Bend Me, Daddy

I shook my head with jerky movements.

Standing up, he shoved the gun back into the waistband of his pants, put his finger to his lips, and opened the door, listening for a second before stepping out. As soon as he was gone, I surged forward and shut it behind him, then backed into the farthest corner and pulled my knees up to my mutilated chest, which suddenly throbbed in pain.

Jesus, how could I have thought he'd forget about me?

The only reason I was still alive right now was because I'd made a deal with Mario the same day he'd dumped me in the woods. Terrified he would kill me, I became desperate. So when he offered me a way to be useful to him, I took it. I didn't even think about it. Anything to get the hell away from him and his manic mood swings that flew back and forth between fits of rage and sobbing confessions and everything in between.

So I agreed to be his spy. Any and all information I saw or overheard was to be reported directly to him through one of his men who would be in contact with me.

His men were everywhere, he'd assured me, and they would find me.

I was to tell them what I knew, and they would report back to Mario. However, I'd foolishly assumed that Luca's security was locked down tight and that his men were loyal. I'd assumed that Mario was out of his mind, and that once I got away from him, I would be safe.

Oh, god. I needed to tell Luca what was going on. No, no. I can't. Slapping my hands over my face, I squeezed my eyes shut, remembering what I'd agreed to, and what the consequences would be if I snitched.

Mario, the bastard, was smarter than I'd given him credit for.

He'd sworn to me that if I forgot, and happened to let anything slip to Luca about any of this, he wouldn't kill me. Oh, no. That would be too easy. In the short time we'd been together, Mario had gleaned quite a bit about me. Like how, for the majority of time I'd been with him, all I'd really wanted was to die. To remove myself from their game. To no longer be a piece on the board.

So, no. That move was too easy.

He wouldn't come after me...he would kill my parents.

He would kill Luca.

And despite everything, I knew I wouldn't be able to live with myself if that happened. I wanted to get away from him, yes, because I knew this life wasn't something I could ever accept. Because I hated him just as much as I craved him. But live in a world without him in it?

I didn't think I could do it, especially knowing I was the reason he was no longer there. I wouldn't be able to live with myself knowing I had purposefully caused someone else's death.

My breath caught on a sob, and I moved my hand over my mouth to stifle it. I couldn't let anyone hear me. If they did, Enzo would be here in a flash, demanding to know what was going on. I didn't know how long I'd be able to hide in this closet before he came looking for me anyway. Of course, I could always tell him I'd just gotten overwhelmed about leaving the only home I'd known for all of my adult life. Or I could tell him I was on my period. Or both. That should shut him up pretty quick.

But the shaking. I had to stop the shaking.

Taking a breath, and then another, I clambered onto my knees and started going through my clothes again, trying to keep my mind on anything but what had just happened. Hopefully, by the time I came out of this room, Mario's guy would be out in the truck, and I could use the ride home with Enzo to get my shit together before I saw Luca. Because I knew if he saw me like this, if he started demanding what was going on-or worse, showed concern-I would lose it. I'd completely fucking lose it.

Okay, Veda. Get your shit together.

I finished packing what clothes I wanted, and by the time I pushed the boxes out to the living room, Enzo was sitting on the floor against the wall, waiting for me, one arm on his bent knee as he rubbed the tips of his fingers together. His phone was in his other hand. All of my furniture was gone, and the kitchen cabinets were all open and empty. The only thing that was left out here were my fake plants. Even the trash was gone.

When he saw me, Enzo closed whatever he was looking at on his phone and rose to his feet. "Do you wanna keep those?" he asked, pointing his chin at the plants. His sunglasses were on top of his head, resting in his dark, spiked hair, allowing me to see his eyes. They were haunted by the things he'd seen and done in his life, but not cold. There was a speck of something there. The same something that made him so patient with me when we were training. It was the thing that made me trust him, even though he was just as scary as Luca, if not more so.

I glanced over to the breakfast nook and shook my head. "Um, no. They can go with the other stuff I don't want." I smiled at him, still a bit shaky, but there. "They're not real. I never had the time to keep a plant alive. Or a pet. Even though I've always wanted both."

With a nod of understanding, he walked over and gathered up the plants to take down to the Dumpster. "Let's go, then. I need to get you back. I'll send someone up for one of those boxes."

With one last look around, I picked up the smaller of the two and followed him out to the SUV, carefully keeping my eyes down as he ordered a couple of the others to run back inside for the other box and whatever was left in the closet. Shoving my box into the back seat, I climbed into the passenger side, leaving my door open to let some of the heat out. Not that it was much cooler outside. The summers in Texas were a bitch.

The ride back to the lake house was blessedly silent and cool, thanks to Enzo cranking the AC in the car. As soon as we got there, I grabbed my box, thanked Enzo, and, after he assured me he'd bring up the other larger box personally, I hurried upstairs to Luca's room to unpack and take a shower.

Dropping the box outside of the closet, I locked myself in the bathroom, stripped off my sweaty clothes, and got into the shower.

As soon as the water was on, the dam I'd built up around my emotions burst free. A choked sound escaped. And then another. And then I started crying with great, heaving sobs. Disoriented, I threw out my hands until I hit the tiled wall, wet from the steam of the shower, and put my back to it. My legs gave out, and I slid down to land hard on my ass, my hands coming up to cover my face as fear wracked my body so hard I couldn't breathe.