Balance (Book 9 )

I opened my eyes to complete darkness. I touched my eyes to see if they were indeed open.

I could not be blind. My task is not over!

I was lying on my back. I turned in the direction I knew the windows would be. Even at night, I should see some details. I breathed deep, taking in the scents of the room. Frankincense and myrrh were strong scents. A hint of honey was mixed in.

I sat up to get out of bed then paused to get my bearings. The silence is deafening, and the darkness is terrifying. I can feel tears forming in my eyes. I took a deep breath and blinked them back. There was no reason to be upset. I am still alive. There is hope I will survive this.

I stood up, and my legs weakened and failed me. The wooden floor knocked my breath out of my lungs, and my determination to fight wavered. I tried getting up, but my legs were very weak, and my arms did not have enough strength to pull me back onto the bed. I sat on the floor and leaned on the bed, staring at nothing. Tears of frustration and despair rolled freely down my cheeks.

A breeze of honey came to me, and the ground vibrated all around me. Someone is close by. I will not allow the intruder to take advantage of my weakness. I will defend myself the best I can.

I grabbed the bed and tried to pull myself up. My muscles screamed at the strain. Powerful arms grabbed me. I felt air escape my lungs as I struggled to free myself. The arms held me tight as a hand forced my face into the skin. I attempted to bite and claw my way out of the embrace. It was useless. I am too weak. The strong arms finally won, and my face met the flesh of someone’s neck. Anubis’s unique honey aroma filled me as I breathed in his scent.

I inhaled his scent deeper and relaxed in his arms. Anubis held me to him for a long time. He simply stood where he had picked me up from the floor and buried his head in the crook of my neck. If not for the beating of his heart in his chest, I would not know I was held by my husband. He could have been a pillar I was shackled to.

I wish I knew how he is feeling. The silence is unbearable. I feel I have returned to the empty shell I was thrust into on my birth as a goddess. Atum killed my mortal body and thrust my consciousness into the jackal body Anubis is holding. Everything I once was, was lost. I was no longer connected to my vampire mate. I woke up blind, and the world seemed too loud for my sensitive ears.

I needed the safety my husband provides. I wish to feel his love and hear his thoughts. I wish to feel his body on mine as we love one another. Above all, I wish to hear the deep rumble of his voice and feel the safety and the comfort of his arms. I wish for this nightmare to end.

I must not lose hope. I must fight until my last breath. I slowly rubbed Anubis’s bare chest with my hand. Images of his body flashed like shadows in my mind. I broke free of his embrace and began touching him. Anubis supported me and stood still while I learned how to see.

I raised my hand and tenderly felt his ears. His body shivered at my touch. I could faintly see the outline of his ears and the golden earrings he wore. I traced his forehead down to his snout. The shape of his face came to me. If I could have smiled, I would. I felt my lips part.

Anubis’s body vibrated, and I grew concerned. I could not tell if it was laughter or sobbing. I have only seen him cry once, and that was the day he revealed himself to me. I caressed his cheeks and found them to be dry. He had laughed at me. He laughed at me the day I tried to smile. I smiled again. I like to feel his vibrations.

As I continued my tour of his body, his muscular frame came into my vision. My body hummed with desire, and my heart leaped with joy. I yearned for his special touch. I wanted his skin on mine. My hand slid down to his passion. I caressed it, making it come into my vision then began messaged him. His body vibrated again, and his hand lightly gripped my wrist.

I paused and allowed the touch. Something flashed in my mind. It is as if I heard him. I took his neck and chest in my hands. I brought the image of Lara to my mind and transformed into her image.

“Speak.” I mouthed. I was unsure if my voice could form words right, but I knew my lips and tongue.

His body vibrated again. He continued speaking different words. They came to me like music. Different vibrations formed different images in my mind, like music notes, but different. My mind began organizing the vibrations into patterns.

Anput. I understood the word. I smiled as I became excited at the possibility of talking to Anubis. Each word came to me in a different sequence of patterns.

Do. I concentrated on each vibration, willing them to reveal themselves. Anubis slowed the words down so I could learn them.

Anput, do you understand?

“Yes!” I felt the air escape from my lungs. I began laughing and crying. My body shook with joy. His hand held my hand to his chest.

I love you.

It took time to understand the words. It is not like him to use the human term to express his love. He simplified his words to convey his thoughts.

To know he cared for me enough to speak his thoughts and share his love for me, warmed my heart. I kissed his cheek in response. I took his hand and looked for the bed. He helped me to it. I padded the mattress, indicating I wanted him to sit with me. The bed shook, and Anubis put my hands on his neck and chest. I knew my tongue would work. I had to try to speak.

“Anubis,” I breathed. I was not sure if I whispered or spoke the word. I concentrated on my body and rested a hand on the base of my neck. I hummed until I could feel vibrations through my body. Then I focused on how my voice felt to my body.

“Anubis.” I felt the word come out. His hand touched mine indicating he could hear me.

“Why am I blind?” His hand left, and the bed shook. “Do not leave!” I panicked and felt around the bed for his body. “Anubis?” He did not answer.

I could still smell him. He was in the room. He must be in too much pain to speak. I patiently waited until he returned to me. Begging was unbecoming of a goddess. No amount of pleading will force Anubis to respond. He knows my desire. I must only wait for him.

The bed shook once again, and his hand went to mine, putting them where I could read him. His massive chest rumbled as he spoke each word slowly. He paused in between his words so that I may understand him. I spent an hour watching the vibrations dance around me and deciphering their meanings.

“Your task is complete. The world has been brought to its knees.”

“How?”

“It is done. That is all you need to know.”

“We still had half the continents.”

“You have been asleep for a year.” I yanked my hands back as if I got burned. Anger flared in my veins. Anubis gently reached for me.

“NO!” I screamed.

I jumped out of bed and fell. I needed my staff. I began reaching out and sweeping my hands along the ground, desperately searching for my staff. The ground vibrated, and Anubis’s arms wrapped around me. I began to struggle to get away from him.

“No!” I yelled again.

I put all my force in my lungs. I was unsure how loud my voice was; however, I wished for him to know I was not accepting what he said.

His body vibrated as he tried to speak to me. His arms tightened their hold around me. I tried to growl and bite him.

My task cannot be done! A year is gone!

The vibrations of his body became more intense and I saw Stop.

The little strength I had seemed to pour from my body. I panted for air and relaxed in his arms. I could not help the sobs. The pain I felt was unbearable. This was my task to complete. It is almost time for my soul to depart. Anubis held me until I could get my composure.

A year of my life is gone. As an immortal being, a year is simply another day or another minute. I am mortal. A year is a precious thing. I have missed an entire year of my family’s love.

I could no longer feel or hear my husband’s thoughts. The isolation is worse than being deaf. I somehow had to fight. This must be corrected.

Anubis continued to hold me tightly against him. His chest rumbled from unrecognizable words. It soothed the pain I felt, and I was able to gain my composure.

“Mum?” The last time I spoke to her, she battled her belief in the gods. She worried for my sanity. I treated her poorly and never got the chance to ensure her safety.

“She lives and serves Ra.”

I felt comforted by that. If the world is safe and the gods will live, then I must concentrate on breaking the death knights contract. I cannot change the past.

“Please help me find Adrestia and my staff. I wish to go to our tree.” I replied. I felt numb inside. It is as if my struggle is for naught. Nothing I can do will change my circumstances, yet I cannot help but fight for my life.

Anubis released me from his grasp then returned a moment later with both my weapons. I realized they would compete for my connection to them. Adrestia is simply a tool. Its magic does not activate until the blades are separated. I must use Life to help me battle death’s embrace.

“I need a sheath.”

Anubis found one Adrestia would fit in and strapped it to my back. Once Adrestia was sheathed, I called the spear’s power and leaned on it for support. The room became alive. The staff has the ability to magnify its wielder’s surroundings allowing the wielder to see the tiniest detail. My legs are still weak, and I could not see, but my sense of smell, and my sensitivity to sound magnified. I could see shadows of everything in the room. I knew exactly where Anubis stood, and I knew exactly where to strike him dead. I began walking around the room. Anubis took one step. “Stop.” I commanded and continued. I traveled flawlessly without tripping or bumping into anything. I felt vibrations crawl along the floor that came from where Anubis stood. I turned and looked at him. The vibrations slowed, forming words. It was as if an invisible hand wrote symbols on the floor.

“Can you see?”

“No. I cannot see with my eyes. With the staff is magnifying everything. I can feel vibrations. Each item is unique. Like my land in the western world, I can feel everything.” I walked to him and touched his chest. I love the feel of his hardened body and the warmth he expels.

“Can we go to our tree?”

“Not until you tell me why.”

“First, I need fresh air. Second, I believe Life can help cast death’s grip from me.”

“A death knights’ contract cannot be broken by anyone other than the one who created it. It is a blood oath.”

“An oath I did not agree to.”

“An oath you invoked. You may not have known about it or knew what you were doing, but it is an oath.”

“I refuse to believe that. There has to be away.” I growled. My anger began to grow demanding release. “If you will not help me, then I will figure it out on my own.” I tried to teleport out of the room and could not.

“Release me!” I demanded.

“My mate, please allow me to fight for you. You are not alone. It is my duty and privilege to protect you. You are my wife, and you are to defer to me.”

He is right. I made a vow to never defy him again. I had to allow him to do what must be done and trust he will not let me down.

“I have been hard at work since you met the death knight. I have an idea, but you will not like it.”

“What is it?”

“The death knight Kyle belongs to me. It is a secret I am not to speak of to anyone, including you.”

“It is plain to see he follows you. That is no surprise.”

“The remainder of them belongs to my father. It is his symbol you see on Kyle’s chest. The jackals are in a civil war. Most of them no longer have their medallions. Only three gods other than you and I have access to the jackals. Osiris, Set, and Kebachet.”

He paused for a moment. The floor moved and groaned as Anubis traveled to his desk. I followed him and sat in a chair near the desk. Whatever he found out was not easy for him to say.

“Did you not destroy those who are not loyal to you?” I asked to break the silence.

“They are loyal to me. Someone controls their actions just as you have command of my most trusted. They are finding it hard to trust one another. Squabbles about how to best protect the souls are rising into battles. There is nothing I can do to prevent their destruction at this time.”

“You are their god. Can you not simply instruct them? Give them a purpose?”

“I am not concerned with their welfare at the moment. Their torment will end soon enough. There is another matter that is more important.”

I am surprised to hear him say such a thing. The jackals and the souls are his responsibility, and he takes that responsibility very seriously. Perhaps it is not Anubis who sits in front of me. Perhaps it is the imposture.

I stood and began sniffing the air around me. Everything seemed as it should be. There are no scents that should not be here. I began walking toward the door. I will go to Anubis’s throne and demand his appearance.

Anubis’s hand reached out and gripped my arm. “Where are you going?”

“Nowhere that concerns you.”

“You are my wife. Everything you do concerns me.”

Anger surged into my veins. How dare this imposture think he can claim me? I yanked my arm out of his hold and turned out of the door. Before I could take my third step, the imposture gripped my shoulders and forced me to turn around.

“Do not disrespect me, Anput.”

I did not want him to know of my suspicions. He could become violent. I hoped to bring him to Anubis. I wondered where my husband was. It is not like him to leave me unattended for so long.

I embraced my enemy and pushed my body into his suggestively while I summoned my power. His arms encircled me as he accepted my embrace. I must be quick. I continued holding him to me until I was ready. The imposture did not move. He allowed me to hold him. His nose moved to the crook of my neck. As he inhaled my scent, I pulsed my power and grabbed Adrestia from its sheath then moved it between us. Its edge bit deep into the imposture’s belly. I could feel blood flow onto my hand as the blade ran across his flesh.

The ground shook from the imposture’s howl. I watched as Anubis’s form fell to the ground. I raised Adrestia for the final blow. His head will look lovely on Anubis’s wall.

Strong, sharp vibrations echoed all around me, telling me to stop.

“You have deceived me for the last time!” I yelled as I thrust Adrestia down.

In the blink of an eye a stick materialized in Anubis’s outstretched hand and blocked my strike. I kicked him in the wound then repositioned for the killing blow. He howled and moved quickly to avoid my strike. My muscles would not work. It took too long to adjust to his movements. Adrestia missed my target and impaled into the floor.

Anubis grabbed me from behind and covered my mouth with his hand. His hand is sticky with blood that smelt of honey. Could this truly be my husband? I relaxed my tension, and Anubis’s gripped softened. I took his wrist and bit deep to taste fresh blood. This is truly my husband.

“By the gods, I am sorry, husband!”

Anubis stumbled toward the bed and sat on the edge. He will heal though it will take time. I went to him to comfort him.

“I had forgotten about the imposture. Worry no more, wife.”

“You found him?”

“I believe so.”

“Who is it?”

“Anput, I do not know how to say this without upsetting you. Believe me. I do not wish to believe it to be true. Promise me you will remain calm and keep quiet. I am prepared to fight you if you need release.”

His words insulted me. My sanity is intact. He forgets my vow to submit to him. “Spit it out, Anubis.”

“Mind your tongue, Anput!” The vibration was strong. I flinched under the power of his tone. “You must promise me to not speak of this and do not interfere with my investigations.”

I got up to retrieve a basin and towel to clean the wound I inflicted. It worried me he would take precautions. There is something he suspects would cause me to react without thought. The only thing I will fight blindly for is my family and my life.

“I give you my word, husband.” I said with respect as I began to wash his wound. It has already begun to heal.

“Osiris is a gentle God. He is quiet and only listened to the dead that walks in bardo. My father and mother have been in another realm enjoying each other’s company and torturing the living there. That leaves Kebachet. When I questioned him, he admitted to stealing the medallions. He has not told me why or where he has hidden them. It is also my belief he commands the death knights.”

“Kebachet betrayed us? That cannot be! What have you done to him?”

“You do not need to know.”

I stood from the bed “He is my son!” I yelled.

“He is my son!” The vibrations were strong, and the shadow of Anubis grew as he stood.

“Forgive me, husband. This must be hard on you too. What does he know of me?”

“I have not spoken of you and he has not asked.”

“Can I see him? Perhaps he will speak to me.”

Anubis was quiet for a moment as he looked at me. I did not shy away from him.

“I will bring him to the throne room. Do you require help getting there?”

“No. I will wait for you.”