Beautiful Hue

I sit in a crowd full of entertainers next to my family: Mom and dad. Also known as Mr and Mrs. Watts and my sister Blair.

Mom and Dad are the proudest parents I’ve ever experienced. Black excellence at its finest. Dad also known around the house as pops or G-Paw. Can always be caught rocking his low taper. The man is smooth as ice cream and soft as a teddy bear. But don’t fuck with his family. Otherwise “Down the way” in him might come out on you. It’s a Cleveland thing.

Mom the light of my life with her poised posture and loving spirit taught me the game. She had aspirations of acting and today, here we are celebrating my success due to her influence and wisdom.

Together those two raised my sister and I. Blair takes after my dad but she looks just like our mother and lord knows I’ve had enough of fighting boys on the playground for even looking at the both of them. We have major shoes to fill when it comes to our parents.

Here we are. A pin drop could be heard in the room. Everyone sits in anticipation. I look to my left and then my right. Actors of the past and present sit at the edge of their seats to see who the winner of the last award will go too.

The sound of a drum rumbles over the sound system and slowly fades in the presenters open an envelope. William the studio exec of Right-foot Entertainment makes eye contact with me from across the room. We smile at one another and share a nod.

William decided to test his pin last year and he created his own film. He handpicked me to play the lead of which needed no convincing because I owe Will my life. His pitch was: “Well you want that Oscar don’t you?”

Of course I did and here we are. William’s film has received high ratings on Rotten Tomatoes and everyone seems to love my ‘heart felt’ performance.

At one point on set a scene had gotten so intense I cried through the night. The words jumped off of the page and my voice, my body and soul resonated with the words my Character was saying. I’d go as far as saying that William wrote my dream role.

As I focus on the stage. I look at the two presenters I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

In a beautiful cry. “The Academy award for Best Actor in a leading role goes too!” says Sarah, my former co-star.

She looks up and tears fill her eyes. She looks around for a needle in a haystack and screams at the top of her lungs as we make eye contact: “Benjamin Watts!”

The crowd erupts. I sink into my chair in disbelief. My mom clutches and squeezes my hand. My father stands and grabs me, planting my head into his chest. My sister reaches out and rubs my back, as tears fall down her cheeks. William walks over to me and the room begins to feel smaller.

My manager of twenty- years, Jeff pats me on the back and I snap back into reality.

“What just happened?” I ask sincerely confused.

Everyone helps me stand to my feet and I begin to drag one foot in front of the other. My chest feels heavy and I feel like I am going to pass out. But I’ll be damned if any one in this room sees me sweat. Jeff and William accompanies me to the stage. We walk down the red carpet through the thunderous applause.

As we approach the stage, cameramen follow the three of us. I’m sure that they’re catching the ugly tears that are rolling down my face, but this is my Oscar night. Nothing else matters now.

As I approach the mic, Sarah and I share a hug, followed by a kiss on the cheek. I make eye contact with some of my idols: Sidney Poitier, Jamie Foxx, Forrest Whittaker, Octavia Spencer and so many more.

I look around, I see young talent and previous cast-mates. As I grab the mic everyone stands up and a roar erupts throughout the auditorium of people.

I close my eyes and soak it all in Jeff pats my back, tears stream down my face, I feel my heart beating fast, I feel a lump in my throat and I open my eyes. I look around the room, as tears continue to fall uncontrollably.

“Thank you.” I say.

The applause continues for a few moments. I look around still taking in the moment. The crowd slowly settles. Everyone sits down. I take my position as the room settles.

“You wanna know something? It took me fifteen years to enter this building, I never felt that I belonged. As I saw all of you when we walked on that carpet earlier, I thought to myself: ‘There’s no way— the academy is going to let me join the likes of them.’ I quickly changed that thought. I began to believe that I was deserving of anything good that came my way tonight. Whether it was a connection I may receive with one of you, or just my parents expressing how proud of me they are...

…I was deserving. Right now I want to congratulate everyone that has received their Oscar tonight and all of the nominees . To anyone that’s still grinding and working towards yours. Keep attending class, keep working hard and don’t give up. To any other black boy or girl out there that doesn’t believe that they can be up here one day.

Remember this: Cliché as it may sound. If I can do it, so can you! Thank you to the academy and thank you to the wonderful studio of ‘Right-foot Entertainment.’ Jeff… thank you for believing in me when I was just getting starting in this business. You all have been a huge blessing in my life and to my cast mates, I appreciate you all so much. Thank you.”

As I wave into the crowd, everyone quickly cheers, screams, cries and roots for me. Jeff, myself and William walk backstage with Sarah and her co- presenter, Charles. As we enter backstage, the aroma of food from catering fill the air.

“We need to make sure, we keep everyone organized as we depart!”one of the workers say to another.

“Some of the Actors want to leave now tell valet to get ready!” I overhear in another conversation.

“Vanity Fair better be ready.” someone else says, as we walk-by.

Everyone roams around backstage like their heads are cut off.

“Mr. Washington, how do you feel about getting your Oscar tonight? What emotions are going through your body?”an interviewer asks John David-Washington.

He holds his award high, joining the likes of his father: Denzel Washington. I continue to follow Sarah until we reach a wall plastered with an ‘Oscars 2020’ logo.

“Can you stand in front of that camera please?” one of the event coordinators ask me.

“Go ahead.” Sarah says.

“We’ll be right here.” Jeff and William say in unison.

I walk to the wall, as six photographers line up along a red velvet divide. The flash of the first camera momentarily dilates my eyes. As the second camera goes off I stand nervously I blink as the flash goes off. The third camera goes off and I begin to calm down, the other cameras flash and I cheese. Emotions fill my heart, as I look at my Oscar.

“One more.” Another photographer says.

“One second,” I say to the photographer, “hey—Jeff. Can someone go and grab my family for me?” I ask.

“I’m on it.” Jeff responds. He quickly walks out of backstage and into to the crowd.

As the door opens, the faint voice of a comedian is heard in the back.

“Who’s that?” I ask Sarah.

“No clue.” she answers trying to listen.

I turn back to the photographer I stand holding my Oscar out in my hands. The camera flashes again, my eyes settle getting used to the bright light.

“My baby!” screams my mother, holding her arms out to hug me.

I walk to her and place my head on her shoulders. Tears rush down my face and my father joins us. As I embrace my parents I make eye contact with my sister. I release my parents, Blair and I share a long embrace.

“Crazy isn’t it?” I ask her.

“You better had won, it was the best movie to come out this year.” Blair says.

My family, Jeff and William join me for the last picture. The camera flashes, immortalizing this moment. Placing me with some of the greatest actors in Hollywood.

“Are you going to celebrate tonight?” Blair asks, as we walk away from the wall.

“I think I’m just going to take the night and drive around. Enjoy the night, you know?”

“You should at least go to Vanity Fair. Show your face a little.” Jeff suggests.

“Yeah son, go have fun tonight.” my father says.

I make eye contact with my mother and she insists with her eyes. Implying that I should go.

“Alright. I’ll go.” I say, as everyone claps. “Y’all are real funny.”

“We’ll walk with you to the exit.” William says.

The group and I walk through backstage passing the hectic workers and excited guests.

“Congratulations Ben!” Someone yells from behind us.

As we walk through the exit, we run into John. He and I shake hands and praise one another.

“Hey, congratulations tonight man, you deserve that!” I say to him.

“My guy, same to you Ben. We worked way too hard for this!” He says back to me.

Valet arrives with his car and he walks around to the driver side.

“I’ll see you at Vanity, B! Have a good night Sarah!” He yells, as he enters his car.

Blair shivers, as a cold rush of air blows past her.

“I thought California, was supposed to be hot all of the time.” She says.

“Well, we need to have you here more often.” Sarah responds, as her car approaches. “This is me. I’ll see you soon Ben.” I give her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. I open her rear door she sits behind the passenger seat. Her chauffeur walks out of the shadows and enters the driver seat.

“Get her home safe.” I say to her driver. “she’s valuable.” I say, as I give her a wink.

“Have a goodnight Ben.” She says smiling at me.

“You too.”

I close her door and her driver exits the parking structure.

“So are you guys staying in the hotel, or coming back to my place?” I ask my mom and dad.

“You’re going to Vanity Fair and we are going back to the hotel.”my dad says.

“Dad.”

“Nope. No questions about it.” My dad says, as their car arrives.

“I love you Ben.” Blair says, as she walks closer to me for a hug.

“I love you too.”

I hug my mom, then my dad and open Blair’s door.

“Drive safe.” I say to them.

“We will Ben. Have fun tonight and don’t worry about us. We’ll meet with you for lunch before our flight tomorrow.”

My dad drives off, as another valet approaches with my ride.

“Benjamin wait!” William yells before I enter my car. “I forgot, I got you a briefcase for your trophy, here, put it in this.”

“William, thank you man. For everything.”

“Thank you for agreeing to do the movie. I really appreciate it Ben.”

“Of course. It was an amazing experience.” I open the case and place the trophy inside. “Perfect fit.”

“I had it sized.” He says.

“Are you proposing to me right now?” I joke.

“Only if you’ll say yes.” William says joking back to me, as we share a laugh.

“Bring it in man.” I say to William with open arms.

We hug one another and I get into my car. I watch William go back into the building through my rearview mirror, I pull out of the parking garage and I turn onto Hollywood Boulevard.

Before I can leave the parking structure, I am immediately met by traffic and blocked off streets. A policeman directing traffic approaches my car. As he gets closer, I roll my windows down.

“Hey officer.”

“Hey, Benjamin Watts right?” He asks.

“Yes sir.”

“Congratulations tonight brotha. You and John made everyone proud.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Which way are you headed?”

I take a moment to think about it. I look at my trophy briefcase.

“I’m going to go home. Bel - Air.”

“Alright, let me direct you down Sunset. It’ll be a straight shot from there.”

The officer walks in the middle of the street and motions for me to follow him. As he stops traffic I blow my horn to say thank you and I make a right on to Sunset.

* * * *

I drive down Sunset in my Solid black, Model S Tesla my trophy sits inside of a case in my passenger seat. Traffic is light and the night is calm, but I can still feel my heart racing from the thrilling event.

I drive with my windows down in silence and reflect on the night. I drive through the Bel-Air gate and swerve up the mountains to my home. I approach the front gate of my mansion. I input the code and travel up my long driveway. As I pull into the garage, I park next to my motorcycle, exit the car with my trophy case in my hand and walk into the house.

I turn on the lights in my kitchen, sit at the counter and remove my trophy.

“There you are.” I say as I stare at it for a moment and bow my head.

“Thank you Heavenly Father, for blessing me with this gift. I couldn’t do it without you.” I pray with my head in my hands.

My phone rings and I take it out of my pocket. I see Sarah’s name on the caller ID.

“Everything alright?” I answer.

“Yeah. Um, everything’s fine.” She says hesitantly. “Where are you?”

“I’m at home.” I answer.

“You didn’t go out to celebrate?”

“Nah, I needed some quiet time, it’s been a long day.”

“Well, neither did I.”

“So you’re home?” I ask.

“I was. I’m at your front gate now.”

I stand up with the phone up to my ear and I walk to my front door to look at the cameras. I see Sarah standing at the gate waving into the camera, with a bottle of wine in her hand.

“You’re one crazy white girl, you know that?” I ask.

“You want to let me in?” she yells through the phone.

I enter the code to disable my alarms, I open the gate and walk out of the front door to meet her half way. As I walk down the stairs of my porch, the only sounds that could be heard are: the crickets, the wind whistling and the leaves on the trees brushing against one another.

I hang up my phone and walk through my yard to meet with Sarah. I see her shielding her eyes, as my automatic lights suddenly shine along the front lawn.

“Shit. Why didn’t you just use your golf cart to pick me up?” She asks, as we get closer to one another.

“I don’t have one.”

“With a driveway like this, you need one.”

“I’ll put that on my list of ‘Things Sarah says I need.’ How’s that sound?”

“Real funny Benjamin.” she says, as I turn around.

Sarah follows me back through the yard, to the house. As we walk up the stairs, Sarah slips and catches her fall.

“Drunk already?” I ask as I laugh and grab her hand at the same time.

“Not even close. Your steps are just ridiculous.” she says.

“Sure.”

We both enter my house and take our shoes off.

“Are my slippers still here?”

“You’re here too often.” I say to her. I walk to the closet across from the front door and I grab her slippers.

“Your pool is better than mine.” she says, as she snatches them out of my hands.

She places them onto the floor and slides her feet into them, then follows me to the kitchen. I walk to my wine rack and I grab two wine glasses.

“Do you still have those marshmallows.”

“Always!”

“Good!”

She walks to the fridge, pulls out a bag of marshmallows and places them on the counter, then she walks over to the cabinets as I watch her, she pulls out a box of graham crackers and Hershey kisses.

“You are over here way too often.” I say to her, as I shake my head.

“I know what I want and just where to get it.” she says, as we walk out of the kitchen.

I hold the backdoor open for her and she walks out onto the patio. The automatic lights turn on, as we walk closer to the fire pit. I sit our glasses down, as she gets comfortable on one of the large patio chairs. She tears open the bag with her teeth, as I look at her concerned. I sit in a chair next to her and slowly recline back.

“You savage.”

She shrugs and rolls her eyes, then smiles as she twirls around.

“Want to crack open that bottle of wine?” she asks desperately.

“Someone’s thirsty huh?” I ask, as I open the bottle with a corkscrew.

I pour each of us a glass of wine and place the bottle on a side table next to me. We clink our glasses together for a toast and we each take a sip.

“Do you remember the first time we met in acting class?” she asks.

“The time when I thought I knew what I was doing and the teacher embarrassed me in front of everyone? Not at all.”

“You were a deer in headlights, when he said that we had to do a scene together.”

“I remember that you couldn’t stop checking me out.” I say to her.

“That’s a lie! But you tried so hard to be cool.”

“I had to do a scene with the finest girl in the class, of course I was nervous.” I say, as we both laugh.

“Then you decided that your character wanted to kiss mine, in the middle of an argument! We were strangers arguing in a grocery store.”

“Alright, I’ll admit. I might’ve had the wrong type of acting in mind, when I did that.”

We both laugh and take another sip of our wine.

“You won an Oscar today, Benny,” she says, as she sits forward, placing her empty wine glass down. I pour her another drink and she builds each of us s’mores. “When I saw your name. Ben, my heart dropped.”

“When I saw you look into the crowd, for some reason I knew you were looking for me.”

“Everything just froze. I’m so proud of you.”

“We both know that you helped me get better.”

“But you listened.”

We roast our s’mores in the fire and sit in silence as the fire crackles. We remove our s’mores, we both take a bite and I watch the chocolate drip from her s’more down her hand, as I indulge in my treat.

“Shit,” she says, as she licks most of it off, before it drips onto her clothes.

“I’ll be right back.” I say, as I get up to grab her a napkin from the kitchen.

I walk inside. I quickly grab a napkin and a plate. I walk back onto the patio and she places her s’more on to the plate.

“Clumsy, clumsy. Don’t tell me that wine got to you already.” I say jokingly.

She laughs, as she sits her dirty napkin on the table next to her.

“Maybe it did. So, what’s next?” She asks, as I sit back in my chair.

I take a moment to think. “I don’t know honestly, I guess it’s just, repeat what I’ve already done now.”

“I hear that it actually gets harder from here.” she says, as she takes another bite of her s’more.

“I hear that too. Could it really get any worse than how we started? I mean we were broke when we first started this.”

“That’s true. But you aren’t worried about the expectations?”

“Not really.” I say, as I take another sip of my wine. “I’m just going to keep doing what I’ve been doing. In the end that’s what being successful really is right? Just repeating the process that made you successful in the first place.”

“I guess it is,” she says before sipping her second glass of wine.

“How’s shooting going for you?” I ask.

“It’s fine, I wish I had another co-star I could lay my lips on.” she says smiling at me.

We both laugh and take another bite of our s’mores.

I look out into the darkness and enjoy the silence.

“I’m thinking about taking a break for a while.” I say abruptly.

“A break? I think you should take this momentum and do at least one more film.” she suggests.

“I thought of that, on my way here actually. The thing is, I’ve spent all of this time, trying to focus on my career, after me and Kennedy. I think I’m ready to be open to the idea of dating again.” I say.

“Leave it to the tabloids, they’d say that you’ve already found your match.” she says.

“Hm... TMZ, the professional match makers. Didn’t they try saying that we were together once?” I ask, knowingly playing as if I didn’t know the answer.

“Turned out to be a picture from set. Got me into a lot of trouble with my ex.”

“You didn’t need him anyways. He held your performances back.”

“Maybe,” she says, as she takes takes another sip of her drink.

Sarah and I finish our drinks. Then our s’mores. She wipes her hand on another napkin. We sit around the warmth of the fire. The sound of crickets cut through the silence. I glance at her in admiration, I take out my phone and I play music. I stand up and grab her hand. She stands up smiling. We slow dance, as the fire burns.

“What are you doing?” she asks.

“This is my kind of celebration.” I say to her.

We dance and she places her head into my chest. I feel her moving closer to my body, I cup the back of her head in my hands. We rock from left to right, to the beat of the music. She lifts her head and looks up to me. I look into her eyes.

“Ben.”

“Yes?”

“I should be heading back next door. I have to get up early for set in a couple of hours.”

“Of course. Thanks for the wine and everything you’ve done to help me get here.”

“Of course, superstar,” she says, as she pulls me tighter. “You deserve it.”

Sarah and I slow dance until the end of the song. As the song comes to a close we both clean up the patio, grab our glasses, we go inside and sit everything on the counter.

We walk to the front door and put on our shoes, we exit the front door in silence, as we walk through the yard.

“It was a beautiful night,” she says, as we walk to the front gate.

“It was. Thank you, for coming over with the wine again.” I reply.

“Thank you for having the snacks all of the time.”

As Sarah and I approach the front gate, she punches in the code and the gate opens right up.

“I forgot you knew that.” I say to her surprised. “I’ll walk you closer to your house.

As we approach her house we share a hug.

“Thank you, Ben,” she says, as she kisses my cheek.

I kiss the back of her hand.

“You’re welcome, Sarah.” She smiles and walks away.

I watch her get on to the other side of her gate and she waves goodbye to me. I turn and walk back to my house with a fulfilled heart to prepare for bed.