ACADEMY OF THE UNDEAD; BOOK TWO Stand Together ... Or Fall Together

Chapter CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE



The Hunt For The Wild One

Livinia was conscious of all the Hammers and the Pistols looking at her, so she said, “It appears there was a struggle in her apartment, and she was supposed to catch up with Scarlett tonight, and she’s not answering her cell.” Verbally laying out what they already knew didn’t have the effect of slowing Livinia’s growing apprenhension, and Thelma’s next statement only expanded the apprehension.

“That’s a bit unsettling, cause that bitch always answers when you ring her.”

A thought hit Scarlett, and she said, “They have CCTV cameras out the front of her building, so maybe they might tell us something.”

Richard pondered, then asked, “Is a concierge of an apartment block going to let someone they don’t know view their footage?”

“We could threaten them.” Thelma advised, “Give us a look, or else.”

“Actually,” Scarlett jumped in, “I know a police officer.”

“Maybe ring him Scarlett, and see if he can help us.” Livinia urged.

Scarlett engaged her cell, and after a few rings, a bright voice said, “Ohhh, this is a pleasant surprise!”

“Hi Jack, listen, I have a bit of a problem, and I was hoping that you might be able to help me.”

“What’s the problem?”

“A friend of mine may have been abducted from her apartment, and I need to get access to the CCTV footage from her building.”

Silence, until Jack said uncertainly, “Abducted?”

“Quite possibly, yes.”

“Well Scarl, I can head over to the station right now, so come in and I’ll get a team straight on it.”

Already anxious, Scarlett rubbed a hand over her brow, then said, “This is a bit of a tricky situation, and I would prefer that the police don’t get involved yet; but is there any way that you could get access to the footage?”

“Scarlett, if your friends been abducted, this is a police matter!”

“Jack please, I need a favour and I need you to get me access to the footage from her building.”

Jack pondered, then asked, “What’s going on?”

“I haven’t got time to explain, but can you do it, can you meet me and get me access?”

“Where is it?”

“Just outside the city.”

“Hmmm …” was the only reply Jack offered, so Scarlett pleaded, “Jack please, this is really important, and if you help me, I will make it up to you.”

After a moment of contemplation, Jack said, “Text me the address.”

*

Stanley was amused, and excited by the vampires startled reaction, and he said, “Ohhh, don’t be rude, say hello to my wife.”

Taylee glared at her, the statuesque woman standing before her naked except for the knee-high boots.

“I did ask my wife to dress for this solemn occasion, although she suggested that she didn’t want to get any blood on her clothes.” Stanley said darkly. “Although I thought the boots were a novel idea.”

“I say again asshole, neither you or this evil bitch scare me.”

With a blank expression on her face, Iveta slapped Taylee hard and said abruptly, “I am not a bitch.”

Taylee hissed and bared her fangs, and as soon as Iveta saw the fangs appear, she slapped her again.

Taylee grimaced, because the slaps hurt, the slaps more powerful than a female human could produce. She tried to control herself as she ran it through her mind. The bitch had obviously been resurrected, and now she was a zombie, or if you wanted to get technical, she was a Resurrected Being. From her experience, Resurrected’s were just mindless creatures who didn’t possess any supernatural powers, although the two slaps indicated that this one was very strong. Six jawbones hung on a wall, so Taylee assumed that the zombie freak may have drunk the blood of six vampires, which could mean that she was now much more than a mindless zombie. She was going to die, that was obvious, although she would prefer quick rather than not-quick, so she snarled and spat out, “You are a bitch, an evil fucking bitch!”

Surprisingly, the woman didn’t flinch, she just kept her steely gaze on her.

Taylee wanted to agitate her, so she said, “I can tell you’re strong Zombie Bitch, so let me up and we’ll fight!”

Iveta drew in a breath, then said calmly, “I do not want to fight you, my desire is to hurt you.”

“Yeah, I should’ve known,” Taylee mocked, “Zombie Freak is fucking scared!”

“Scared, no.” Iveta replied calmly, “Fear does not touch me.”

Taylee remembered that the woman used to have a thick European accent; I, I am the nightmare! Although now she spoke with a fluent American accent.

“Come to think it, when I ripped your neck to pieces all those years ago, you weren’t scared then,” Taylee said derisively, “So maybe you’ve always been completely fucked up.”

“I don’t think she likes me.” Iveta said drolly.

“I understand what you’re saying dear wife, although if you get arhhh … intimate with her, she may change her mind.”

Iveta glanced at Stanley, then turned her gaze back to Taylee as she said, “I’ve never had sex with a vampire, so vampire, may I have sex with you?”

“I don’t give a rat’s ass what you do zombie bitch!”

Iveta climbed on to the table, then nodding at the needle, she said, “Clinton …”

Stanley pulled the needle out, dabbed at the puncture mark, then asked, “Would you like a sip before you begin?”

Iveta placed her lips over Taylee’s forearm, licked the puncture, then squeezed her lips together as she drew in a few dribbles of blood. “Hmmm, tasty.”

Stanley dabbed at the mark again, then placed a band-aid over it.

With her arms supporting her weight, Iveta rested her groin in between Taylee’s spread-eagled legs, then began slowly grinding into her. “Ohhh yes, I think I’m going to enjoy this.”

Taylee tensed, because while this was an emotional shit-fuck of a situation, she was distraught that in a physical sense, unfortunately, because of the creature she was, her enhanced senses would flare and introduce a variety of physical sensations that she was incapable of preventing. Derail it, stop it … “Ohhh yeah bitch, that’s it, fuck me, because I love getting fucked!” Taylee yelled.

“I have no doubt that what you say is true, and while I’m disappointed that you will gain pleasure from the act, the disappointment is overshadowed by my growing excitement.” Iveta replied calmly. She ground into her slowly, her hips rubbing against the vampire’s smooth thighs, and she looked at her, excited by the confused emotions blazing in the vampire’s eyes.

*

The night manager tapped into the network, then advised, “Hmmm, went down; the whole system went down for a couple hours.”

“What time?” Jack asked.

The manager tapped in again, then replied, “Went Kaput at 8.37am, back on-line at 10.23am.”

“What happened, why did it go down?”

“No, dunno, sorry, although that’s the first time I’ve ever seen it go down.”

“So it doesn’t happen regularly?”

“This is a top-of the-range system, and the only times I’ve heard of it going down is if the whole city has a power black-out.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it.”

“How come the cops are looking into this?” the manager asked, “What’s going on?”

Jack thought about it, then said, “There was a disturbance up the street, and we’re just looking into it, so thanks again.”

Jack and Scarlett walked out of the building, and seeing the obvious distress on his lover’s face, he said, “If it’s a top-of-the-range system, it could be that this was deliberate Scarlett, so are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

Scarlett bowed her face into her right hand, then said hesitantly, “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

Annoyed by her secrecy, yet always willing to help her, Jack asked, “Do you know of anybody who would want to abduct your friend?”

Scarlett knew that minutes were ticking away, each minute being lost forever, although the yet-to-arrive minutes were all that mattered. Facing him, she said solemnly, “If I could tell you I would, but I need to know who went into the building.”

On the outskirts of the City, CCTV cameras were on most buildings, and Jack looked at the buildings to his left and right, cameras plainly visible, and across the road, at least every second building had a camera.

“Okay, let’s go door-knocking.”

*

“Having sex with a vampire Darling, where does that sit in your Memorable Experiences File?”

Iveta smiled as she said, “In her current state of bondage, the vampire seemed unable to respond to my amorous display of affection, although Clinton …”

“What, my love?”

“In trying to subdue her emotions, the vampire grimaced and clenched her teeth frequently, so dear husband, I believe that at the moment, the vampire and me are of equal standing.”

“What do you mean Darling?” Stanley asked knowingly.

“I achieved that which I sought, although I believe that the vampire achieved the same prize.”

“Goodness me,” Stanley muttered in feigned annoyance, “Try not to pleasure the vampire, because our intention is to torture her.”

“I apologise Clinton, although I will engage with her again soon, and this time I will attempt to achieve that which I seek, and also deprive the vampire of attaining the same prize.”

“Yes, please do Darling, try and make the vampire understand that we wish to punish her, not excite her.”

“Clinton, I have a question …”

“Please, go ahead.”

“It has come to my attention that her fangs have appeared again,” Iveta began, “Does that mean that vampire fangs appear after the creature’s orgasm?”

“Hmmm, I guess that means that she is either very excited, or else very pissed off.”

“Ohhh, husband, if it is the latter, I would very much like to piss her off again.”

“Maybe Darling, we can both entertain ourselves on the vampire, and we can take notes about when the fangs appear and when they don’t.”

Iveta feigned offence as she said, “Husband, am I to understand that you wish to engage with the vampire?”

“I must confess darling wife, that yes, I do wish to engage, although my engagement will be with the intention of hurting her rather than pleasuring her.”

“Husband, I am aggrieved that you wish to stray outside the boundaries of our marriage vows,” Iveta began, then she focussed on the vampire as she concluded chillingly, “Although if your intention is to hurt her, I will allow you to proceed.”

Taylee tried to retract her fangs, although maybe it was a waste of time. Being a vampire, her body mechanics dictated that when her survival was threatened, the fangs would appear; and seeing as how she was hostile, agitated and scared, the fangs weren’t going to disappear simply because she wanted them to. She was going to get fucked again, by both of them; that was quite obvious. She knew that unwelcome sexual abuse wouldn’t kill her, although as she swung her gaze to the transparent bag and watched the drips, she thought depressingly, Sexual abuse won’t kill me, but that will …

The jawbones mounted on the wall, the needle in her arm, and somebody standing before her that she had already killed. Taylee reflected that death was Good-bye, death was, Awww fuck, have I just been ENDED? Although the tall blond that Taylee had Ended, wasn’t ENDED, she was standing in front of her, smirking at her. Taylee could ride through as much sexual abuse as they could throw at her, although it was the physical abuse, potential torture and the agonising death that worried her. Dejected, defeated already, Taylee made a wish. Hey, yeah, I’m ready, so you know, END me, END me now, please …

*

From a convenience store directly opposite Taylee’s building, Jack and Scarlett viewed the footage. “9.37am, four guys wearing baseball caps or beanies going in, but they don’t come out.” Jack pondered.

“There’s a fire escape out the back of the building, so I assume they exited that way.” Scarlett stated.

“Possibly,” Jack agreed. “Do you recognise any of the men?”

“No I don’t, but can you get shots from this footage; I mean get blown-up shots of their faces?”

“If you tell me what’s going on, sure, I’ll organise that.”

“Jack please, I don’t want the police involved at this stage, but I really need to know who these people are.”

“Gorgeous, you’re stretching the limits of our relationship.”

“Jack, if you do this for me, I’ll come over and see you every night for a whole week, but I need to find my friend, so I need a starting point.”

“If this is drug-related, you could be searching for some dangerous criminals, and I should be handling this rather than you placing yourself in danger.”

“Your concern for my safety is appreciated, but I have a network of people who can assist me with this matter.”

Jack pondered, then asked, “So if I help you, you’ll spend the week at my apartment?”

“I’ll spend the week-nights at your apartment, yes.” Scarlett replied, then she added, “After I’ve found my friend of course.”

“Okay, well I’ll go to the station and get a few stills done, and then I’ll send them through to you.”

Scarlett hugged him, then said, “Thank-you, I won’t forget this.”

Jack put his hand on her shoulder and said, “Just remember, if you need me, call.”

“I will, and thanks again.”

An hour later at the Academy, Livinia had the stills blown up and printed. She handed them out to the group and said, “We don’t know who they are, although to kidnap someone, we should assume that the men are involved in criminal activities. We need to split up and call in to any places that have any links to illegal activity, which includes brothels, gambling dens, striptease places, drug labs and biker hangouts. I will stay here, and if anybody gets a lead, ring in straight away and we’ll organise our next move.”

The vampires moved away, and soon a convey of vehicles drove out of the Academy.

In less than an hour, Elizabeth and Giddy were at their destination, a biker bar miles from anywhere. Knowing that Giddy wasn’t skilled at subtle negotiations, Elizabeth said, “Okay, let’s go in, and let me do all the talking.”

“Uhh uhh,” Giddy replied, “Yo too nice, and iffen yo want to find out stuff from biker’s, yo don’t be nice.”

“Ummm Giddy, we’ll try nice first, and if that doesn’t work, we’ll go to Plan B.”

“What’s Plan B?”

“We’ll try Plan A first, so just let me do all the talking.”

“Nit-nit, yo too nice but!”

Elizabeth faced her and said wryly, “If the worse thing that anybody ever says about me is that I’m too nice, well I think I can live with that.”

Walking up to the entrance, they were greeted by two burly bouncers. “Evening ladies, what can we do for you?”

“Ummm, my friend is meeting us here.” Elizabeth replied.

“This is a private bar,” one of the men said, “What’s your friend’s name?”

Elizabeth had assumed that two attractive young women would be welcomed into a biker bar, so she was surprised by the rejection. Trying to think, she muttered, “Errr, arrhh, Choppa.”

“Yeah?” the other man asked, “You little ladies know Choppa?”

Surprised again by her lucky guess, Elizabeth nodded and said, “Yes.”

“Just wait there and I’ll go and get him.”

“Errr, actually, we wanted to surprise him.” Elizabeth replied quickly.

The man seemed uncertain, although the other man nudged him and said, “We’ll let ’em in, I mean they’re chicks.”

“Yeah, sure,” the other man agreed, then he said to the girls, “Ain’t too many people here yet, but in an hour or two, this joint will be pumping!”

Elizabeth smiled shyly, then they walked down the entrance hall and into the bar. Ain’t too many people here yet, was five; four men sitting at a table, while another man stood behind the bar.

Elizabeth walked up to the bar and said, “Hello, I was hoping you could help me.”

“Wow, fine looking young ladies, sure I can help you.” the man replied.

“Thank-you,” Elizabeth nodded, then she spread the photos across the bar and asked, “Do you know any of these men?”

The man had a cursory glance at the first large photo and then shook his head. “No.”

Elizabeth thought she saw his eyes flicker in recognition, or surprise, and she asked, “Are you sure? I mean have a look at all of the photos.”

“I looked, and I don’t know him.”

Elizabeth pointed to the other photos and asked, “What about these men, do you recognise any of them?”

The man shook his head, “Nope.”

“Listen, what this is about is that I owe all these men money, so I need to find them so that I can give them the money.”

“Just leave the money here, and I’ll make sure they get it.”

“Ohhh, so you do know them?”

“Nope.”

“But you said that you’ll make sure that the men get the money.”

“Listen little girl,” the man began, “You don’t get to come in here and ask questions okay, so either buy a drink or else piss off.”

“Little girls got a nice ass.” one of the men from the table muttered.

Elizabeth crinkled her nose, and she was just about to reply, Little girl? I am a lot older than I look! Although she remembered the last time she had used that line, and that occasion hadn’t gone over as she had wanted it to, so she said with a hint of pride, “Yes, most people who gaze at my bottom think that it is quite nice.”

“Very nice.” Giddy said agreeably.

“Anyway Mister Man-Behind-The-Bar, I will not go away until you have looked at these photos.”

“I looked.” he replied gruffly.

“You barely glanced at the first one, and there’s four photos here!”

With both arms braced on the bar, the man glared at her and asked, “Little girly, do you know what this place is?”

“Yes, I do.” she replied, “This is a biker bar.”

“Yes it is, and in a couple of hours it’s going to be full of randy bikers who are looking for a bit of young pussy, so my advice to you would be to clear off and stop asking questions.”

Having been called a little girly and a bit of young pussy, Elizabeth was miffed enough to want to raise her voice and say, I am a lot older than you think! But she fought through the miffication, because effectively, if she added her human years and her vampire years together, she was still young. While Elizabeth was trying to think of an appropriate response, one of the men at the table sniggered, “Clear off, or else take your jeans off.”

More miffed than before, she turned and faced the men at the table and said, “Excuse me?”

One man said, “You’re excused.” And another man said, “Come over here and I’ll buy you a drink.” And another man said, “Let the pretty girls stay, because I’m feeling kinda frisky.” And the final man said, “Take off your jeans and I’ll buy them off you!”

In Giddy’s world, now was the appropriate time to rip somebodies throat out, although she was trying to abide by her Mistresses philopshy; Do good things, not bad things …

Elizabeth faced the man who wanted to buy her jeans, and she said, “These jeans are not for sale, because I am wearing them.” And unfortunately, she followed that decisive statement with an admission that in the circumstances, probably didn’t need to be stated. “And even if I was willing to sell them, I wouldn’t take them off now, because I’m not wearing any underwear.”

A thought struck Giddy as she gazed curiously at her new bedmate. She remembered that she had aksed Blondie Bible in their very first meeting if she had a brain injury, and the pretty blonde had said, No. Maybe she was bull-shitting, or else she was so naïve and innocent, that she was almost like Bambi. Giddy’s mind wandered, as it was prone to do; and she remembered the time she had found out that Bambi was a male deer and not a female deer, and she remembered it because she thought that startling revelation might have been the starting point to fucking up her brain, and as it turned out, her life. Did deers become transgender-aware before humans did? In her former human life on the tough back streets of Cincinnati, three girls Giddy had known went on to become strippers, and they were cool chicks, although they were all as dumb as fuck, and they all adopted the stage name, Bambi. That was cool though, because Bambi was a girl’s name, but then Giddy found out that the Bambi in the movie was a deer with a dick, so she snorted coke, or injected heroin, or inhaled whatever-the-fuck-it-was, because on the back streets of Cincinnati, chicks was chicks, and dudes was dudes. Cathy didn’t call herself Chuck, because she was a chick, and Grant didn’t call himself Bambi, because he was a dude, and on the tough streets of Cincinnati, people with dicks had masculine names, and people without dicks (and also strippers) had feminine names.

Giddy slapped her on the arm and said, “Blondie Bible, youse don’t say yo ain’t wearing no undies when we in a bar with five dudes gawking at us.”

“I beg your pardon?”

Giddy watched Elizabeth’s cute little nose crinkle in confusion, and she said, “Bambi was a dude, not a chick, so don’t say no more about no undies.”

The man at the bar was more interested in the two young women now, and he said brightly, “I’ll get you girls a drink on the house; what do you want?”

“I told you what we want,” Elizabeth replied curtly, “I want you to look at these photos and tell me if you know these men.”

“Okay, I will later, but sit down and make yourselves comfortable and I’ll get you a drink.”

“If you buying her jeans, I’ll buy her t-shirt.” a large man at the table whispered.

“Ohhh, this t-shirt is not for sale, quite obviously because I am wearing it. I am looking to clean out my wardrobe, so I can bring a collection of my old t-shirts for you to sift through the next time I come in.” Elizabeth replied. She looked at the large man and said apologetically, “I’m not sure whether any of them would fit you though.”

“I’m more interested in buying your panties girly!” a man with a ponytail said.

The bearded man sitting next to him nudged him as he said, “She ain’t wearing no panties dickhead!”

“See,” Giddy whispered into her ear. “Yo don’t say youse ain’t wearing no undies when there’s five mean looking dudes gawking at us.”

“Yes, okay,” Elizabeth nodded, then she turned to the men and said, “I got mixed up before, and I am wearing underwear.”

“I don’t believe you, so prove it!” the man with the ponytail said.

The man behind the bar asked, “So what can I get you lovely ladies?”

“Get me a gun.” Giddy mumbled gruffly.

“So how much you want for the jeans?” one of the men asked.

“Excuse me, you collection of scruffy men, we just came in here because we’re trying to find our friend, and we believe that the people in these photos can help us locate our friend.”

“I already told you,” the man at the bar snorted, “We don’t know them.”

“You haven’t even looked at all the photos!” Elizabeth protested.

“We don’t know them, we don’t know anyone.” the man at the bar replied.

“And we didn’t see anything.” the man with the ponytail added.

“We never see anything,” a short, stocky man said, and then he added, “Like to see your ass but.”

Giddy faced Elizabeth and said, “Blondie Bible, take a back seat huh, and let me handle this.”

“What are you going to do?” Elizabeth asked.

“I’m gunna get some answers to ’um questions.” She faced the man at the bar and said bluntly, “Do yo know who these fuckers are?”

“No, I don’t know anyone.” he smirked.

One of the men at the table said, “She got a nice ass too!”

Giddy ignored the comment as she glared at the man behind the bar, and she asked aggressively, “I gunna aks yo one time more, do yo know the fuckers in these photos?”

“I don’t know anyone.” he replied smugly.

“Hey girlie, you got no knickers on too?” one of the men asked.

Simply trying to be polite and responsive to questions, Elizabeth said, “No, my friend is not wearing any knickers either.”

“Fuck-a-boot,” Giddy wheezed as she spun around to face her. “Yo don’t say nobody ain’t wearing no knickers to yo dudes gawking at us.”

“Ummm …”

“What?”

Elizabeth didn’t want to slow Giddy’s momentum, although she did need to make a point. Facing Giddy, she asked, “Didn’t Aleisha tell you to stop saying yo?”

“Yeah, but shim ain’t here.”

“I understand that, but I think you need to make a more conscious effort to stop saying it, because-”

“Nit-nit, fuck-a-choppa, forget about that shit and let me handle this!” Giddy interrupted, and then she farted. “Whoops sorry. Them’s creep out sometimes if I get excited, see.”

“If she is wearing panties, they’ll have a big, brown skid mark on them now!” the man at the bar laughed.

Silently, Giddy produced her fangs, then in a fluid motion, she leapt on to the counter. The men at the table rocked back in surprise at the sudden action, and then clumsily, they all stood.

Squatting on the bar and facing the bar-tender, Giddy hissed, and then said threateningly, “Listen fucker, yo tell us what we want to know, or me’s gunna rip your throat out!”

Two men produced knives, and all the men began moving towards the counter, but the man at the bar said hesitantly, “Steady boys, she, she’s a vampire.”

Elizabeth produced her fangs and then faced the men as she said, “Actually, we’re both vampires.”

The men stared at her in shock.

“So boys, go and sit back down and chat amongst yourselves while we go about our business.” Elizabeth said cheerily.

“What ya want us to do Johnno?” one man asked nervously.

Johnno stared at the hissing vampire on the bar, and she was quite pretty, although with the pointy fangs six inches from his face, Johnno said shakily, “E-e-everybody sit down and take it easy.”

Giddy hissed, snapped her gaze around to stare at the men, then she said threateningly, “Unless you fuckers wanta get ripped to pieces, maa advice would be to sit down and shut the fuck up!”

Elizabeth watched the men cautiously take their seats, and she asked brightly, “So how are you anyway boys; are you having a good night?”

The men glared at her, so she said, “Yes, no, what?”

“What the fuck do you want?” one of them asked.

Elizabeth grabbed the photos from the bar and strolled over to the table, then dropped the photos in front of them as she asked, “We want to know who these people are.”

The short, stocky man said gruffly, “None of us know who they are.”

“How can you tell, you didn’t even look at the photos.”

“I looked, and none of us know who they are.” a larger man replied.

Giddy looked at Johnno and said quietly, “Go and sit at the table wit them.”

“What?”

Giddy bowed her face and huffed, then she said through gritted teeth, “Iffen I gotta repeat yoself, I’ma gunna pluck both ya eyes out.”

Johnno slunk over and sat at the table.

Giddy pushed her long jacket open and produced her machete, and she twirled it around as she said, “Okay, so we’s is all gunna play a little game, so fuckers, put your hands on the table.”

“Why?” the stocky man asked.

Giddy glared at him, then with both hands raising the machete over her head, she swung it down, and with a booming crunch, it embedded itself into the edge of the table. All men jumped as a few drinks crashed over, and Giddy wriggled the machete free then held it upright as she yelled, “Yo don’t get to aks me questions, yo just do what I fucking tell ya to do! So put your mother-fucking hands on the mother-fucking table or else me’s is gunna take somebodies fucking head off!”

None of the men moved, and Elizabeth saw the fire in Giddy’s eyes, and she sensed that a head might coming flying off at any moment, so to lighten the tense mood, she asked, “What is the purpose of the men putting their hands on the table?”

Giddy hissed, then said darkly, “Each fucker is gunna pick up the photos in him’s left hand and look at them proper like, and if the fucker says I don’t know these fuckers, I’s gunna cut off his right hand!”

“Ohhh, okay, that sounds like fun!” Elizabeth replied, then she said brightly, “So come on boys, hands on the table!”

“Excuse Miss …” one man with a long ponytail said.

“What?”

The man held up his left arm and said, “I, I only got one hand.”

The girl’s looked at the arm, the arm stumped at the wrist. Elizabeth said, “I can see that there is no hand attached to your left wrist, although you can still place the wrist on the table, and if it comes to your turn and you give my friend an unsatisfactory answer, she can simply cut your whole lower arm off.”

“No wait up,” the man began, “She said pick up the photos with your left hand, but I canna do that.”

“Well, in your case, you can pick up the photos in your right hand.” Elizabth replied.

“Excuse me …” a large bearded man said.

“What?”

“Can I pick up the photos in my right hand too?”

“Ummm, you seem to have two hands my friend, so if I was you, I would do as instructed.”

“How come we can’t choose what hand we pick the photos up with?” the stocky man asked.

Elizabeth turned to Giddy and asked, “Can they choose which hand they pick the photos up with?”

“Fuck!” Giddy snorted. “I said what I said, and that’s be the way it is!”

After a moment of silence, the man with the beard asked, “What did she say?”

“She said no.” Elizabeth replied bluntly. “So pick up the photos and look at them please.”

One of the men mumbled, “Ummm …”

“What?”

“Which hand was it again?”

“Ohhh, Cheese Crackers, ummm, Giddy, which hand?”

“Fuck-shit, left hand, except for the fucker who ain’t got no left hand!”

“Ohhh, so I don’t have to pick them up?” he asked.

Giddy hunched over and said snappily, “No, you don’t have to put your freaking single paw on the table, just hold ya arm out and I choppa the whole fucking arm off!”

The man picked up the photos in his right hand.

“Listen, I gotta tell ya something …” Johnno began nervously.

“What?”

“We’re protected by the Mammon Clan. We look after them, and they look after us.”

“That bunch of fucking pussies!” Giddy snorted.

“Yeah, you don’t mess with us or else the Mammon Clan will be coming for you.” the man with the beard added.

“I’m interested huh,” Giddy began in a calmer tone, “How they gunna know who done what to who, iffen I cut youse all up and rip ya necks open?”

All the men were silent, and Elizabeth asked politely, “Ummm, Giddy …”

“What?”

“Was that a question?”

“Yessum.”

“So you’re looking for a response from the boys?”

“Nit-nit, arhhh, nahhh, maybe it was more like a threat.”

“So it was a threatening question, although it was a threatening question which you don’t require a response to?”

Giddy seemed confused, and she mumbled, “I fink so.”

“Okay boys, let’s get back into it,” Elizabeth began, “Mister One-Handed-Man, do you know the people in these photos?”

The man flicked through the photos nervously, then he said, “No, I don’t know them.”

“Hmmm,” Elizabeth mused, “Do you remember my friend’s threat?”

“Yeah, kinda.”

“Well, I can see that you only have one hand, but if you wish to keep that hand, I would advise you to reconsider your response.” Elizabeth said in a motherly fashion.

The man looked at the photos again, then he said timidly, “Arhhh, it’s hard to tell, I mean they all wearing baseball caps and you can’t see their faces proper.”

“Thanks, yo, bro,” Giddy said. “Now put ya mit on the table.”

“What?”

“Put ya hand on the table.”

“Which one?”

“Fuck me, ya only got one, so put the fucker on the table.”

“Why?”

“Why?” Giddy laughed, “Because I’m gunna chop-chop the fucker off!”

“No, that’s not fair!” the bearded man said.

“Listen bushy fucker, I said if yo fuckers deny knowing these fuckers, hands will be coming off!”

“No wait, he didn’t deny that he knew them, he said that it’s hard to tell.” the bearded man replied.

“It’s hard to tell for me too, and I got worse eyes than the others!” the stocky man added.

“I can’t tell because I’m colour-blind!” the large man said.

“I only got hand!” the ponytail man said.

“We are protected by the Mammon Clan!” Johnno said.

Elizabeth had been expecting Giddy to blow up because of the lack of co-operation, and she was surprised when Giddy said calmly, “Okay, sorry, forget about it and we’ll play a new game.”

Johnno was interested, and relieved that the vampire had backed down, and while they were vampires, they were female vampires, so he thought he should seize this opportnity and issue a subtle threat. Cautiously, he said, “No, actually, we are protected by the Mammon Clan, so if you know what’s good for you, both of you should leave.”

“We will leave after we play this game.” Giddy replied quietly. “So’s to get the game under way, pick one.”

The men looked at one another, then Johnno asked, “Pick one what?”

“I’ma gunna kill one of youse, but youse can pick who it is. Which ever fucker you pick, I’m gunna pluck him’s eyes out, choppa-chop both hands off, then me and Blondie Bible is gunna drink up all the blood, okay?” she said very calmly. “So fink about it, then tell me which fucker is gunna die right now.”

She spoke so calmly that none of the men thought she was serious, until she said, “Okay, time’s up, who’s it gunna be?”

“No wait a minute-” Johnno started, but Giddy cut him off. “Point to the fucker I can kill, or else it’s one vote against you.”

“No, no! You can’t kill any of us!” Johnno exclaimed.

“Blondie Bible, keep count, and that’s one vote against him.”

“Okay, so one vote for Johnno, your vote now Mister-One-Handed man.”

“What?” he blubbered.

“Your vote, pick who is going to die.”

The man began trembling, and Elizabeth said, “Three more seconds.”

Johnno called out, “This isn’t fair!”

Elizabeth glared at the one-handed man and said, “Your vote now or else!”

“Well, well, not me.” the man said timidly.

“Is that your vote?” Elizabeth asked.

“Yeah, yeah, not me!”

“Hmmm, who do I allocate that vote to Giddy?”

“For being a smart-ass fucker, that counts as one vote against everyone.” Giddy replied.

“Okay, so Johnno has two votes and everybody else has one vote. Your turn man with the beard.”

“No, this is not fair!” the man cried out.

“He didn’t answer properly, so is that one vote to everybody as well?” Elizabeth asked Giddy.

“Yeah, except for Bushy, he gets two votes.”

“Ohhh, yes, that might add to the suspense,” Elizabeth said. “Johnno and Bushy have three votes each and everyone else has two votes. Your turn large, intimidating man.”

“Is that me?” the large man asked quietly.

“Fuck-a-deer,” Giddy snorted, “You’re about six-foot-one-hundered, so of course it’s you!”

“Okay, well I do not wish to participate, because this is stupid!”

“One vote for everyone?” Elizabeth asked.

“No, two votes for him.” Giddy replied.

“Ohhh, that means that he’s in the lead!”

“Wait, no, you’re just making this up as you go along!” the man bellowed.

“So four votes for the large intimidating man, three votes for Johnno and Bushy, and two votes for Chubby and Lonesone Hand.”

“Chubby?” the stocky man wondered, “Who are you calling Chubby?”

“Put it this way, it’s your vote Chubby, and if you vote for Lonesome Hand or the large intimidating man, the large intimidating man will be the one to die, or if you vote for Johnno or Bushy, it will be a three-way tie and three men will die, so please, cast your vote.”

“I’m not chubby.” the man grizzled.

“Yes you are, now please cast your vote.”

“We warned you, we’re tight with the Mammon Clan.” the stocky man stated.

“We have a winner!” Giddy declared. She hustled behind the stocky man and yanked his head back.

The stocky man struggled, and he blurted out, “Wait, I didn’t win! I only had two votes!”

Giddy peered into his eyes as she snarled, “Yo won cause’n yo fucked around too long, and anyways, yo is colour-blind, butt’n ya won’t have to worry about that after I pluck ya eyes out.”

“Ummm, excuse me …” the large intimidating man said meekly.

“What?”

“Me, I’m the one who’s colour-blind, Choppa just has bad eyesight.”

“Why thanks fucker, now Choppa is gunna have no eye-sight.”

“No, hold on a minute …” the man with the beard said.

“What?”

“Well the voting didn’t seem fair, so maybe you should do it again.”

“Shut up idiot!” the large intimidating man snarled at him.

“What?”

“Well you know, we didn’t get picked, so just shut up.” he whispered.

“But Choppa is our friend.”

“Ohhh whoops!” Giddy chuckled. “I forgot to say that me is gunna keep killing you fuckers until you tell us who these fuckers are.” Giddy pushed the man’s head to the side, and with her fangs poised over his neck, she said brightly, “Before I pluck your eyes out, I just wanta have a little drink.”

“Wait, wait,” Johnno said in desperation. “What happens if we tell you who they are?”

“None of your fucking business, ass-fucker!”

“Well look, I’ll tell you, but only if you promise not to tell these peope who put them in.”

“We promise.” Elizabeth said.

“Okay, they’re from a local crime gang.”

“Address, where do we find them?”

Five minutes later Giddy and Elizabeth hurried back to the car, and Elizabeth rang. “Livinia, they could members of a local crime gang, so I’ll you text you the address of their clubhouse, and we’re heading there right now.”

“Okay, I’ll round up who I can, but don’t go in until we get there.”


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