Adventure of Exiles

He was sitting on his boat at night. Looking out into the sea and drinking.

He had a lot on his mind.

Lukas left town to go to Lipsia, the seat of Duke Albrecht.

Noah still needed some time to research and translate what he found at the ruins.

He was still thinking of what Jakob said to him.

Why did he share his past? He’s usually more guarded than that.

The only one he ever really talked to about his feelings was Edwin. Back in Svarostadt, Edwin was as close as Felix was going to get to a mentor and father. In turn, Edwin expected Felix would carry on his legacy.

What an idiot.

“I guess, I’m going soft.” Felix said out loud as he drank more beer. He emptied his mug.

He reached for the pitcher glass but instead was just handed it.

“Who are you talking too, Felix?”

Felix nearly fell over the side of the boat.

“Ah fuck!” He said as he realized Lisa was sitting right besides him.

“You should be more aware of your surroundings, Felix. Also, all this alcohol is probably not good for you.”

“Whatever. How long have you been there, Lisa?”

“Just arrived.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“I am serious though.”

“And I’m serious you won’t stop bothering me. Can a man drink himself into an alcohol induced coma in peace?”

“Not when you are mumbling out loud and almost fall into the ocean. Now what’s on your mind? I’m not going anywhere until you talk to me.”

“Ugh. How you even find me this time?”

“Oh, I just went up to your house and asked Michael.”

Betrayal! Ugh, what do you want now, Lisa? I’m just a simple farmhand who wants to drink and be left alone.”

“I been doing a lot of talking recently.”

“What’s new?”

Lisa had a cheeky smile, “I talked to grandpa and he told me about your little heart to heart. I heard about your conversation you had with Lukas when he was leaving town. I also remember the expression you had during the fight back at the ruins. Something has been bothering you.”

“So?”

“It’s not healthy to keep it all inside.”

“I don’t need someone to talk to. I have alcohol.”

“How about you tell me a story about your life.”

“There aren’t any stories. Well not any happy stories. You wouldn’t want to hear the rest of it.”

“Try me.”

“Alright. Once upon a time there was a mercenary named Felix. His father ditched the family when he was young. His mother died when he was a teenager, so he joined a mercenary company. He had a best friend in the same squad. They had fought for as comrades in arms. One day the friend dies, leaving the other all alone. The end.”

“That was the most depressing children’s book ever.”

“Why do you even care?”

“I consider you, my friend.” She then brushed her hair and looked away for a moment before continuing, “And umm...well, I’m also bored.”

“What a horrible reason to want to listen to me.”

“But a reason, nonetheless. Now tell me your troubles.”

“You sound like an old lady.”

“I am an alchemist. I’m wise beyond my years.”

Felix chuckled and kept drinking. He looked out into the sea.

He wondered how many of Elk Company was still alive. They been scattered to the winds. There was Captain Holzsch, Felix knew he was still alive. He was probably leading a new Elk Company. Same name, different people.

Albert died of camp fever. He wanted to be a teacher.

Orwin was smashed by artillery. He was taking care of his grandparents.

Adler took an arrow to the neck and bled out. He had two children.

Ebner was stabbed through by a spear. He would knit socks for his younger sister while at camp.

Ranulf... He had a charming laugh. He was a fantastic scavenger able to find food in the most desolate places.

They used to get together and play cards and drink. Ranulf was good at playing the violin, he wanted to Celestia Academy after his service.

Maybe it was the beer, but he saw it clearly.

He remembered the last day they were together. Ranulf and himself out on watch. Acting as sentries they sat up on vigil at their station through the darkness of the night.

Ranulf played his violin.

“Pfft. Even late at night you are playing on that stupid thing.” Felix commented.

“Got to practice even now.”

“It’s a small miracle that hunk of wood hasn’t been smashed by now.”

“A blessing from the gods. Just like every day, a blessing to wake up to a new day.”

“Yeah, whatever man. I’ll feel blessed when we are out of this shithole.”

“What are you going to do once our contract is over?”

“Me? I’m going back to the company hall in Breslow and get transferred to some cushy peaceful part of the country. Rake up some easy commissions. Get hot showers again. Good food and wine.”

“That does sound nice.”

“What about you Ranulf?”

“Me? Well, I like to see the Skarrage Sea.”

“What we can see the sea just fine from here.”

“It’s not the same. You know how it is in Breslow being inland. When I was a kid, I read about the Skarrage Sea from a book that was donated from the church from what the writer said the calm blue waters is truly a sight to behold. I want to soak it in that sight. Maybe even try my hand at fishing before I go the capital.”

“Sounds boring.”

“Well, Felix. Things tend to be less uh exciting outside of being a mercenary. But there is more to life than war.”

“I suppose so. Just have to survive to see it.”

They went back to their silent lookout. Ranulf practicing the violin through their shift.

The next day they got in a minor skirmish hardly notable.

Except for one detail.

Felix held on to Ranulf as he was bleeding out after nearly being cleaved in half by a claymore.

Felix lied to him. Told him he was going to be ok. Told him that there were girls with big breasts would love to meet a guy like him at Celestia Academy.

“Why is your hand shaking?” Lisa asked.

“What?” Felix replied. He looked down and his hands were indeed shaking.

“Nothing. It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing, Felix. What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing, Lisa.”

“No, it’s not. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Stop pushing. You’re annoying.”

Lisa pouted, “why are you being so difficult? Why can’t you just open to me?”

Felix finished his beer and threw the mug into sea.

“Because it doesn’t matter. It’s been my personal philosophy to not get attached to anyone.”

After he finished talking, they stayed like that for what felt like an eternity.

Then she put a hand on Felix’s cheek. Lisa didn’t look afraid. She just looked at him with gentle eyes.

“You must have been hurting for too long now.”

Felix’s cheeks felt hot.

He got back up and sat on the edge of the boat.

“Whatever.” He muttered.

Lisa sat up and she leaned on his shoulder. She then warped her armed around him.

She was warm and soft.

Felix could smell the scent of lavender.

“You say you don’t want to get close to people but you’re not alone, Felix. You have people who care about you.”

Felix didn’t say anything. He couldn’t think of any snarky comments.

“It’s not good for you to bottle everything up like this. It’s ok to let it out.”

Felix felt Lisa’s body against him, it was comforting.

Felix had an odd feeling in his chest.

“...is it truly, ok? I have to be strong for everyone I carry in my heart.”

“No. You don’t always have to be. There is a fine line between strength and stubbornness. You can show weakness. It’s ok.”

Felix took a deep breath and let himself be held.

It was nice.

After some time, Felix spoke, “This has been a lot. I’m feeling exhausted. I’m going to head to bed.”

“I will too. Come on, let’s go.”

“You know I can take care of myself.”

“Yeah, but I’m not taking any chances.”

“Ok. Alright. Lead the way, miss alchemist.”

“I’ll hold onto your hand. So, you won’t get lost.”

“My house is literally right there.”

“Just in case.”

“You are a real pain, you know that.”

“Yep. I’ve been told that many times. But I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Felix shook his head and smiled.

He then took Lisa’s hand and the two walked back up to Felix’s house.

He waved her goodbye as she disappeared into the grove separating their houses.

He opened the door and went into his room and laid down on the bed.

As he fell asleep, still with that strange feeling in his chest.

He wasn’t sure what it was. It felt like a warmth spreading through his body.

He couldn’t quite place what he was feeling.

Must be the alcohol.

“I will worry about it tomorrow.” Felix said as he pulled up his blanket.

His mind went into a haze as he drifted off to sleep.

***

He awoke with a start.

“Shit. It’s morning already.”

He got dressed and went outside and jogged across the grove.

Back on the farm.

Klaus greeted him with a warm smile, “Felix, good to see you this morning. We have a lot to do today.”

“When do we ever not have a lot to do?”

“A fair point. Let’s get to work.”

Felix and Klaus tended the crops, did some weeding and other chores.

Klaus checked on a horse, she was looking worst for wear.

“How is she doing, Klaus?” Felix asked as he was carrying some tools on his back.

“Hmm, still sick. Could I have you go into town and stop by Chris’s clinic? Grab some medicine for me, Chris will know what I need.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

After putting the tools away and with a bit of swagger, Felix went back into town.

The sun was bright, the wind was cool, and the sky was blue.

As Felix walked into the clinic, he noticed someone familiar.

Isaac was standing there in front of Chris’s desk.

Chris looked up from his paperwork, “can I help you, Felix?”

“I need some horse medicine. Klaus told me you would know.”

“Ah, Rin. A good gentle horse. One moment.”

Chris when back to check for the medicine leaving Felix to just awkwardly stare at Isaac.

Isaac didn’t seem to mind, as he looked out the window.

Felix had a look at the scythe on Isaac’s back. The blade was long and sharp. The blade had a black finish. The pole was made from iron and was reinforced with steel.

What do you even say to the guy?

Man, must be terrible to lose your memory...So what’s your story, amnesiac?

You got a wicked weapon there. You plan on using it?

Felix couldn’t decide which one would be the most insensitive and dumb.

Chris emerged back, “I’m actually missing some herbs. For the medicine, I need some Aklefron.”

“Is that hard to find?”

“Not particularly but it’s somewhat picky where it grows. There is a spot close to the cliffs by beach in north of town.”

“I can go gather some.” Felix then pointed at Isaac, “and if you don’t mind, I will be taking your assistant with me. He could use the walk.”

“I wouldn’t mind but, I have been ordered by Chris to stay here.” Isaac said.

“You have. But, I am Felix and not Chris.”

Chris sighed, “I’m not your commander or something, Isaac. You can go, just stay safe. Aklefron will have a cluster of white or pink flowers at the top of the stem.”

“I won’t be responsible if he gets killed. Come on, lad let’s go.” Felix replied.

As Felix and Isaac left, he heard Chris called out, “wait I didn’t tell you like exactly where it is. Ah, you’ll figure it out.”

The two left the clinic and started walking up the main road.

“Why you take me along?”

“Ah come on, a mystery man who washed up ashore. I’m curious about you.”

“So, you are a mercenary?” Isaac asked.

“Yes. A mercenary with the Order of the Raven. Everyone’s favorite collection of degenerates, scoundrels, and criminals.”

“You don’t look like a criminal or a degenerate.”

“What do you mean?”

“Criminals and degenerates tend to have more...filth and rot in their hearts. You have a brightness to your heart.”

“How would you even know that?”

“I just know...I can’t explain.”

“Eh, whatever. Maybe it’s because you have disconnective amaretti or whatever.”

“Dissociative amnesia.”

Felix snapped his fingers and pointed at him, “I knew you were a smart cookie.”

Isaac tilted his head and frowned, “what does that mean?”

“Ah, it’s a figure of speech. It means that I knew you were a clever person.”

“Oh. So, I been wondering something.”

“As a mercenary have you killed before?”

Felix was taken aback. He wasn’t expecting him to ask a question like that.

“Jeez, just throwing that one out there. Plenty of times. I did what I had to survive.”

“Did it feel bad killing people?”

Felix scratched his chin.

“Yeah, it did. I guess. But the job is a job. People pay you for your skill set. It’s just how the world works.”

Isaac seemed to be deeply considered his answer. Before he spoke again, “shouldn’t we ask Lisa for help in getting the location for the herbs? She’s an alchemist.”

Felix shook his head bemused. Apparently, Isaac was done with the whole mercenary thing.

“I rather not.”

“But her shop is right there. I’ll be right back.”

Before Felix could stop him, Isaac ran off to the alchemy shop.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Felix muttered.

Felix waited outside as Isaac went inside.

Felix waited for a couple of minutes.

Isaac came out and waved.

“I have retrieved the necessary information for our objective.”

“Uh, ok.”

“We can now proceed.”

“Hey, is that you Felix!” He heard from the shop.

Felix quickly looked away, “No, I don’t think it is.”

“Yeah, it is! Wait. Are you trying to avoid me?”

“I had what is called post hangover clarity and I thought about last night. I cringe at the thought so I’m going to avoid you. From now until hmm forever.”

“Oh really? You really think you can escape me that easily?”

Felix could tell she was grinning.

“Let’s move out, Isaac.” Felix said as he ran off.

“Hey! Where do you think you are going?” Lisa yelled as she ran after him.

Felix easily outpaced her.

Isaac kept up and then moved ahead of Felix.

“I’ll lead.”

“Ok, I guess. Let’s just get those herbs.”

Isaac nodded.

“Where the hells does he get that speed?” Felix muttered.

The two left the town and headed north.

After a bit they were at a cliffside by the Skarrage Sea. Sure, enough there were clusters of white or pink flowers on top of the cliff.

Isaac and Felix began climbing.

They had to grab onto rocks and crevices.

“So, what is your relationship to Lisa?” Isaac asked while he climbed.

“Man, you really don’t have a filter or tact? It’s none of your business.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“It’s alright. I guess we are friends. What do you think of her?”

“She’s nice and smells good. She’s been stopping by the clinic sometimes to deliver ingredients. She’s been very kind and friendly to me. She does talk a lot.”

“She is a wild card. You never know what will come out of that mouth.”

They arrived at the top and they both sat down.

Felix reached into his pouch and pulled out a beef jerky. He broke it in half and passed a half to Isaac.

“Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it. We should get a few bundles and get going.”

“You’re answer from earlier was inadequate. Perhaps I should ask Lisa what your relationship is.”

“You will do no such thing!”

“Then explain the relationship.”

“Well. Uh...well...she’s a friend. Yeah, she’s a friend. Why are you even asking that?”

“Friends, huh. Interesting.”

“Yes. You are going to leave at that, right? You aren’t going to ask her, right?”

Isaac just looked back at Felix. Without a word he gave him a grin.

“Ugh, never mind. Let’s just get these damn herbs and get back to the clinic.”

The two started picking the Aklefron.

“So, tell me, what does it feel like not to have memories?”

“I don’t know.”

“Fair enough, I walked into that one. How is working with Chris?”

“Good. I’m learning a lot. The work is challenging. But I like it, I like healing people and making them feel better. I want to learn as much as I can. Chris is very patient and has been kind to me.”

“He’s a nice guy, nice family too. So, what’s up with the scythe?”

“This is my weapon. It is an instrument of death and destruction.”

“What are you? Twelve? Don’t be so dramatic.”

Isaac just put a hand on the scythe, “I just felt like it’s part of me. Like I have carried it for a long time. It’s hard to explain...have I killed anyone? Even without my memories would I know? What is it like to kill another person?”

Felix frowned. So that’s why he asked if Felix had killed anyone.

“Sorry. I don’t have the answer I wouldn’t know if someone would remember killing even after having amnesia. Just give it some time. Who knows maybe the memories will return.”

He then put a hand on his shoulder, “Have you used that thing since we found you on the beach?”

“No. Not yet.”

“You haven’t been practicing?”

“I haven’t.”

“Hmm, alright. I will test your skills.”

“Test my skills?”

“I’m feeling pretty confident. You will join the sparring I been doing with Lukas and Jakob. Who knows? Perhaps getting the exercise will jog the memory.”

“Are you sure? I’m not confidant, I can control my strength. I’m afraid of hurting someone.”

“You are going to have to try really hard to hurt me. Don’t worry.”

“Ok.”

“Well, we got a lot of herbs, let’s head on back yeah?”

“Yes.”

The two headed back to the town.

At the clinic Felix grabbed the medicine and paid Chris.

“Thanks, Felix.”

“Anytime. I’ll see you later, Isaac.”

Felix stepped out and stretched. As entertaining as that diversion was, he still needed to get back to the farm. There was some fence needing repairing, medicine to deliver, and crops to check on.

First, though he had some extra Aklefron might as well give it to Lisa. She would like that for sure. Someday.

Well back to work first.