

“Very!” I squeaked. A quick clearing of my throat couldn’t restore my dignity, but at least it could help me get past it. “I’m… I’m very interested in this stuff. It’s kind of… I dunno, it’s kind of cool knowing that this stuff exists outside of books, movies, and that stuff. Why?”

Agnes pursed her lips and squinted at me. “You’re a bit of a limp noodle, you stutter, so you’re probably always unsure of everything you do, you—”

“But?” I pressed, self-consciousness suddenly washing over me. God; I hoped there was a ‘but’.

“Well, I could probably whip you into some sort of shape,” Agnes explained, placing a hand on her hip. My bemused expression must have been apparent, because she rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. “You know. Train you. So you’re not so much of a handicap in the field.”

I opened my mouth, hoping the words would find themselves because my mind was in too much of a whirl to string anything together.

She nodded, taking my speechlessness for excitement. “That’s right. When I’m done with you, you’ll easily be popping those blood-sucking abominations like pimples on a pizza-face. Less painful for you, though.”

I frowned. “But… Train me? H-How do you—Where did you even—”

Agnes waved a careless hand in front of her, rolling her eyes. “Nuh-uh. Nope—no more questions until Sensei tells you, okay? The people who trained me don’t want anything to do with noobs like you; they’re much more concerned with saving the world. You in or not?”