Big Bad Wolfie

Maria's POV

My breath got caught in my lungs at the sight of him in his wolf form.

This isn't my first time seeing him, but it is my first time seeing him without an ugly snarl on his face. Or without having to worry about the battle around me, so I can appreciate him. He's gorgeous.

So tall and dark.

I can hardly pick a place to admire first. The strong muscles covering his legs. The pitch blackness of his fur. The fierceness in his eyes.

The scar on his shoulder screams for my attention though, as the only spot not shrouded in deep black fur. Even my mark is covered. But I know it's there.

It only adds to the masterpiece that is his wolf.

And he knows it by the looks of it.

Standing proudly, his chin up, and his stance strong. Showing off any battle scars proudly.

I wish I had the same ability.

To not care about the uglier scars that canvas my body. To even be proud of them.

Maybe one day, with their help, I will.

I shook my head to clear my thoughts. That's for another day.

I put all my attention back on Malaki.

So majestic and fierce.

In this form, he's the embodiment of an alpha wolf. Not hindered by fear or hesitation or shame, like Jason is plagued with. Just pure power, instinct, and confidence.

I guess that's one of the perks of being a literal animal.

But Jason is in there. I know he'll stand this proudly one day too.

I shook my head once more to get myself out of the trance. I'm probably stroking his ego far too generously with all this gawking.

Once he was done enjoying watching me admire him, he trotted up to me like a d@mn show horse.

I rolled my eyes but couldn't hold back the grin.

He let out a small yip and gestured with his massive wolf head to hop on his back. I immediately started feeling hesitant again, but his excited puppy dog eyes made me groan and do as he wanted. Getting on his back felt similar to mounting a horse with his massive size - I was never fond of horses - but I made it work.

Once I was on, I noticed his tail wagging excitedly and I shook my head.

"I'm doing this now, but you've got some explaining to do when we get back," I pointed a stern finger at his face.

His tail stopped wagging and went between his legs.

"Mhm, what? Did you think you were off the hook?"

Malaki freaking barked at me.

"Don't bark at me," I glared at him, "you're not a dog, are you?"

He narrowed his eyes and growled lowly.

"Y'know I could always walk back to the pack house," I threatened.

He took off in a sprint towards the pack house, nearly knocking me off in the process, and seeming to have nothing else to grumble about. Mhm, that's what I thought.

We made it back, and he switched back to his human form. I could tell it was still Malaki in the driver's seat though, because of his golden eyes.

He used the opportunity to smile at me and lead me straight to a large room with a couch, TV, love seat and little coffee table, along with a bunch of knickknacks scattered around.

It looks like a living room, but it's in the back of the house and seems rather secluded.

I waited for him to sit down on the couch and sat in the love seat away from him.

I know I just road all the way here on his back, and it was honestly a blast having the wind flow through my hair and feeling his mark react to his touch, but it got me thinking about how it got there. About how my mark got on his neck.

"So... Before I chew your @ss out, do you have anything you wanna say?" I looked into his golden eyes.

"... Yes," his deepened voice rumbled through his chest.

He paused.

I looked around hesitantly. "Okay then, what is it?"

"

. I'm sorry," He seemed to force out.

I gazed at him.

I have to remind myself he has the mind of an entitled alpha wolf, not a man. He's not used to saying sorry.

"Thanks for apologizing," I nodded.

He blinked, "Do you forgive me?"

I thought for a second.

. Do I?

I decided to be honest. "I don't know. What are you apologizing for?"

He looked slightly taken aback by my question and broke eye contact with me. "For hurting you."

I watched him. ". . . Which time?"

His eyes snapped back up to mine.

He clearly wasn't expecting this to be this hard.

"Every time," there was a slight darkness to his tone that showed his agitation.

He's getting annoyed.

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What I'm about to say is going to be pushing it, so I tried to deliver it gently. "... One 'I'm sorry' for every time?"

He shot up from his seat. "Yes!"

I put my hands out in front of me, "Okay, calm down. I told both you and Jason we would be talking about things. That's all this is," I tried to get him to cool off.

Yep, definitely an alpha wolf.

"You said later!"

"This is later."

"Gah!" He growled, his fists clenching and unclenching.

"Hey, we're just talking," I reached out to him, but he backed away.

I made sure to chase the pain at that away immediately, he's just stressed.

"You forgave Jason!" He yelled, getting even more worked up.

"Jason has promised to make things right," I told him. "I've barely even spoken to you. You haven't promised anything, and I think we can both agree that every time we've come into contact, it hasn't been good."

"What do you mean?" He breathed heavily and started pacing.

I frowned. "What do you mean 'what do I mean'? You know what I'm talking about."

He was silent, just ran his hands through his hair in destress.

When I figured he wasn't going to speak, I prompted him further.

I need to know that nothing like what happened at my house or in the woods is ever going to happen again.

He can't just lose control, hurt me, then apologize until he does it again.

"Like when you attacked me to mark me. . ." I tilted my head to get a better view of his face, "twice."

"You said you were gonna leave me," he seemed to snap out of his trance and rush to grab my hand. He held it up to his chest.

It took me a second to realize he was talking about what I threatened right before he jumped me.

"Malaki, that's not an excuse," I tried to tell him.

"No, I just didn't want you to leave. I wanted you to be mine." He squeezed my hand tighter. I don't think he meant for it to hurt, but it did. "You're mine."

I stared at him, into the eyes of a wild wolf, and it clicked.

"So you'd do it again?"

He paused.

"Maria, you're my mate. My mark belongs on your neck, and yours mine." He panicked and brought my hand up to where my mark laid on his neck. Electricity shot through my arm, straight to my heart.

It made me sick.

I hurt him to put that there.

And he hurt me to place his.

This isn't how it's supposed to be.

"You're not sorry." I shook my head.

"I'm sorry I had to hurt you," he sounded desperate now, clenching onto my hand that's covering my mark to ensure I couldn't take it away.

My heart.

"You didn't have to do anything," I snapped and managed to yank my hand out of his grip.

His wounded puppy look cut straight through my soul, but I can't let him off this easy. I have to be strong.

"It's one thing to forgive a mistake, but it's gonna take me a little longer to forgive you for something you don't even regret," I shook my head in regret of my own.

He's lucky he's my mate.

I love him weather he hurts me to get what he wants or not, apparently.