Between Two Worlds

I open my eyes; the room is dark and not much can be seen but the faint outlines of the room’s décor. The memories of the past few months come flooding back to me. I carefully roll over, doing my best to make sure I don’t disturb the bed’s other occupant. I can hear his heavy breathing, indicating that he is lost in the world of dreams. Only this morning I awoke to find myself back in the world of lions and wild dogs. The world of Wolfe, Lou, and Altair’s threat to kill them both. Their deaths could be avoided if I simply agreed to marry him. So, I did what I had to, I agreed to marry Altair. Last month was the ceremony, a rather large ceremony, with nearly the entire city present to witness it. Turns out this city is bigger than I thought, with a population of five hundred. And now I lay next to one of the most dangerous men I have ever known. A man I am pretty sure raids other, smaller towns. A man that I know extorts other towns to make himself richer.

What was I thinking? How did I get myself into this mess? I’m married, I should be happy. I should be full of plans for the future, and full of love for my new husband. But I’m not. I mean, I don’t really know him. All I know is what I observed and what I read, and between the two of them... let’s just say I don’t want to know anymore. I do worry about the possibility that our union, earlier tonight, will produce a child. How can I raise a child with this man? A man that would force his new wife to “do her wifely duties” as he put it. And when his new wife said no, would slap her and punch her until she relented? What kind of life would any child of his have? I don’t have much control over whether or not a child is produced, but I do find myself praying to a higher power that it does not happen. For the first time in my life, I pray that I am barren. Maybe then he will decide I am useless to him and let me out of our marriage contract. But I’m sure the chances of him allowing me to escape his reach is slim to none. This is no marriage; this is a prison sentence.

I notice that the room has grown quiet, that the heavy breathing of my husband can no longer be heard. I feel him shifting in the bed and tense up as he throws an arm over my side.

“Rayanna?” Altair asks, quietly. “Are you awake?”

“Yes,” I answer, as quietly and meekly as possible. The last thing I need is to provoke another attack. I’m pretty sure he blackened one of my eyes, earlier. Not sure how he’ll explain that.

“What’s the matter? Why aren’t you asleep?” he asks. He is still calm, but I know it won’t take much to bring on another firestorm. I feel his weight shifting, again, and in a few seconds, the bedroom light is turned on, and he is sitting up in the bed.

“I don’t know. Too much on my mind, I guess.” I decide to sit up like Altair.

“What are you thinking about?”

“You, me, our marriage.”

“What of it?”

“I don’t know. Do you think it was a good idea? We don’t know each other.”

He leans in close to me, kisses my cheek, and then softly kisses my lips. “I think it was the best idea I ever had. Your brother and his kid are safe, and I get you.” He says rubbing my arm.

“Speaking of my brother. I am going over there, tomorrow.”

“What for?” he asks, his voice starting to rise.

“Just to have a little chat. Not a big deal.”

“What goes on in my house, stays in my house. Do you understand me?!” his voice has risen so much that I’m sure the guards standing outside of our house can hear every word.

“Calm down, I ...” I start to say but am cut off by Altair’s hand as it strikes my face. I knew the moment the words left my mouth I would be in trouble.

“Do NOT tell me to calm down. IF I want to get upset or angry, I will. Do you understand me?”

“Yes.” I whimper, holding a hand to my injured cheek. I have seriously got to learn to think before I speak. Maybe he won’t get as angry if I do.

“Now come here. I’m sorry I had to hit you. I just need you to understand that I am in control of everything around here, you included.”

“I understand,” I say, leaning into his open arms. The last thing I want is him touching me, but it’s late and I am in no mood for pain.

“Besides, you can’t talk to your brother right now. Didn’t he tell you? He joined the city militia. His unit is leaving first thing in the morning, and they won’t be back for several weeks.”

“What? Really? What about his daughter? What will happen to her? Where will she be?”

“I made arrangements for someone to care for her in his place. See, I’m not really a bad guy. I take care of my soldiers, of my people. Now, go back to sleep, we have a long day ahead of us, tomorrow.” He says, leaning over and turning the light out.

I have got to find a way to get away from him. I roll over to face the wall, close my eyes, and attempt to go to sleep. I feel Altair’s arm on my side once again and soon hear his snores. I’m trapped and I don’t care for this feeling at all.