Awake At Dawn (Wildflower Series Book 2)

“WINONA!”

Noah’s loud, booming voice jerked me awake.

I wasn’t sure I’d ever heard Noah yell before, and it startled me so much that I threw the covers off and bolted to my bedroom door…only to find a scene that had me holding in laughter.

Winnie, covered in what looked like flour, ran in circles around Noah as he tried to catch her before she spread more mess in the kitchen. It was a lost cause, though. The counters and floor looked as though they had been through a snowstorm.

When Noah finally snatched Winnie up, he stood and visibly stumbled back at seeing me in the doorway to my room. His eyes on mine, dancing with unspoken words, brought me back to last night.

When he’d heard me orgasming loudly while I imagined things I had no right imagining.

When he’d told me to go back to my room.

When he’d had a tent in his pants that I tried not to think about because of how big it was.

Oh hell.

My cheeks, I could feel them heating up. And the ache…the ache between my legs that I’d tried to assuage last night was returning.

Noah was the first to clear his throat.

“I’m sorry for waking you. I was…” His eyes wandered around the kitchen before he let out a heavy sigh. “I was trying to make you pancakes. To make up for…” I waited, wondering if he would come right out and say it, but finally, he just said, “Last night.”

Yeah…last night.

He went on without further elaboration. Not that it was needed.

“But Winnie jumped up and tugged on the towel beneath the bowl of pancake mix like it was one of her rope toys, and, well…”

Another deep sigh fell from his lips as he gave a hopeless perusal around the kitchen.

Despite the tension rolling in my gut, I smiled.

“You didn’t have to do that, Noah.”

“I also, uh…” He scratched the back of his head, ignoring my comment. “Bought you flowers.” Noah gestured to a vase filled with tiger lilies on the kitchen counter, sitting safely away from the pancake mess. “I don’t know if you’re a flower girl, but I saw these when I was out getting the pancake ingredients and picked them up.”

I bit my bottom lip, trying to keep my grin from growing even more and giving away how he was making my insides turn to mush.

“For the record,” I said when I got a hold of myself. “I am a flower girl. I’m not good at growing them or keeping them alive like Juniper is, but they’re pretty, and I like looking at them.”

“Yeah.” Noah blinked without looking away from me. “Pretty.”

“Thank you for getting them.” Fuck, I hoped the heat in my cheeks wasn’t too noticeable.

“You’re welcome. We should maybe put the vase somewhere away from Winnie, though. She’s been getting into everything, and I haven’t had a chance to research what plants are dog safe.”

“Good idea,” I said before repeating, “Thank you, Noah. You didn’t need to do that.”

I didn’t want him to think I was mad. I was embarrassed, flustered, and unsure how to act, but I wasn’t mad. Noah didn’t seem like the type of person who would try to sneak up on me. He probably assumed I would be sleeping when he got home.

Little did he know that I couldn’t sleep. Sleeping alone in his apartment was weird, and I absolutely hated it. Sure enough, his arrival home last night chased away my restlessness. Even with my embarrassment, I’d returned to my room and fallen into a deep sleep that only Noah’s bellowing had been able to break through.

Speaking of…

“Winona?” I questioned, leaning against the doorframe. “I didn’t know this princess pup had a full name.”

“I named Winnie after the town my parents met in,” Noah explained before looking down at his dog covered in pancake mix.

My heart squeezed. Noah didn’t talk about his family much, and I so badly wanted to ask a follow-up question and dig a little deeper, but given his expression, I doubted he was in the mood.

“At least it was just the dry ingredients,” I offered up.

Noah nodded, but he didn’t look consoled. So with a deep breath, I foraged into the snowstorm and held my hands out for him to hand over the puppy.

“Here, let me go clean her up.”

As though coming to the reluctant conclusion that nothing would salvage his surprise, Noah nodded and handed Winnie over to me.

“If you bring her into the bathroom, I’ll grab her dog shampoo,” he said. “Just don’t let her go. She’ll run right out. She’s a menace in the bathtub, so we’ll have to do it together.”

My pulse ticked up at the notion of being in such a confined space with Noah, especially after last night. But I needed to get over it if we were going to continue to live together. This was as good a way as any to do it.

Just dive right in.

To the bathtub.

I didn’t think that I would literally have to get into the bathtub, but I soon learned that Noah wasn’t kidding when he said that Winnie was a menace to bathe. In order to keep her from escaping, I had to squat behind the soaked dog in the tub, holding her from both sides so that Noah could scrub shampoo all over her silky golden coat.

It would have been fine if it weren’t for Noah’s fingers brushing over mine as we worked together in silence. It made it impossible to trick my mind into thinking that the heat in my body was from the warm, sudsy water covering my legs.

It had nothing to do with the water. All I could concentrate on were his hands, letting my mind wander to places it shouldn’t be. The result? Feeling jealous of a goddamn puppy. I bet Noah London knew just the way to work those hands, knew just the right places to put them, knew just the right pressure to use.

Shit.

Maybe I shouldn’t have gone back into my room last night.

Maybe I should have walked right across the kitchen, just to see what he would have done—what he might have let me do to ease the tent in his pants.

As Noah rubbed Winnie down, she seemed to accept her fate, her body relaxing beneath my fingers. Enough that I loosened my grip.

That had been my first mistake.

My second mistake was to use my body to block her when she attempted to escape over the side of the tub, meaning it wasn’t just my legs that were wet anymore. It was the entire front side of my body.

“That was close,” I laughed as I plopped Winnie back into the center of the tub and tightened my hold again.

When Noah didn’t say a word in response, I looked up to find him unsmiling. Not a lick of amusement surfaced on his face. In fact, his jaw clenched, ticking in an almost angry way that made me frown. Was he mad at Winnie? Was he mad that I almost let her escape to trail soap all over his fancy penthouse apartment? That didn’t really seem like Noah, but maybe⁠—

“Gemma.” His voice came out hoarse as he jerked his eyes away from me. “Christ, Gemma.”

“What?” My laugh was more tangled in confusion this time, feeling hurt from whatever had caused the intensity in his eyes. Plus, Noah had stopped washing Winnie, focusing instead on grabbing a towel from the rack behind him.

“Your top,” he rasped, throwing the towel at me.

“What?” I repeated, my half-smile fading.

“It’s white,” he said tightly, his nostrils flaring. “And wet. And fuck⁠—”

He interrupted himself, ducking his head as he stared at Winnie. Meanwhile, I clutched the towel to my chest with one hand while keeping the other on top of Winnie to hold her in place.

Noah wasn’t mad. And hell, after last night, I should have realized what was happening sooner. Something warmed in my chest as realization bloomed. And I had to admit…I kinda liked it.

Noah London, notorious playboy and star NFL player, was struggling to maintain composure…because of me?

I draped the towel over my shoulder, clearing my throat. I’d try to keep the towel there for his sake, but personally, I didn’t care. He could stare if he wanted to. I was sure it would only make the heat in my veins grow hotter, and it felt so good as it was.

“Is it just because of last night?” I dared to ask when I found my voice.

Noah’s abrupt laugh was rough, lacking humor. “Are you asking if I just noticed you’re an attractive woman because I heard you come last night?”

“Yes,” I admitted, pushing through the embarrassment of the question because, as a matter of fact, that was exactly what I was curious about. “That’s what I’m asking.”

“Em, you’ve got to be kidding me with that,” Noah groaned without lifting his eyes from Winnie. He had the showerhead in his hands now, using it to rinse her coat, and I found myself wishing he’d use that showerhead on me, too.

Oh my God, I was a mess.

But I might as well embrace it.

“Fine, then,” I huffed before tossing the towel onto the bathroom floor. If he wanted to make me suffer, I could do it right back.

Noah lifted his head to see what I was doing, and I could tell he immediately regretted it. He bit back a groan, pressing his lips shut as his eyes drifted lower. I could feel them like a hot caress on the curves of my breasts, which my shirt clung to even more now that I’d pressed the towel against me. Seeing as I didn’t sleep with a bra last night, my pajama top stuck to my bare skin, and this time, Noah was unashamedly eating it up.

“I’ve always fucking known,” he finally said, voice husky as he forced his eyes to my face. Then he scooped up the towel from the floor and tossed it back at me. “But I’m also trying to ignore it.”

I gulped, wanting desperately to shuck the towel again and see what might happen. But Noah seemed tortured enough, and I didn’t want to make it worse for him.

I bit down on a smile and wrapped the towel tighter around me.

Okay, so there was attraction between us.

It felt good to have that finally established and know it wasn’t just something in my head.

But Noah didn’t want to acknowledge it, and there must be a reason. It was likely that it overcomplicated things, and Noah was an uncomplicated guy.

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. I suspected that Noah wanted to be uncomplicated, though. And acknowledging the heat that transferred between every little touch of his fingers and mine would definitely hinder that for him.

So I sighed and resigned myself to helping him finish rinsing Winnie. And when she was clean enough that he could scoop her into his arms, wrapped in a towel like a baby, he nodded at me as I stood in the tub, watching him.

“Thank you for your help,” he said, his voice scratchy. “I’m sorry that…I’m sorry about everything.”

I shook my head. “You don’t need to apologize, Noah.”

He pursed his lips like he didn’t entirely agree with that.

“Can I still make you pancakes before I have to head to the gym?”

Something told me that making me pancakes would make Noah feel better, so I nodded.

“I love pancakes.”

“Good.”

He smiled before striding out of the bathroom with Winnie in his arms. Each step he took away from me caused me to sink further into a feeling I didn’t fully understand. I should be relieved to put a little distance between us, to break away from whatever was happening in that bathtub.

But relief was definitely not the feeling coursing through me.

And I didn’t know what the hell to make of that.

When I opened the door to let Natalie into Noah’s apartment the following weekend, she was looking back down the hall behind her with a frown on her face.

“Is that neighbor always so prickly?” she muttered as she turned toward me.

“Summer?” I wrinkled my nose, stepping back to let Natalie into the apartment. “Prickly is a lot nicer of a word than I would use.”

“Every time I pass her, she glares at me.”

I nodded, unsurprised. “I’m sure she thinks you’re another one of Noah’s conquests, and she’s jealous it isn’t her. Noah said he rejected her, and she’s been a terror ever since.”

Natalie made a gagging noise. “Please never say the words ‘Noah’s conquests’ in my presence ever again.”

“Sorry,” I laughed. “My best friend talks about my brother in suggestive terms all the time, and it makes me want to invest in a good pair of earplugs, so I should know better.”

“Oh God.” Natalie walked past me, dropping her purse on the countertop in Noah’s kitchen. “I am so sorry.”

“It’s okay.” I shrugged. “I basically forced them to realize they’re in love with each other, so I only have myself to blame anyway.”

She cocked her head to the side, a smile playing on her lips. “That’s kind of adorable.”

“Disgustingly so,” I agreed before sighing and pointing to the couch, where Chloe was passed out, buried in a pile of blankets and pillows. “She fell asleep while we were watching Noah’s game. Don’t tell him she missed his quarterback sneak. She was really fighting to stay awake but eventually gave in sometime in the fourth quarter.”

Natalie’s eyes softened as they landed on her daughter. “She loves her uncle so much. I’m glad she has him to look up to, especially considering how absent her dad is. But I wish…” She shook her head. “I shouldn’t have to rely on Noah, or you, so much.”

My stomach turned as I thought about my own son or daughter and the people I might have to rely on because they wouldn’t have a dad in their life. I knew Julian would be an amazing uncle, but he’d have his own kids soon. And the last thing I wanted was to become a burden for someone who had already spent his entire life sacrificing things for me and the rest of my sisters.

I blinked sudden tears out of my eyes, determined not to let Natalie notice what her words had brought on.

“I’m always happy to hang out with Chloe,” I said reassuringly. “It’s nice to have company, especially on nights when Noah is gone. It’s a big penthouse for just me and Winnie.”

“Thank you,” Natalie whispered as she nodded, her eyes still on Chloe. But I knew that it wasn’t really about me. “Thank you so much. I’m sorry to get sappy, but I appreciate it more than you know.”

“I’m okay with sappy,” I said, my throat a little tight. All the pregnancy hormones meant that seeing Natalie get emotional was making me emotional. I’d always felt a connection with Natalie because of our circumstances, but tonight, it felt stronger than normal.

“You know…” Natalie started thoughtfully. “As much pain as her dad brought me and as hard as it is to be a single mom, if I could go back in time, I’d still marry him just to divorce him down the road. Because he gave me her.”

She turned, looking at me directly as she murmured the last words, and I instinctively palmed my stomach. Natalie looked down but didn’t look surprised. I’d never talked to her outright about being pregnant, but either Noah told her, or somehow she must have guessed. I didn’t mind. In fact, there was something comforting about Natalie knowing. It wasn’t the same as my own sisters knowing, but it was a start.

She gave me a soft smile, her eyes flicking back to mine. They weren’t quite as green as Noah’s, but they were equally stunning. “Sometimes it’s hard to remember, but the only thing that really does matter is that Chloe’s loved by so many people. And we’ve never, ever been alone.”

Her words were about Chloe, but she said them to me.

I smoothed my hand over my belly.

She said them to us.

To me and the little one inside me, who I was going to get to see for the first time soon. Really soon.

My first ultrasound appointment was this week, and a mix of excitement and anxiety swirled within me.

This baby was going to be so loved.

And I couldn’t wait to get my first glimpse of them.