Big girls don't cry

Aleida’s POV

I need release, and no, not in a dirty way! I’m pissed off at my mates and am in serious need of training. That’s why I walk out towards the training ground and find almost thirty male wolves sparring. Paul, the head warrior, is leading the practice today. With determined steps, I walk right up to him and whisper in his ear.

“I need a fearless, strong sparring partner; I’m angry,” he just nods at me and yells out an order for everyone to stop.

“The big alpha needs a sparring partner to release some anger, is someone brave enough to take her on?” he asks.

Several hands go up in the air, and I smirk at their interest. One particular person catches my eye—the cocky blonde guy from Miliano’s pack. I point my finger at him.

“You, pretty boy, come here. We never got to start our last fight since I kind of disappeared. You up for the challenge?” I ask; he smirks and nods his head.

“Come on then, pup, show me what you can do,” I mock; the others laugh, and he looks annoyed.

“I’m older than you!” he exclaims.

“Well, I’m an alpha. Which gives me much knowledge just through my bloodline; I’m practically twenty years older than you in my mind.”

“Are we gonna talk, or are we gonna fight?” he spits out.

“Eager, are we?” I ask.

“I don’t take orders from a little girl who doesn’t know her place,” he spits, which earns him many growls, not from me, however.

“It’s okay, boy; I will put you in your place soon enough.”

I stand ready in a fighting position, and he does the same. It doesn’t take long before I can predict his movements. He’s a good fighter, but I’m an alpha, and besides, I’ve thirteen years of training under my belt. I know every martial art there is and can use any weapon; I have dedicated my life to know these things. He tries to punch me in the face, but I’m faster and dodges his attack. My fist crashes against his ribcage, and I hear a loud crack. He growls at me in pain. Again he tries to attack me, but my legs this time. Again, I’m faster and give him a roundhouse kick that makes him flying about three meters away from me. He shifts and has now lost control. His eyes are pitch black, and he rushes towards me, aiming at my stomach. I can hear everyone growl loudly; everyone knows that I’m pregnant. My mates are yelling my name. Before the boy even can come near me, I jump on his back and put my arm around his throat. He bucks his hips, but I’m stronger. He wheezes, and soon he’s unconscious. I won as I predicted. My mates come running up to me, looking me all over in search of injuries.

“What the hell were you thinking!?” Kian exclaims.

“I’m thinking that it’s better that I let out some steam, sparring with someone instead of killing you both with my bare hands,” I say and dust off my clothes. “Besides, I know what I’m doing and would never put my baby in danger. Have a little faith in me for moon goddess sake. Do I look like some fucking newbie? I could take you both on at the same time and still win; you both know it. Stop treating me like you actually care; you don’t.”

“How can you say that!?” Miliano exclaims, clearly upset with what I say.

“Well, neither of you took what I said seriously, and you blew me off like I was some kind of desperate she-wolf. I’m your fucking luna and an alpha. Don’t you believe for one second that I don’t know how to handle myself!” I growl before bumping into them when I walk away. “Thank you for the help, Paul; you’re a star.”

“Anytime, luna!”

With a smirk, I walk into the house, more determined than ever before, to make a difference in my mates’ minds. I reach the elders’ home and knock at the door. An older woman opens and curtsy at me.

“Alpha,” she acknowledges.

“Please, none of that. I’m just Aleida. May I come in, please?”

“Certainly,” she says and moves away from the doorframe to let me in.

I take the liberty of sitting down in the first chair I see. Damn, that sparring took more on me than I thought it would. The woman sits down opposite me and gives me a knowing look.

“We could all feel your anger all the way from the packhouse, child. What seems to be the problem?”

“The problem is my incompetent mates who don’t realize we’re heading into a war, unprepared. I have repeatedly tried to talk to them and make them understand the seriousness, but they don’t want to listen to me! It’s like they have...”

“A mental wall in the way,” she ends the sentence for me while I look at her amazingly; she laughs heartily. “I’m an elder, alpha, and this is something that we have all felt long before they found you. The elderly from alpha Miliano’s pack came here with him, and we all live here together. Just as they have for many years, we tried to break the mental barrier they both have set up without succeeding. It’s a dark kind of magic that none of us know how to crack.”

“Where does this sorcery come from?”

“We’re not entirely sure. I thought from the beginning that it was Hailey, which it wasn’t because her spell should have died with her, and no change has occurred. There aren’t many witches left in the world and, above all, not around here. Whoever is closest and who is doing this kind of magic, we banished a long time ago from this city.”

“What’s her name?”

“Jana. She, just like Hailey, had a crush on both alpha Miliano and alpha Kian. We don’t know what makes the witches drawn to both of them, but it’s no coincidence that it happens twice in the space of ten years. There’s a purpose for that, and we suspect that purpose is you.”

“Me!?”

“That’s right, you. You’re our queen and hold power within you, stronger than any of us can imagine. You have a prophecy to fulfill within a certain time frame. When that prophecy fulfills, only you and the moon goddess know. If you fail, the chances are that the almighty power you have within you is used for the wrong purpose and taken by a witch, with anything but good in herself. The purpose of the power you possess isn’t to harm and be cruel to other beings; it’s to improve our world for all of us. If an evil witch gets hold of that power, the whole world can end soon. She can use the power to bow all of us supernatural beings to her will, and we can do nothing but obey. A terrible fate if you ask me...”

“What am I supposed to do then?”

“There’s not much you can do really, no matter how hard it is to swallow it down, you have no choice. You can do nothing but keep trying to get your mates to understand the seriousness of the threat we’ll soon have before us. That and to complete your plan of leaving the pack when it’s time. Yeah, I know about that too, you don’t have to worry, your secret is safe with me. The moon goddess came to me in a dream and asked me to help you succeed in getting you out of here, that promise I intend to fulfill. We’ll look over what we can find about Jana, and I can even try to contact two good witches I know to see if they know anything we don’t. By the way, you can just continue, as usual, pretending like nothing. When the time comes, you’ll be well prepared and get out of here with your pup safe and sound.”

I nod slowly, trying to process the information circulating in my head; I carry on a great responsibility not only in my stomach but also on my shoulders.

“Thank you for all your help; we keep in touch,” I say and get up; she nods, smiling at me.

“By the way, keep training and keep fighting; your pup is safe. That’s what your wolf and the moon goddess have taken care of.”

Instead of sitting in the dining room with everyone else, I choose to sit down on a barstool in the kitchen, alone. My mates will undoubtedly start a discussion in there if I walk in there, and I have no desire or strength for it right now. My brain is on high speed, and all I really want to do is go to my mates. I want to remove their blocks and help them understand. To love me, the mother of their children, the way they should. I know that they don’t love me in the way they should because they’re simply unable to do so right now. But when all this is over, then I’ll take both of them in my arms and never let go. Hopefully, my disappearance will break down the wall they have set up successively. I desire that the feeling of losing their mate will make them return to their lives aware of what has happened in the meantime.

“Alpha?”

Michael’s voice makes me jump. I’m so inside of my own head that I don’t notice him right before my eyes.

“Yes, Michael?”

“How are you, really? No bullshit this time...”

I sigh and can feel the lump in my throat that I continue to suppress, growing and making it hard to breathe. My eyes fill with unshed tears, and when I look up at Michael, he looks devastated to see me like this.

“Oh, Aleida...”

He walks up to me and holds me in his arms while I cry my eyes out. My sobs echo throughout the packhouse, and I really don’t care right now; my mates are nowhere to be seen, which is just another sign that they don’t and can’t love me as a mate should right now. They don’t know that the witch can wipe out all their happiness in a heartbeat; I’ll soon disappear with their babies. The two things that make their life worth living are preparing to leave them. If only they knew, then they would understand and behave as real mates should. I know that I can’t put this on them, that it’s a spell. But it’s tough not to hold them at least a little bit responsible. Some kind of own will they must have left. Do they even fight the force inside them, or have they given up a long time ago? When all my bottled-up feelings are bawled out of my eyes, I walk back to our old house with Michael. I tell the betas and my brother to keep my mates away from here. They all understand why I feel like I do because they all believe me when I tell them about the war arriving soon. The whole pack can feel the change in the air, every single one of them, except the alphas. They’re still living in their fantasy where everything is fine and always will be. I lay down on the bed, and Michael, who shifts before we reach the house, is lying on the floor in wolf form. With my bodyguard beside me, I can finally sleep without any nightmares in a long, long time.