SWNOVELS Chapter 66
She’s sitting on the sofa reading when I get home, looking lost and lonely. Fuck, I want to wrap her up and protect her from every goddamn thing in this world that could hurt her. And I want to spend the rest of my life doing it. I can’t let her go.
“Hey.” I perch on the coffee table in front of her.
“Hey. Did you have a good day?”
“I did actually.”
“That’s good,” she says, offering a feeble attempt at a smile.
“How do you feel about going out for dinner?” I check my watch. “I could get us a table at your favorite steakhouse.”
She wrinkles her nose. “I don’t really feel like peopling.”
I drop to my knees in front of her. “Then I’ll book out the whole place.”
That at least gets me a flicker of a genuine smile. “That’s such a Nathan James thing to do.”
“I just want to see a smile on your face, corazón. Tell me what I can do to make that happen.”
She presses her lips together like she’s deep in thought. “Food is always a good start. But takeout would be more my speed, I think.”
“Takeout will make you smile?”
“Not just any takeout. A pepperoni pizza from Jersey’s, and also …” She sinks her teeth into her plush lower lip.
“Also?”
“An old movie on the sofa? With you actually watching rather than working?” She winces like she’s asking too much, when it’s not nearly enough. An image of us curled up on the couch with her nestled against me, both of us snuggled beneath a blanket, makes my cock twitch in my pants. “That’s what you want to do tonight?”
She catches her bottom lip between her teeth. “More than anything.”
Why the hell is that true for me too? Cuddling on the couch and eating greasy pizza isn’t exactly me, but the thought of doing that with her sounds like heaven. “I have to send a few emails and take a shower. Can you order?”
Her eyes sparkle, and an actual smile flickers over her full pink lips. “And I get to choose the movie?”
I roll my eyes, feigning mild annoyance, but the truth is I’ll do anything as long as it involves being close to her. “If you insist.”
My pulse is racing as I dry off from the shower. We’re staying in and eating pizza on the couch, so why do I feel like I’m fifteen and about to go on my first date with Cindy Green? She was the head cheerleader in high school, and it took me months to work up the courage to ask her out. She said yes before I even finished the question, and I’ve never felt that nervous around a woman since. Until now.
I walk down the hallway toward the sound of her voice. Is she only just ordering the food? No, I can smell pizza. A familiar voice joins hers, and my heart drops through my stomach.
What the fuck is Tyler doing back in New York already?
I make my way into the kitchen and see the two of them hugging. They part when I walk into the room, and Mel looks at me, tears glistening in her eyes. “Tyler came home early.”
He spins on his heel. “Yeah. Thanks for looking after my girl while I was away. I can take care of her now.”
I lick my lips and stare at the two of them. She’s my fucking girl. At least I thought she was, but she’s so goddamn happy to see him. Maybe he is the right person to take care of her. She married me out of guilt over her family and nothing more. She’s already told me she wants to walk away from everything to do with them, and I can’t help but think that includes me too.
“He brought up the pizza.” Melanie nods to the box on the table.
“Great. You two should take it with you,” I say, having to force the words out of my mouth.
Her face falls, and I want to kick myself in the ass for saying it, then kick Tyler out of my apartment, but my stupid pride won’t let me.
“I guess I should go get my things then,” she says quietly.
I don’t answer her. Instead I glare at Tyler, the man responsible for ruining my fucking night, and quite possibly my whole fucking life.
Mel slips out of the room, and Tyler plants his hands on the kitchen counter, his lips pressed together in a thin line and his eyes narrowed with suspicion.
“You know I always respected you. Always thought you were this super smart guy who didn’t give a fuck what other people thought of you, but I …” He shakes his head. “Now, I guess I know better.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
He licks his lips and glances at the open doorway before turning all his attention back to me. “She’s the best damn thing that’s ever happened to you, Nathan. And I think you know that too.”
My hands ball into fists. “Don’t assume to know what I’m thinking, Tyler.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t dare.” He barks a sarcastic laugh and sits at the island, then takes off his baseball cap and runs a hand through his hair. “You know, she always loved animals. Begged her daddy for a dog every single Christmas and birthday from the day she could talk. And when she turned thirteen, a few months before he was killed, he finally gave in.”
Why the hell is he telling me this right now?
“But Mel didn’t want no new puppy. Nope, she made him take her to the pound. And when we got there, she chose the oldest, ugliest mutt you’ve ever seen in your life. I mean this thing had a gray muzzle and one eye, but she insisted he was her dog. Now Mel’s mom might be a stone-cold bitch, but Luke adored his kids. He didn’t want his little girl getting attached to a dog that only had a little bit of life left in him. When he sat her down and explained that this dog likely only had a few years left at best, you know what she said?”
I suppress a sigh. “No.”
“She looked him square in the eye and said, ‘We could get a puppy who gets sick and dies or gets run over. Love doesn’t care how much time we have. It just takes its happiness where it can find it.’ And he got her that dog on the spot. She called him Floyd, and he was her best buddy for three years. He died a few days after she turned sixteen, and she was fucking heartbroken. Her mom told her she was stupid for getting so attached to something she knew was going to die, but that dog brought her happiness and comfort that can’t be measured, and I know for a damn fact she still would have chosen him if she knew he only had three months left.”
A knot of emotion balls in my throat, making it hard to speak, so when I do there’s a distinct crack in my voice. “Cute story.”
Tyler gives a single shake of his head and huffs a laugh. “The point is, Nathan, nobody knows what tomorrow’s about to bring. You have to grab onto whatever little slice of happiness while you can, and you have to fucking live in it. If your relationship with Mel is truly over, yeah, you should absolutely let it go. Things die all the time, but killing them to stop them from dying is my idea of batshit crazy. So if you’re only ending this with her in case it might cause you more pain later on down the line, well then, for all your fancy degrees and your razor-sharp brain, you’re the biggest fucking fool I ever met.”
He walks out of the kitchen, and I’m left staring after him with so many questions and feelings running through my head that I sway on my feet.
The sound of soft footsteps shakes me from my daze. A second later, she walks through the door, dressed in a sweater and jeans, her cheeks pink and her eyes red like she’s been crying.
“Where’s Ty?” she asks, her voice thick with emotion.
I shake my head. “I thought he went to look for you.”
She glances behind her. “Maybe he went to the bathroom.”
I walk around the other side of the island, my heart racing faster with each step I take toward her. She watches me, chewing on her lip and shuffling her feet.
I take a deep breath, remembering how excited she was just a half hour earlier at the prospect of watching a movie with me. Tyler’s right—if life has taught me anything, it’s that happiness doesn’t always last, and we have to hold onto whatever slice we can get of it. “Stay, Mel.”
She blinks up at me, and I take another step, closing the distance until we’re only inches apart. “What?” Her voice is barely a whisper.
“Don’t go home with Tyler.”
“I d-don’t understand. Like stay for tonight?”
I slide a hand to the back of her neck and stuff the other one into the pocket of my sweatpants to stop myself from picking her up, carrying her to bed, and chaining her to it. “No, not for tonight. Not to give me a kid. And not because you feel guilty or because of anything to do with our families. Stay for me. Because you are the only thing in this entire world that I cannot fucking live without.”
Her lips part, but she doesn’t speak. Her breath hitches in her throat.
“I love you, Mel, and I would die tomorrow if it means I get to love you for today.”
Tears fill her eyes, and for a heart-stopping, world-ending moment, I think she’s going to tell me that it’s too late. “I love you too, Nate.”
I move on pure instinct, crashing my lips against hers as I wrap my free arm around her waist and pull her body flush against my own. Sliding my tongue inside her mouth, I claim her, groaning with relief and desire, and the sound mingles with her whimpers. Her hands snake around my neck, fingers tangling in my hair and pulling me closer. She feels so good in my arms, but I need more. I’m done waiting. I want her more than I’ve ever wanted anything before.
“I guess I’m going home alone then?” Tyler’s voice drifts through the room.
I stop kissing her, but I don’t remove my lips from hers. “Get the fuck out of here, Ty.”
He snorts a laugh. “Rude. Can I at least take a slice of pizza?”
Pulling back, I suck in a gulp of air. “Take the whole thing, just go.”
I vaguely hear the sound of his laughter and the rustle of a pizza box before his footsteps disappear and it’s just me and her again.
She tips her head back, teeth sinking into her lip and her green eyes twinkling. “He just took our dinner.”
I plant my hands either side of her, bracketing her hips and pushing her against the counter. “Not my dinner, corazón.”
She flutters her dark eyelashes, a smile lighting up her beautiful face. I should lift her onto the counter and take her right now, but it’s been so long since I’ve touched her, and I need to take my time. Picking her up, I wrap her legs around my waist and carry her to the bedroom where I can take as long as I need to reacquaint myself with every delicious inch of her delectable body.
As soon as I get her into our bedroom, I peel off her clothes, kissing her skin as I expose it to the cool air. She shivers at my touch, goosebumps breaking out over her flesh.
“You’re fucking perfect, corazón. Fucking perfect,” I growl when she’s naked, pushing her back onto the bed.
She watches me undress, her eyes hooded and her chest heaving with the effort of drawing air. I crawl over her, allowing my gaze to rake over every bare inch of her. She is so fucking beautiful. She wraps her arms around my neck, hurriedly pulling my face to hers, and I kiss her briefly, but her lips aren’t where I want my mouth right now. I trail lower, dragging my teeth over her skin, and she arches her back, fingers threading through my hair as she moans my name.
I lick a path from her collarbone to her nipples, giving each one a gentle bite before swirling my tongue over the tip. Then I move lower, my lips barely leaving her skin. “I’ve missed this so fucking much, Mel.”
“So have I,” she moans, writhing beneath me. “I need you, Nate.”
I spread her thighs wider apart and dip my head so her sweet scent fills my nose. “I know, corazón. You’ve got me.”
I lick a path along her wet center and my cock weeps precum at the sounds my mouth pulls from her. She needs this as much as I do, which makes me all the more desperate to remind her exactly how good we are together. Swirling my tongue over her clit, I groan as her taste coats my tongue.
“You still get so fucking wet for me, huh, corazón?”
“Y-yeah.” She bucks her hips, riding my face while I suck and lick her, moving up and down her soaking pussy before concentrating on her needy clit. I suck the swollen bud into my mouth and slide a finger inside her, and she comes apart, her legs shaking and her pussy walls contracting as she screams my name. And fuck me, I have missed hearing that.
I lick her through her climax, drawing out the waves of pleasure until her body stops trembling. Then I trail my lips over her stomach and back up to her neck before I settle between her spread thighs. With her hands clasped in mine and pinned above her head, I nudge my cock at the entrance of her soaking pussy and inch inside.
“Nate,” she gasps, and I sense a hesitation in her voice, even with her head thrown back and tits heaving with each breath. I’m reminded of what her body’s been through the past two weeks, and I pepper kisses over her throat. “Is this okay? Am I hurting you?”
She sinks her heels into the muscles of my ass and hisses out a breath. “Not hurting, but … I’m not on any birth control.”
Jesus fuck! Why does that make me even more desperate to fill her with my cum? “I don’t give a single fuck about that, corazón. Do you?”
She shakes her head, her bottom lip caught between her teeth.
I sink deeper and stare into her bright green eyes. “You want this?”
Her eyes roll back in her head. “Yes!” I seal my lips over hers and slide all the way inside her, filling up every inch of her hot, wet channel, and fuck me, but it feels like coming home. Bone-deep relief and pleasure roll through me, igniting a fire in every cell of my body while I slowly drive in and out of her, letting her feel every inch of me each time I fill her.
This is as far removed from fucking as things can possibly get. This is two halves of the same soul coming back together. This is me giving and taking every-fucking-thing we have left. She whimpers, her sweet sounds full of desperation as I take her slowly and deliberately, committing every second of this to my memory for eternity. Feeling every part of her body submitting to mine each time I sink inside her again. And when her whimpers turn to moans and her walls flutter around me, I roll my hips, sweeping the tip of my cock over the sensitive spot deep inside her that has her trembling in my arms and whispering my name like a prayer.
I’m on the edge too, but I need to give her more. Need to take more. Sliding out of her, I smile when she whines a protest, but I fill her with my fingers instead, moving down her body and feasting on her soaked pussy while I fuck her with my hand. She writhes beneath me, her body chasing another release that I’m desperate to give her. As if I can make up for all the time apart in one night. It might be impossible, but I sure as hell intend to try.
She comes for me a second time, her juices running down my palm and onto my wrist, and I lap them up, reveling in her succulent, addictive taste. I will never get enough of this. Of her. Of us.
I brush her hair back from her forehead, pressing a soft kiss on her lips and making her refocus on me. Her green eyes dark with desire, her cheeks flushed pink, and her pretty lips parted, she comes down from her climax. Without breaking our gaze, I slide my cock inside her once more, and her back bows.
“Nate!” she mewls, digging her fingernails into my shoulder blades.
I press my forehead against hers and fuck her slowly. “I know, corazón. I’ve got you.”
Tears leak from the corners of her eyes. “You feel too good,” she says, her voice hoarse. “Tell me we can have this forever.”
She damn near knocks the breath from my lungs. I never want her doubting me—doubting us—ever again. I dust my lips over her ear. “I promise you forever and a day, corazón.”
She rocks her hips and wraps her arms around my neck. “I’ll hold you to that.”
I go on steadily fucking her at a leisurely pace until I can’t stave off my own release for a second longer. When I come inside her, filling her tight cunt with my cum, I damn near pass out from the rush of endorphins flying through my body.
But as incredible as it feels to be inside her, nothing beats having her curled up in my arms after. I order us another pizza, and we eat in bed, watching the cheesy romantic movie she chose. She falls asleep before the end, her head on my chest and her thigh draped over mine, her bare wet pussy resting on my hip.
I kiss the top of her head and smile. My wife. My every-fucking-thing.