At Dawn, in the Forest

Dawn sat as stiff as a wooden plank on the couch of the living room of the packhouse. She started at the floor intensely. She tried to come up with anything to say when or if her family would be standing right there, on the spot she is looking at. She had no idea what to say after being kidnapped for over nine years. What did a person say? She was incredibly nervous.

It was when Dawn heard a car coming up and voices outside she got out of her trance. For no apparent reason she stood up. Her heartbeat beat faster and faster. She could feel it through her chest, almost as if her heart would jump out. The voices shifted from outside to the front door to close to the living room.

This is it, Dawn thought. Any moment now and her family would walk around the corner, seeing her. Seeing her standing in another packhouse, in a grand living room that was still too small for Dawn. There wouldn’t be enough space for her emotions and fears. There wouldn’t be enough room for all of them, she would have to stand too close to them, her family, she desperately wanted to see over the last nine years, but right then wanted to run away from.

Her heartbeat got louder as the footsteps neared.

Everything went in slow motion.

First Dawn saw Mateo, then followed by a man she assumed to be her father. It was hard to tell, the only thing that gave away that he was indeed her father was his scent. Her eyes watered. The scent, it gave her a sense of coming home. Then Aiden, Larisa, and her mother. She knew that was Rue next to Larisa. The thick brown locks, the green eyes, the pointy nose, rosy cheeks, everything was still the same as nine years ago. Then Caspian, Finn, and… somebody new. Dawn didn’t recognize the child that was holding Finn’s hand. It gave her an odd feeling.

And then everything went fast.

Dawn was engulfed in a big hug from her mother and her father followed suit. It felt suffocating. She couldn’t breathe. She felt paralyzed. When they finally had let her go, her two brothers embraced her. It was with less force than from her parents, still it felt uncomfortable. Dawn didn’t know how to react, she kept standing there, even when they had let go of her.

“Oh, thank the Moon Goddess, thank her indeed,” Rue had embraced her daughter again. “Darling, how about we give her some space?” Dawn’s father opted. Still she had no idea what his name was, and slowly she came to the realization why she had forgotten about her father so quickly.

The realization was heartbreaking. He had a strong resemblance with Dr. Willow. He had light blue eyes as well, but in a slightly warmer tone. He had also darker hair on his head that slowly faded in a lighter colour to his beard, even his facial features were quite similar. The two biggest differences were that her father didn’t have a protruding stomach and was more muscular.

Rue wiped her tears away and signaled the child to come to her, holding her hand. “We want you to meet someone. This is your younger brother, Elias. Say hello, Elias.” The two siblings looked at each other wearily. They were completely strangers to one another and Dawn couldn’t help but feel resentment towards him. Why, she didn’t know.

Elias said a small hello but quickly found refuge behind his mother. Dawn couldn’t respond. The words didn’t want to roll over her tongue. Her voice stuck in her throat. She looked at Aiden for help who in return nodded toward Larisa.

“How about we all sit down? I will get some beverages and snacks,” Larisa announced. Everybody followed her suggestion and Dawn was finally able to sit back down. They all looked at her, making her more nervous than she already was.

“I-I can’t believe you are sitting in front of us, look how much you have grown…” Rue was the only one who could talk. “You are now… it must be twenty-one right? Oh my goodness, we have missed so much,” And she kept talking. Dawn still didn’t know how to respond than to look stoic at the ground and from time to time she let her eyes wondering over her family members and Aiden.

Finally, Dawn’s father made the rambling of Rue stop. After a short silence, he turned fully to his daughter, “How are you…my little monkey?” The endearment made Dawn shiver, again there was a similarity with Dr. Willow, but hearing the nickname gave a comfortable sense of warmth in her chest. Still unsure what to do, Dawn looked at Aiden for help. He gave a small nod to encourage her.

“Uhm… I-I am fine?” Her reply sounded more like a question than an answer. Luckily she was interrupted by Larisa, who had come with a big tray full of coffee, tea, soda and snacks (with the help of Mateo). She made sure everybody got something and sat down as well.

“I am so happy we were able to find you two, Alpha Boaz and Alpha Rue, to bring you to your daughter after nine years,” Larisa started talking. Upon hearing that Dawn’s parents were Alphas she was surprised. Another detail she had forgotten. “It must have been terrifying, losing your daughter like that, not knowing where she was.” Rue nodded her head and responded, “The worst thing was not knowing if she was alive.” Another set of tears run down Rue’s cheeks, Boaz – finally Dawn knew her father’s name again – held his mate’s hand, offering support.

Dawn didn’t understand what she was seeing. Why was her mother being comforted? It was her who was kidnapped, it was her who endured huge amounts of pain, it was her who was actually terrified. She feared for her own life, for fuck’s sake. Why was no one holding her hand, drying her tears?

“And the hope was the worst. Hoping she would turn up someday and with each day it grew smaller but never went away.”

Dawn slowly tuned the conversation out. She looked outside, to the trees again, her only comfort. She didn’t know for how long she sat like that, but she paid attention again when her mother started to cry more and said something that struck her wrong. “At a certain point, we couldn’t continue living anymore, we had to find some closure… we held a funeral. It was the only way to-to move on…” Dawn’s eyes widened in shock.

“Well that explains a thing or two,” Larisa muttered and Mateo nodded along. “When we looked at the missing file cases we saw one that showed similarities with Dawn, but it said the person in questions was deceased and on your family register as well, so we didn’t know for sure if Dawn was your daughter.

Dawn was stunned. Her family, her own flesh and blood had given up on looking for her and told the world she was dead. They had stopped searching for her. They left her to rot in that horrible place. Maybe if they had searched more or longer she would have been found earlier. Maybe if they didn’t declare her dead somebody else might have found her sooner. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Different scenario’s went through her head what could have happened in her favor if they didn’t tell everybody she died.

“Honestly it was Elias who pulled us through it. A new life, it gives so much hope again and after we had lost it we needed it desperately.” Dawn didn’t know where the audacity had come from, to say this in front of her daughter she was just a moment ago crying over. The worst thing, everybody was nodding along and supporting Rue.

Dawn couldn’t hold her tongue anymore. “When?”

All heads snapped her way. “What do you mean?” Rue asked.

“When did this happen? When did you have this funeral?” Venom laced in Dawn’s tone.

Rue had no idea how upset her daughter was and answered calmly, “A couple of months after Elias was born so… about a year and a half after you were gone.”

Dawn scoffed. So for seven and a half years, she had to endure the worst torture you could imagine and her family was just moving on, her little brother replacing her, forgetting she ever existed.

Fury roared inside Dawn’s body. She stood up and furiously whispered, “Fuck you all.” Aiden noticed the switch in emotions and stood up as well, to form a barrier between Dawn and her family.

And then, all hell broke loose.

“Fuck you all! FUCK YOU ALL!” Dawn breathed heavily. “While they took me apart, while they shot me up with silver and wolfsbane you were happily playing family! I waited for you! I waited for you to come and get me!” Tears were now falling down on Dawn’s cheeks. “I fucking prayed for you to come and rescue me. I WAS IN SO MUCH PAIN!”

Dawn kept pointing her finger at her parents, stepping forward with every sentence. Until she got too close and Aiden held her back. “Do you wanna know what they did to me?” More tears and now an empty laugh echoed through the living room, making everybody uneasy. “DO YOU WANNA KNOW?!” She roared. Her eyes spit fire.

Larisa took Elias with her and Boaz stood in front of Rue, who stood up as well. They were behaving as if Dawn was a threat, but the poor girl felt such great betrayal that it almost physically hurt. “They fucking removed my bones and broke my spine! MY FUCKING SPINE! Do you know how much it hurts, MOM?!”

Rue was horrified by her daughter and didn’t dare to look at her and buried her face in her mate’s chest. Boaz in turn wrapped his arm around her, comforting her. This made Dawn see red. “Don’t you fucking dare and seek comfort! DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE!”

“That’s enough!” Finn ordered. Dawn’s head snapped to her side where her brothers stood. “Mom – no – we did what he had to do to survive, Dawn. You can’t blame us to think you were gone.”

Dawn was stunned. “Unbelievable,” She whispered. “I thought blood ran thicker than water but I guess I am wrong.”

“You can’t blame us,” Finn repeated again.

Dawn wanted to respond but Aiden replied instead. “But she can,” He said calmly. “You didn’t see where they kept her… The fact she is standing here somewhat fully sane is a miracle. I understand the grief you had to go through and that you had to find a way to deal with it. But you can absolutely not tell her she can’t blame you for your actions.”

“We didn’t know,” Finn tried to defend.

“Exactly, you didn’t know.”