SWNOVELS Bad Intentions: Chapter 25
My biology homework took longer than usual because I was distracted. The weekend had been full of Eve and work and more homework. Then Monday was a blur of a pop quiz and catching glimpses of Cayden in the hall. Oh, and the dreams. Every single night I’d dreamed of him, and now, they were only more detailed.
Most of all, I was distracted by the email that had landed in my inbox bright and early this morning. Early admission into my dream school and an invitation to an exclusive summer program, in California.
It was an even better offer than I’d dreamed of. Oddly, my first feeling when I’d read it had been disappointment and a healthy dose of anxiety. What that said about me was clear. Even when my dreams came true, I’d find something to worry about. In this case, however, I had a lot of reasons to worry, and every single one came back to the two people standing in the kitchen when I entered for dinner later.
Cayden was setting the table. There seemed to be a black cloud over his head, and he didn’t meet my eyes as I joined in laying out the flat wear. My father was tense; I could tell by the fact that he’d already popped a beer. Usually, he saved drinking for the weekends or after a victory.
“You want one, Cade?” he offered.
“Eric!” My mother scolded.
I was shocked by the offer. My dad was hardly someone who encouraged underage drinking, but it went to show how he had different rules for his team than for me.
“What harm is it going to do? One beer…I think we all deserve one after today.”
My ears perked up. “Does that include me?” I teased my dad.
The tension in the room was heavy.
He pinched my cheek on the way past. “No way, Lil.”
“Unfair.”
I became aware of a hot feeling on the side of my face and turned toward it. Cayden looked away before our eyes could meet.
“I’m good, Coach. I’m not much of a drinker,” he said quietly.
“You’re a better man than me,” my father continued and sat.
I helped my mom carry the serving plates over to the table and sat across from Cayden. “So, what happened today that was so terrible?”
“Let’s not talk about it at dinner, okay? Let’s just enjoy our meal,” my mom said firmly, squashing any further questions.
We ate in uncomfortable silence. I felt Cayden’s eyes on me time and again, but when I looked at him, he glanced away. It was starting to make me nervous, considering the last time I’d seen him, he’d kissed me on the forehead outside the diner while his cum was still damp on my thighs. Was this what guys were like after sex, or was it something else?
Wait, did he know about California? No, it couldn’t be. How could he? My thoughts whirred through my brain, desperately trying to puzzle out his odd behavior. If he did know, why would he be acting like this? If wasn’t like he really cared where I went to college. The only thing he cared about was the leverage that the secret gave him over me. I’d thought we were past that after the other night. I’d thought we didn’t need to threaten each other anymore. A lump lodged in my chest. I ate sparingly and left the table as soon as I could.
Cayden stayed behind, helping to tidy like he always did. I hung about in the hallway outside his room. His shadow slid along the wall toward me before I saw him. He stopped as soon as he saw me.
“What do you want?” His cold question hurt a little after what we’d shared.
“I just wanted to talk to you. Am I not allowed to?” I was aiming for bright and breezy with my voice but failing miserably.
He was quiet for a moment. “I don’t have anything to say to you.” He made to push past me.
“Cayden, stop,” I reached out and grabbed his arm.
He stilled, looking down at the place where our skin touched.
“What’s going on with you? I thought after the other night…I thought we’d made peace.”
“Are you really asking me that?” His voice was cold.
He towered over me, and his anger seemed to wrap around us both, stealing my breath.
“I don’t understand.” I took a deep breath and tried to face my fears. “Did you find out about me getting into California?” It was a long shot, but I couldn’t think of anything else that had changed between us.
He stared at me, not answering.
“Why do you care where I go to college?” I pressed. My heart was beating hard, a foolish kind of excitement running through my veins. After the other night, my first time, all these tendrils of feeling kept leaving me and latching out toward Cayden. I couldn’t help it. I was getting attached. It was so predictable. Now, my heart was looking for any sign that he cared about me further than the other night. My first time. Our first time.
“I mean, it’s not like we’re really friends,” I trailed off. My fishing for some kind of reciprocal emotion from him wasn’t going well. I was acting awkward as hell, and if the floor decided to swallow me up at that moment, I wouldn’t have minded.
Cayden was silent for a painful second. “What are you playing at, Lily? What do you want from me?” He sighed, sliding his hand over his short dark hair, battling for control.
“I-I don’t know,” I admitted. More, the voice in my head whispered. Everything.
“I’ve got homework to do,” he said dismissively and moved toward the door of his room.
“Are you – will we talk again tonight?” I asked, breathless. Suddenly, the thought of him sleeping next door, upset about something while I wasn’t able to help seemed unbearable.
He just stared at me.
“You could – come and see me, later, when my parents are asleep,” I offered.
He remained silent, until my blood rushed to my face, embarrassing me. “Whatever. Come, don’t come, it’s up to you.”
With that, I turned on my heel and scurried toward my room.
I dreamed of him again. His dark shape filling the doorway and then sliding into my bed. He was naked, and his hot skin scorched mine.
Since we’d been together, my dreams had taken on such a feeling of reality, it didn’t dawn on me that it wasn’t just in my head until his hand closed over my throat.
I tried to sit up, the dream falling away, but that palm kept me pinned to the mattress.
Cayden tutted in my ear. “Where do you think you’re going? You invited me, remember?”
I moaned as his weight settled on me. He’d tugged my shorts down while I was sleeping. I was wet. I didn’t know if it was from the dream or if he’d already been touching me. Whichever it was, I was more than ready for him to be inside me. My skin was burning up, sizzling in every place he touched. He was so strong, his body kept me immobile as he lined himself up and sank inside me, his hand still gripping my throat. It hurt. The stretch was immense, and I whimpered. He captured my mouth in a kiss, stealing the sound.
He pushed inside me, not stopping until he was deep. My muscles spasmed around him, trying to force out his invasion for a moment before going slack. He rested there, sheathed to the hilt, his head lying on the pillow beside mine. I should have felt crushed by him, it should have been scary, but it wasn’t. I liked it. It was every dark fantasy I’d ever had come to life. No choices, no escape, just the man I cared about, taking everything he wanted from me. I wasn’t a bad daughter or a slutty puck bunny. I wasn’t any of the things my mother worried I would become. I simply had no choice.
I wrapped my arms around him and held him to me, lifting my hips to squeeze him more as the pain faded. A growl rumbled deep in his chest as he moved.
He slid out of me in a long, fluid draw, and then plunged back in. I gasped, and his free hand clamped down over my mouth.
“Not a fucking sound, unless you want your dad to walk in here and see you getting fucked,” he warned quietly in my ear.
I protested against his hand, but he didn’t remove it. Of course he didn’t. He’d read my journal after all; he knew just how much I liked to imagine his rough touch. He fucked me hard, keeping me pinned by the throat the entire time. He stared down at me in the dark when I came, pushed over the edge far too quickly by his touch. He pressed my throat tighter, restricting my breathing. Stars exploded before my eyes, and I clamped down hard on him. I couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. I fell endlessly through pleasure, not trying to push him off or move his hand even once. I felt him watching me, even as my face turned hot and my lungs burned. When he finally let go, I gasped for air, filling my shocked body with much-needed oxygen. The whole thing had only made me come even harder.
“How can you let me do that? How can you trust me after what you’ve done?” His deep voice seemed to be coming from far away.
In that floating place where he’d sent me, I couldn’t make sense of his quiet words. He was still hard inside me, and I rotated my hips against him, tugging him back toward me. He resisted, keeping his distance, even while his cock was still buried deep.
“I guess I just trust you not to hurt me, no matter what,” I murmured, stroking my fingers down his bare arms and over his back.
When I touched the scar tissue, he tensed. With a grunt, he pulled out, and the sudden loss was jarring.
I tried to sit up, confused why he hadn’t kept going. He hadn’t come yet. He yanked me back down and pushed me to my front. My breath left me again as he parted my legs roughly and draped himself over my back, his cock sliding right back inside me from behind. His hand clamped down over my mouth again, smothering my cry as he penetrated me from a different angle. This one was so much deeper.
“I’m not done with you yet, Lillian,” he murmured in my ear before sitting up.
His weight left my back as he straddled my thighs and fucked me prone. Grabbing an old bunny toy that was near my pillow, a sentimental remnant of childhood, he stuffed it into my mouth, gagging me with the well-loved plush.
“Now it’s my turn to take whatever I fucking want from you,” he muttered and caught my wrists with a huge hand, holding them at the small of my back while his other hand seized a handful of my hair and tilted my head back.
The position made me arch my back to keep my hair from pulling too tight, and he only slid deeper. I moaned wildly against the toy in my mouth. It was nearly too much. All the points of pain warred with the pleasure building inside me.
“You love this, don’t you, Bug? You love being used like a fuck toy,” Cayden’s voice was low and harsh. His hips snapped against mine, drilling in ruthlessly deep.
Bug? I had to have heard wrong. He never called me Bug.
Yes, I do love it. I love it. Thankfully, the stuffy in my mouth stopped me from begging him out loud.
His deep voice turned me inside out.
“My fuck toy, to do whatever I want with. Do you imagine other guys fucking you like this? Asher? Beckett? Maybe both of them at once? Do you fantasize about them covering you in cum and sending you home to Daddy?”
The toy fell from my mouth as I came again. I tensed, and Cayden growled low in his throat as my pussy tightened all around him.
“No,” I panted, lost in sensation. “I only fantasize about you. Just you.”
“Fuck!” He spat and let my hands go to grab my ass cheeks, his fingers sinking into the fleshy globes as he came inside me.
His cock pulsed inside my channel, and the hot, wet feeling only made my orgasm stronger.
“Fuck, you milk me so well. This cunt was made to take my cock and hold my cum,” he muttered.
I trembled beneath him, my body awash with liquid pleasure. He took a moment, catching his breath, his cock still sunk deep, before he pulled out and shifted his weight off the bed. I twisted my head to watch him as he stood. He was leaving already? He stared down at me in the dark for a long moment. I could feel his cum welling out of me and dripping down my inside thigh. I’d have to be the one who washed these sheets so my mom didn’t get suspicious. He reached for the covers and pulled them up over my lower half. He stretched down and pushed the covers in around the sides, sealing me up.
Then he turned and left me there, full of him, spent and panting, tucked in like a good girl.