Back & Forth | Book 1 of Back & Forth Series

The incessant shaking of my shoulder wakes me up from my sleep. I hear my name being said repeatedly as the shaking continues. The only thing I do to respond to the annoying situation is pushing the hand off me and roll away from whoever the hell it is.

Dude, leave me alone. I’m still sleeping. Go away.

As my awareness grows stronger, I begin to remember what has happened.

Shit. I’m really kidnapped. I’m in fucking Italy because I’ve been kidnapped by some mafiosi. I’m here because my father has three million dollars debt to an Italian mafia boss. Fuck my life.

“If you don’t wake up now, your life will be a living hell.”

“A living hell? My life is already a living hell,” I respond with my eyes closed.

Seriously though. My life has been a chaotic mess ever since I was a child. It has been a living hell my entire life. Try living as an unwanted child. You’ll know how it feels like.

“Wake up. Alessandro wants to talk to you,” Luciano says.

What the fuck does he want from me? There’s nothing else to talk about. He’s only wasting his time by trying to get my father to pay his debt. Just rip the fucking band-aid off already and sell me or put me into the auction. Whatever the hell he prefers.

My eyes stay shut when I hear Luciano sighs. The memory of what happened last night makes my eyes snap open. It was indeed one of the craziest shit I’ve ever witnessed in my whole life. Now, the scene has been ingrained in my brain, forever haunting me. What a horrible night to have two functioning eyes.

I push myself to sit, turning around and frowning at Luciano as the images of Alessandro and the woman repeat themselves in my head.

“Did you know what happened last night? Alessandro barged into this room while making out with someone. They almost fuck on top of me,” I explain.

The possibilities of what might’ve happened last night flood my mind. Not one good situation comes up. Just imagine accidentally ending up in an unwanted threesome. That would be one hell of an awkward night. Thank goodness God is merciful enough to not let me go through that.

Luciano only stares at me. Genuine confusion is playing on his face as he digests my words. A laughter bursts out of him now that he realises what I’m talking about.

“That would be such an experience,” Luciano says. He’s definitely entertained by the image in his head. The amusement on his face says it all.

“The most unforgettable one,” I say.

It indeed would be one hell of an experience. I’d rather eat glass than go through that. I hope Alessandro will remember that he puts me in this room and won’t cause any tomfoolery like he did last night.

“Oh anyway, here are some new clothes for today, and pretty much everything you need for hygiene. You might want to get ready before you see Alessandro,” Luciano says. He hands me two paper bags, one has clothes in it and the other one has what I need to clean myself. I’m suddenly reminded why I’m here as I look at Luciano again. Being in disbelief is such an understatement. My life has taken me to an absolutely weird place.

Why am I being directed to this route? Why do I go through this? Haven’t I suffered enough by being my parents’ daughter? Go really work in such a weird, mysterious way. What a great time to be alive.

“Why is my life like this?” I mutter to myself as I get on my feet.

“This will pass. Soon enough, you’ll live normally again,” Luciano says. I stand in front of him and give him a blank look.

Normal? My life has never been normal.

“If the normal you mean is going back to my father, I’d rather drown myself in the bathtub later,” I say. A frown appears on Luciano’s face. It’s telling me that what I’ve said is depressing, to say the least, and outright pitiful.

“Allura, stop joking like that,” Luciano says.

Me? Joking about death? Never. I’m always ready for it. Let it come. I’ll probably cry in joy when the angel of death finally arrives. It’s just a matter of time until God is tired enough about my complaints and prayers for death. Until then, I’m just going to live my life on autopilot without purpose.

“I’m not joking. I’m serious. I just haven’t find enough courage to take my own life,” I say.

“That’s a good enough reason for staying alive. You’re scared to die for a reason-“

“I’m not scared of death. I just don’t want to take my own life. It’s different. If the opportunity comes, I’ll gladly give up my life,” I say.

“I know this is going to sound weird but if you need someone to talk to, you have me. Even after you get back. You can have my phone number for it,” Luciano says.

Ha. Here we go again. Another person who pretends to care. The saviour complex is real on this one. Will he just shut the fuck up already? This is getting boring.

“What makes you think I’ll be alive by then? I’d rather get hit by a car then going back with my father. And what makes you think I won’t report you to the police for kidnapping if I ever get back?” I ask.

“You just said it yourself. You haven’t had the courage to kill yourself. For the other question, if anyone tries to investigate your kidnapping, someone higher up will interfere. They might end up missing or dead,” Luciano says.

“Ah. Didn’t expect that from a mafioso,” I say as I roll my eyes.

“What makes you even think we’re mafiosi?” Luciano asks.

“Well, you abducted me and smuggled me out of the country with a fucking private jet. I know you’ve bribed some people so you can fly me out of the country. My country is pretty well known for its corrupt government and officials so, I know it’s easy for people like you with lots of money to be above law,” I explain.

“That’s a good explanation,” Luciano says.

“I’ve learned about this kind of things before. It’s not really rocket science,” I say with a shrug. Luciano check his watch and then sighs when he notices the time.

“Let’s not stall any longer. You better be ready in an hour. I’ll be back to escort you to the boss’s office,” Luciano says.

An hour? That’s still a long time to go! Why is he waking me up now? He should’ve woken me up half an hour before I need to see Alessandro. Now that I know I still have one more hour, I’d rather go back to sleep. It’s not like I’ll take long to get ready, probably 20 minutes max. I’m just going to go to sleep for 30 more minutes.

“Fine. Now leave. I’m going to spend half of it going back to sleep,” I say. I put the bags by the nightstand and get back on the bed. Luciano scowls at me, his previous display of sadness has disappeared.

“Don’t you dare go back to sleep. Your jet lag won’t let you wake up on time even if you want to,” Luciano says.

“Whatever. I don’t care. Alessandro can come here, scold me, and make my life a living hell if he wants to,” I say. With my head on the pillow, I finally close my eyes and ignore the man standing behind me.

“I’ve warned you. Don’t regret it,” Luciano says.

“I won’t,” I say.

“Fine.”

Luciano’s footstep retreat from me. The sound of the door being closed brings a sigh of relief.

What is up with that man? One minute he’s trying to save me from my suicidal thoughts and the next minute he’s threatening me again. How confusing. Whatever. I’m going to go back to sleep. I don’t care if Alessandro is going to drag me out of the room by the hair. He can also beat me up if he wants to. At least I’ll feel something other than numbness.

My eyes snap open. I whirl to the clock and check the time. 7.34. I’m not sure how long I’ve slept because I didn’t check the time before I went back to sleep. I better get myself ready now. Who knows Luciano will come back in any minute now.

With the bathroom still steaming with water vapour, I put on the white t-shirt and a pair of white sweatpants from the bag. With my eyes on the mirror, I wipe off the mirror and stare at my own reflection. Now that my tangles have been brushed, I fold my clothes and leave the room.

My eyes wander around the bedroom as I step out of it. Luciano is nowhere to be found. Perhaps it’s not the time for him to pick me up yet. The clock shows that it’s currently 7.46.

See? It didn’t take me long to get ready. I guess for the time being, I’m going to lie on the bed again and maybe go back to sleep.

It’s been minutes. I can’t go back to sleep. My body is anticipating for the meeting with Alessandro. What else is he going to say? Is he going to tell me who’s going to buy me?

My gaze shifts to the door at the same time Luciano opens it. I guess I can say he’s pretty surprised that I’ve cleaned up and dressed in the new clothes.

“Let’s go,” Luciano says.

“Wait a minute.”

I go to my socks and shoes and quickly put on them on. I get back on both of my feet after I finish tying the shoes.

We go through the hallway and downstairs. Within a couple minutes, we finally reach the door to Alessandro’s office. I step into the room once Luciano opens the door for me.

My eyes observe the room. It’s still the same dark room. The difference is, the dark ebony desk is now full with stacks of papers and a laptop. Alessandro is already there, seemingly busy with the paperwork while sitting in his office chair with a perfect posture. Sometimes I don’t understand how people can sit that straight. I could never. My back and neck hurt after seconds of doing it.

Alessandro looks up at me, his expression grim. He stares back at me as if nothing happened last night. It seems like he doesn’t give a fuck about it.

That’s odd. He was so cocky last night about it. What’s the change of personality?

“Sit,” Alessandro orders. I do as he says, not wanting to waste any more time in this room. He slides a paper in front of me while keeping his gaze on the paperwork in front of him.

What the fuck is this?

I take the paper and see a table and a list. A table of schedule and list of rules. I scan the paper and see there’s a set time for each three meals of the day.

What is this for? Is this for me? Why?

“Last night I’ve told you about the reason you’re here. I’ve given your father a week to pay his debt starting from yesterday. Until now, he hasn’t paid it yet. Not even a penny. Now, he only has six days to do it. If he fails to complete the payment, I’ll be selling you. It won’t be enough to pay everything but it’ll be sufficient,” Alessandro says. The way he says it makes it sound like he’s selling goddamn lemonade.

Am I really that worthless? Am I nothing but an object now? It’s nothing that I don’t expect someone to say to me, to be honest.

“Are you telling me I’m the one who’s going to lay off his debt somehow?” I ask.

“Yes,” Alessandro says.

“How convenient,” I scoff. I let my back slam into the chair as I cross my arms over my chest. Alessandro continues to stare at me coldly.

“After you’re sold in the auction, I won’t have any responsibility of you anymore. The person who wins the bid on you can do whatever he wants with you,” Alessandro says.

Well, duh.

“Yeah. Figured,” I say as I roll my eyes.

“While you’re living in here, you have to follow my rules and this schedule,” Alessandro says as he taps on the schedule paper.

“Why?” I ask.

“So you’ll be in a good condition when I sell you, of course,” Alessandro says.

I check the schedule again. Other than the daily meals, I also need to take a shower at least once a day, drink two litres of water a day, take vitamins, jog or exercise at least fifteen minutes a day, and there’s even a sleep schedule. I barely do almost everything in the list everyday for years. How does he expect me to follow all these rules and schedules? I don’t think doing all these will affect me that much anyway. One week is such a short time for getting a significant result from a lifestyle change.

“Do I really have to follow the schedule and rules? Like everything?” I ask.

“Yes. You’ll have someone watching over you to make sure you’re doing everything,” Alessandro says.

Gosh. This is so tiring. Whatever. I’m too lazy to fight him. I’ll do everything on the schedule.

On the schedule, I can see the breakfast starts at 8 o’clock. The big, antique clock shows that it’s almost time for breakfast.

“So, I have to eat my breakfast in a few minutes?” I ask. Alessandro nods in confirmation.

“Yes. You’re going to eat your breakfast in the dining room, not in your room,” Alessandro says.

“Okay,” I say.

“You can leave now. Luciano will take you to the dining room,” Alessandro says.

“Alright.”

I fold the schedule and shove it into my sweatpants pocket as I walk to the door. When the door opens, I immediately find Luciano.

“Follow me,” Luciano says.

We walk to the other side of the house. In the dining room, I see some men already seated at the table, occupying almost half of the table.

Who are these guys? They look like they’re important. It’s from how they look. It’s like they have this air of authority. They all look like they’re in their fifties or older. Im not sure about one of them though. He has his back facing me. Do they live here? That’s the only reason they can be here this early.

Luciano leads me to the table. He sits in the chair next to the empty end of the table.

“You can sit here,” Luciano says as he points at the empty chair on his right. Next to the chair, a man already sits in there. I hesitantly take the seat between the two men. With nothing but nervousness, I glance at the man on my right. At the same time, we stare at each other and I quickly look away once I see the firm look on his face.

My eyes wander around the table. All the men seem to be pondering about me. Questions probably already fill their heads. Nothing complicated, just the basics. They perhaps only revolve around who I am and what I’m doing here.

My gaze shifts to the other end of the table and my eyebrows knit at the sight of Alessandro sitting there.

Wait, what? Alessandro was still in the office when Luciano brings me here. Did Alessandro teleport himself here?

My eyes move towards the entrance of the dining room. Alessandro enters the room with his usual rigid expression.

What? There’s two Alessandros this whole time? Alessandro actually has a twin? Oh my God. Now I get it. The one who got into my room last night must’ve been Alessandro’s twin. I can see it from how different they present themselves. Personality wise, Alessandro is more serious, cold, and rigid while his twin is more smug and carefree.

All the men on the table rise to their feet, welcoming Alessandro into the room. I awkwardly do the same thing. Once Alessandro gets in his seat next to Luciano, everyone sits back in their chairs.

I take a quick glance at Alessandro’s twin. He’s already smirking at me as he sees the realisation on my face. I roll my eyes at him and stare at the table.

“Any guess of who Alessandro’s twin’s name might be?” Luciano asks. A cocky smirk still stays on display on the twin’s face as I look at him. Within a second, a name pops up in my head.

“It’s Alessio,” I respond.

“How the fu-“ Luciano cuts his words off before saying the f-word profanity. It’s very obvious that he’s surprised by my guess.

“You’re right. He’s Alessio,” Luciano says.

This is seriously creeping me out. How did I get everyone’s names, except Niccolo, correctly on first guess? This is weird. I guess I can call myself a psychic if this keeps happening in the future.

“Luciano, stop talking. Let her eat her breakfast,” Alessandro says.

I look down at the table and see there’s been a plate of scrambled eggs, toast, and sausage in front of me all this time.

“Did you hear that? She got Alessio’s name right on first guess. She also did it with your name when we were on the plane without even seeing you before,” Luciano explains. He takes a glance of suspicion at my way and then turns to Alessandro again.

“Lei è strana. A nostra insaputa, potrebbe sapere qualcos’altro su di noi,” Luciano says.

(She's strange. Without our knowledge, she probably knows something else about us.)

Did he just call me strange?

Alessandro looks at me. His expression is unreadable behind the cold façade.

“Guess the names of the other men in here,” Alessandro says.

Everyone already has their eyes set on me. Their gazes suddenly make me feel nervous. It feels like my mind is short-circuiting under their watch.

Shit. Okay. Calm down, Allura. You got this. You’ve done this before so you can absolutely do it now.

I turn and look and the man on my right.

Salvo. His name is Salvo.

“He’s Salvo,” I say. The man only stares at me. Not even reacting to my guess in the slightest.

“Correct,” Alessandro says.

Fuck me. I’m right again. Okay. Let’s see the other man.

My body starts to tremble out of nervousness. I stare at the man next to Salvo and a new name pops into my mind.

“That’s Fabrizio,” I guess.

What is Alessandro going to do to me if I get everyone’s name right? I don’t want to imagine it now.

“He’s Mario,” I say as I gesture at the man between Fabrizio and Alessio. Amusement gleams in his eyes at my guess. I think I got his name correctly as well.

“You’re right. Last one,” Alessandro says. I look at the man sitting next to him and within a second, another name enters my thought.

“He’s Martino,” I say. My gaze turns to Alessandro again. Now he’s staring back at me, almost scrutinising.

Shit. This is so scary.

“You also guessed his name right,” Alessandro says.

Everyone stays silent while they watch me like I’m a circus. Alessandro’s gaze doesn’t leave me as he contemplates something in his mind.

“How did you do that?” Alessandro asks.

“I’m just guessing. I swear to God I don’t do anything,” I say in panic.

Shit. I’m so fucked. I’m done. Alessandro definitely thinks I know something I shouldn’t when in reality I don’t. I’ve never seen these men before. My father never told me anything about them.

“Did your father say anything else about us?” Alessandro asks, his eyes are filled with scepticism.

“No. I’ve told you my father hates me. He never told me about anything, not even his favourite colour! What makes you think he’ll tell me something like this? You’ve stalked me for months. You should’ve known about that. Maybe I’m secretly a psychic this whole time. Who knows,” I explain.

Alessandro’s eyebrows quirk at my explanation. The firm look on his face has been replaced with curiosity and interest.

How could I even know about these people? About whatever they’re doing? I barely talk with my father even if it’s only for a few seconds. How could I know any of this when he doesn’t even talk to me?

Shit. I’m definitely in trouble. How further away can I get into this problem? This sucks. I don’t fucking care if they’re going to kill me. What I’m worried about is if they’re going to torture me to death just to get something out of my mouth. Like in the movies. I’ve suffered enough in life. I don’t want to suffer more.

“Non mi fido di lei,” Luciano says to Alessandro. What he says makes me frown. It’s clear to me that he doesn’t trust me. I can see it from the look of suspicion on his face. Not like it should matter to me anyway.

(I don’t trust her.)

After long silence between us all, I let out a defeated sigh.

“You know what? That’s your choice to believe me or not. Do whatever you want to me. I’m not going to waste any more minutes to explain and defend myself anymore,” I say with a shrug.

I look at my untouched breakfast. My appetite has long gone. With a frown on my face, I push the food around the plate as everyone stays in silence.

“Finish your breakfast. You’re coming with me to my office,” Alessandro says.

Fuck. I’m definitely in trouble. I hope nothing terrible other than death will happen to me later. One can only wish.