Can’t Win Me Back by Ginger Sue

Jonah could not bear to think about the void that would swallow him if he lost Julien. The skies could fall and crush him, turning his life into a hopeless wreck. Gasping for breath, Jonah raced into the villa, which was cold, dark, and silent. Suddenly, memories he had buried deep surged back, overwhelming him. He gripped the hem of his shirt, struggling to steady his breathing while anguish clawed at him. Since Blake's death, he had never returned to this place. The man he loved had died when Jonah loved him most, and the depth of that devastation was unfathomable to anyone who had not experienced it themselves. But this was not the moment to drown in sorrow.

Jonah called out Julien's name again and again as he searched every room in the house for him.

When he reached the second floor, he spotted lights flickering in the home theater. His heart raced as he burst inside.

"Julien!"

Julien sat alone on the couch, a dazed look in his eyes. Scattered around his feet were white roses.

The video of Jonah and Blake's intimate moments was still playing on the screen, but it was muted. Julien was staring straight at it. Slowly, his pale lips curled up into a smile. He was mocking himself. "Julien... don't watch. Don't watch that!"

Jonah couldn't turn the screen off. He could only block Julien's view by standing in front of him. "Uri's targeting me. Don't let him get to you. Don't believe what he said!"

"Even if 99% of what he said was a lie, one thing was true." Julien raised his swollen eyes to Jonah, a broken smile touching his lips. "That man was the love of your life. Not me." Jonah's heart sank. "That's not "

"Actually, your heart... is gone. It's gone to be with that person." Julien's voice dragged out as though he had traversed great distances, wearied by his torment. "He is the love of your life, the one you could have given everything for. As for me, I am

merely a balm for your broken heart.

A fleeting substitute.

"I know you thought of him during those nights when you held me close. You must feel lucky to have found someone who looks just like him.

"Coincidentally, this person also fell hard for you. But what a pity... nothing can ever compare to that one true love. The fake will always be fake. You cannot deceive yourself about your own feelings." Tears welled in Jonah's eyes as he shook his head. The pain within him was becoming unbearable.

"I refuse to be a substitute. I would rather die than be someone else's shadow."

With that, Julien pulled a white rose from behind him. His expression turned cold and resolute as he raised the sharpened stalk to his cheek. He dragged it along his cheek, leaving a long, bloody mark. He smiled and asked, "Look, Jonah. Do I still look like him?"

"Julien! Don't!" Jonah's eyes widened. As he reached for the rose, Julien cut himself again.

The intersecting, bloodied lines on his face mirrored the agony of his shattered heart.

Tears streamed down Julien's face as he laughed. "Tell me. Do I... still look like him? Do you still want me?"

"Don't do this... Julien, please!"

Jonah dropped to his knees before him, gripping Julien's wrists. The man who once held such pride now seemed to care for none of it. He cried out, "I beg you... don't hurt yourself. You can do anything to me! Hate me, hit me... kill me! Just don't inflict pain on yourself. Please..."

His love for Julien ran deep, and nothing tormented him more than witnessing this self-inflicted suffering.

"Is your heart aching for me?" Julien

laughed, tears and blood staining his cheeks. "No, your heart doesn't ache for me. You're using me to ease your guilt over losing your true love. But now that you've redeemed yourself, who can save me?"

He closed his eyes, letting the white rose slip from his grasp. "Jonah, let's end it here."