SWNOVELS Bright Like Midnight: Chapter 18
we’re going.”
“I won’t.”
“But I asked so nicely.”
Amir slid a sly smirk my way. “You always ask nicely, Zadie. Because you’re a good girl. A sweet, nice girl.”
I made a face at him that he didn’t see since his eyes were on the road. “I can be mean. Watch what happens if it turns out you’re taking me to…I don’t know, a monster truck show.”
That made him laugh. “Way to ruin the surprise. When we get there, your ass is going to be spanked.”
I pressed my legs together involuntarily. “If you’re really taking me to a monster truck show, you’re going to get spanked too.”
He cupped himself. “Keep talking dirty to me, mama, we’ll never get to the monster truck rally.”
I groaned, covered my face with my hands. “I can’t tell if you’re being serious and I hate it.”
“I’m always serious,” he replied.
“I know.” I peeked at him through my fingers. “Which is why I’m really scared right now.”
This was the night out Amir promised me, only it was happening a week later. Last Saturday…well, we hadn’t made it out of his house.
I climbed into Amir’s SUV. He took one look at me, and his head fell back on the rest. His eyes squeezed shut, and he exhaled heavily through his nose.
“Hi.” I hadn’t been shy with him in a long time, but that was before. I had never had a huge attachment to my virginity, but I felt different. Not like I’d given away a piece of me, more like I’d taken back something that had been stolen. So, it was important. Kind of monumental. I couldn’t help attaching emotion to it, and by proxy, to Amir.
And of course, he couldn’t stand the sight of me. It had only been eight hours we were apart, and now this. It was like I physically pained him.
When he didn’t reply, I put my hand on the door. “Okay…well, I think I’m going to go back inside. It’s already late anyway and—”
His hand clamped on my thigh in a flash. Leaning across the console, Amir put his face in mine. “Do you honestly think you’re going back to your dorm right now?”
His lashes were so thick, it seemed he had double the amount of an average human. They only served to intensify the heat he emitted in his glare. Why he was glaring at me, I had no idea.
I leaned in too, but instead of glaring, I nibbled his chin. “Stop looking at me like you’re angry.”
He pressed his thumb to my lips. “Are you going to bite me every time you don’t like something I’m doing?”
“Maybe. You still haven’t said hi to me. That’s making me feel extra bite-y right now.”
His lips twitched. “Hi, Zadie Night. You look so breathtakingly beautiful and mind-numbingly hot, I forgot my manners.”
“What?”
He jerked his chin. “You heard me.”
I touched my fingers to his cheek. “No one’s ever said anything like that to me before. I’m processing.”
He did the thing again, closing his eyes and breathing heavy from his nose. I didn’t know what that meant, other than he might have found me annoying. I should have kept my biting ways to myself, but since they were exclusive to Amir, I didn’t quite know how.
Finally, he put the truck in gear, driving with determination through campus. At the main entrance, he went the opposite way I had expected, and soon, we were pulling up to his house.
“Did you need to pick something up?” I asked.
“No. I changed my mind.” He turned the car off and climbed out, stalking around it to open my door. “Get out, Zadie.”
He said it gently, so I didn’t bristle. I let him take my hand, helping me hop down to the curb. With his long fingers splayed on the base of my back, he nudged me along the path to the front door and inside.
“We’re really not going out?” I asked.
“No. We’re not.” He wove our fingers together, dragging me through the house. But I didn’t want to be dragged, and since I wasn’t a pet anymore—not strictly one anyway—I put up a protest.
Twisting my hand, I pulled free from his grip and stopped walking, fists at my hips. He whirled around, frowning at me like I’d murdered his kitten.
“Don’t take you away from me.”
My fists tightened. “Don’t drag me around like a dog!”
He ate the space between us, slid his arm around my waist, and pulled me against his chest. “I’m fifteen seconds from losing my mind. If I don’t get you in my bedroom right now, I’m fucking you right here. I don’t know where Julien and Marco are, but I can’t promise they’re not here. If I get you in my room, I can calm down and take it slow, like I know you need. If I do it here, I can’t promise to be soft.”
“What?” I breathed.
He dipped his face to the curve of my neck, inhaling along my shoulder and throat.
“Have you seen yourself tonight, mama? You look like a little fallen angel, all tits and ass and soft and naughty.” He rocked his hips, prodding my belly with his hard cock. “You feel that?”
I nodded, lost for words. How was this real? How was I affecting this beautiful man so profoundly? It wasn’t fake. He wasn’t pretending. My flirty black dress with the deep V and ruffled hem—perfect for the dancing I’d been promised—had stolen his carefully guarded control.
Heat pooled in the tender area between my thighs.
“I feel it,” I answered.
“Let me take you upstairs, Zadie.”
I nodded. He took my hand in his, brought it to his mouth, and dragged his lips across my knuckles. And when we got to his bedroom, he calmed down and took care. We went slow, and it was different than the first time. Amir and I got lost in each other, touching, tasting, making love. Because that was what it had felt like. Something separate from sex or fucking.
Something kind of beautiful.
Since that night, we’d spent a lot of time in Amir’s bed. I never slept there. I couldn’t until I told Elena and Helen we were a couple, and I just wasn’t ready for that. They wouldn’t approve, and if I were honest, I was still holding my breath, waiting for this to blow up in my face any day now. I’d rather not prove them right when it did.
We drove for longer than I’d expected, and I still had no idea where we were going. I was promised dancing, but that was all I knew. If I ended up at a hoedown at a monster truck show for real, I was walking home.
Somehow, I didn’t picture Amir, in his sleek, tailored black pants and button-up shirt, enjoying monster trucks. Just a hunch.
When we drove through a quaint beach town, I really didn’t know what to expect, and Amir wasn’t spilling. He parked, tucked my arm in his, and led me down a small boardwalk next to the sand to the entrance of a restaurant surrounded by tiki torches.
Live music floated on the ocean breeze, and as the hostess showed us to our table on a patio by the beach, my stomach fluttered with excitement.
A band was set up on the far side of the patio, playing music that sounded like it had come straight from the tropics. Beyond them, a large bonfire was burning on the sand. Couples were dancing on the beach, having made their own dance floor.
“Wow.” When I finished scanning my surroundings, I brought my gaze to Amir’s, finding him already watching me. “I love this.”
“Better than monster trucks?”
I laughed, my cheeks heating with pleasure. “Yes. Unequivocally. Please never take me to a monster truck show. I will never forgive you.”
He took my hand, running his thumb along one of my fingernails. “One day, you’re going to have to tell me what you have against monster trucks. Seems like a deep-seated thing.”
I smiled at him, at the side of himself he was showing me. Instinctively, I knew he hadn’t shown this side to many people, so I would guard it as carefully as a lit match on a windy day.
“Have you been here before?” I asked.
“No. I asked around.”
“I thought you’d take me to a club to dance.”
He nodded. “I would take anyone else to a club. And we’ll do that too. The thing is, I’m not in a place with you where I trust myself to be cool when there are other men around you, looking at you, seeing you move in one of your sexy as fuck dresses.”
I swallowed hard. “I might be a terrible dancer. You don’t even know.”
“I know. I’ve had you in my bed, mama. I know how that body moves.”
Fortunately for my wet panties, a waiter came by to take our order. When he smiled at me, Amir nearly came out of his chair. I would have laughed except I could tell he was genuinely struggling with his blind jealousy. And since I had felt that way only a week ago, I understood the plight.
As soon as the waiter left with our order, I scooted my chair over so I was right beside Amir, twisted my arm around his, and entwined our fingers. He took my leg and draped it over his, trailing his fingers up the inside of my thigh then back down to my knee.
“When does it get better?” I asked.
“What? When does what get better?”
“With your past girlfriends…when did you get to that place where you could be cool? A week? A month?”
His brow furrowed. “Never.”
“Oh.” I wasn’t the table-flipping type, but, man, I had to suppress the urge to flip the table in front of me. Thinking about Amir being possessive over other women turned me into a furious ball of rage. “Okay, well—”
“Hey.” He took my chin in his free hand, turning my face to his, running his nose along the length of mine. “Never because I haven’t cared enough about another girl to make her mine. This is all new territory to me. I can’t promise I’ll ever be cool.”
“Are you…?” I pressed my lips together, gathering my thoughts. “Are you telling me you’ve never had a girlfriend?”
He stared back at me, unblinking. “That’s what I’m telling you. I never planned on having one, not while I’m in school doing what I do for Reno. Relationships can be messy. They’d take my mind off what I need it to be on.”
“Oh.” My shoulders curled inward.
“Don’t tell me you planned on me.”
I sucked in a breath, pushing down my hurt feelings. “No, I didn’t.”
“Take that frown off your lips. I told you I don’t like when you’re sad. I can’t stand it.” He pressed his thumb against my mouth. “I never planned on a girlfriend because I didn’t know you existed. You’re so fucking easy and unmessy. Like a dream, mama.”
And just like that, my hurt feelings were gone.
“That’s incredibly sweet.” I aimed to kiss his cheek, but he turned, giving me his lips instead. It was quick, but just as sweet as his words. “I hate to contradict you, but I come with a lot of baggage.”
“That’s other people. You aren’t making the drama. I’m talking about you, Zadie. There’s nothing messy or conniving or shady about you. You don’t manipulate. Fuck, I trust you, and the number of people I trust, I can count on one hand. I think you might be a little whack for being into me, but I’d say that’s in the plus column.”
I giggled even though an inkling of guilt wormed its way around my stomach. I wasn’t manipulative, but I had manipulated my way into Amir’s life and under his protection. I guess that made me shady and conniving too—the exact type of girl he didn’t want.
But things had changed now. We were different. I would never do anything like that again. I’d acted out of desperation and need, and only because I knew I wouldn’t hurt him. I didn’t have that in me, not when it came to Amir.
“I’m not denying being a little whack, considering I’m sitting here, holding hands with my captor.”
Amir huffed a laugh. “You think Katie Holmes ever saw the dealer again?”
I scrunched my nose. “You mean, after Go? Probably not. His name was Todd. Todd the drug dealer.” I shuddered. “No, definitely not.”
“So, if my name was Todd, we wouldn’t be sitting here?”
I had to bite my lip to hold back a smile. “Again, definitely not. You’re lucky you have a good name.”
He touched his lips to mine. “Definitely lucky, princess.”
“I’m princess now?”
“I’ve been thinking about the story you told me about your name. Something occurred to me later. Something I’d forgotten.”
I leaned closer, my breasts flush with his bicep. “Tell me right now. I demand it.”
“Bossy.” He grinned into another light kiss. “You know what Amir means in Arabic?”
“I don’t.”
“It means prince.”
My breath hitched. “You’re kidding.”
He shook his head. “I’m not. You and me, we’re some kind of prince and princess out of a twisted fairytale.”
“I don’t know about twisted. The captor and the princess is pretty classic.”
Amir’s brow lowered over his intense gaze. “This is what I mean about you. I see us being together as something twisted, because a guy like me should never have anything so pure and sweet. But you, my sweet little mama, look at us like something that makes sense, something inevitable.”
“I don’t know about inevitable. But I’m okay with us having different outlooks. I probably could use a little cynicism, and I’ll be happy to shower you with puppies and rainbows.”
He reared back, hands up in defense. “The fuck? Do not throw puppies at me.”
Laughing, I grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him to me. He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me right into his lap. Even though we were in a restaurant, surrounded by other people, I decided not to care since he didn’t. Not one little bit.
My toes were sinking into the sand. My body was sinking into Amir’s. His hands were on my rocking hips, knee between my legs, pressing against my core. He led our pace, stirring our bodies to the rhythm of the sultry Caribbean music. We weren’t alone, but it felt like it, the way we were wrapped in each other.
Amir could dance. He’d led me out here after we finished our dinner, and we hadn’t taken a break since. He took charge of us both, leading me the whole way. The way he moved, fluid and confident, had me aching for him, to find somewhere dark and take him inside me. At the same time, I never ever wanted this night to end.
The music slowed but remained just as sexy. Amir spun me around and bent his knees so my butt was cupped by his hips. Under the light of the moon, we rocked together. His hands were all over me, running down my sides, over the curve of my stomach, faintly touching my breasts. I reached up and threaded my fingers together behind his neck, giving him full access to all of me.
We weren’t alone, not by a long shot, but we were so lost in each other, we might as well have been. Everything faded. My troubles, our differences, the secrets neither of us were willing to touch. We were whittled down to two bodies, breathing and moving, touching and feeling.
“You’re so fucking sexy, mama.” His teeth scraped my earlobe. “
Tipping my head to the side, I pressed a kiss to the underside of his jaw. “You’re sexy too.”
I felt his smile on the curve of my neck. “Yeah? You think I’m sexy?”
“Mmhmm. I don’t think many men can dance like you do.”
He took my hand and spun me in a dizzying circle. We ended up with our chests flush, our hands clasped between us, his other so low on my back, his fingers brushed my ass, and my hand curled around his neck.
I’d definitely never had such a romantic moment in my life. Every inch of my skin prickled with awareness of the man holding me. My insides were thrumming. How could I have this? Dancing on the beach with the exact person I wanted to be with. This entire night was so far removed from my life two years ago, I would have thought it was a dream, except I would have never been so audacious to dream something like this.
Above us, lightning cracked the inky sky. I might have jumped had Amir not had his arms around me.
A fat drop of rain landed on my shoulder, followed quickly by another and another.
“Is it raining?” I asked, incredulous the weather would dare interrupt our perfect night.
He dropped his forehead to mine, heaving a sigh. “Damn. I didn’t even think about checking the weather.”
There was something about the way he sagged with disappointment that made my heart swell. He cared about giving me this. It was important to him.
“I would dance in the rain with you.” Once I realized the truth of my words, the raindrops smattering on my shoulders and head weren’t such a big deal. The night was warm, and my skin was heated from being so close to Amir, I didn’t mind the rain one little bit.
The sky took that as a challenge, because a moment later, it opened up with a deluge so powerful, we were soaked to the bone in an instant. This, I conceded in my head, was a lot less fun.
We ran, hand in hand, along with the rest of the crowd.
Unlike them, I was laughing and not the least bit upset. When Amir heard me, his steps slowed until we were standing still beside his SUV.
He cupped my smiling face. “Why aren’t you upset? Your dress, your hair, it’s all…”
“It’s wet, and I can’t find it in me to care.” I rose on my toes, catching his chin with a kiss. “Dance with me for a little bit longer.”
Amir studied me with eyes darker than the jet-black sky. Then he spun me in tight circles before pulling me into his chest with a wet smack and rocked me to the beat of the rain slapping the ground. His smile was indulgent and fevered as I laughed. I’d never danced in the rain with anyone, and it made perfect sense that my first time would be with Amir. He was quickly claiming all my first times and turning them into something so much more than I ever could have imagined.
I tipped my head back to the sky, letting the rain drop on my face. Amir held me against him, and I felt his eyes on me, watching, always watching.
His hand scraped up my back to tangle in my hair, pushing my face forward so our eyes met. His gaze was bright, but somewhat frenzied.
“Hi,” I whispered just loud enough to be heard above the falling rain.
“You’re so fucking mine,” he declared in a tone so ferocious, my toes curled.
His mouth descended onto mine before he gave me a chance to agree, but the words bounced around in my head.
I’m so fucking yours.