A Walk Amongst Shadows (Book 2)

XIV

I must have made Simon and Evangeline proud after my first day of solo rounds, because I had worked the floor on my own every day since. Deja seemed both impressed and annoyed.

“I’ve only ever managed to be put on rounds twice since coming here!” she exclaimed after I had completed my fifth day in a row of working alone, “and even then, I did more observation than actual administration of care.” She sighed as she twisted one of her curls around her finger.

“Maybe Evangeline will let me take you with me one day,” I encouraged.

She shot me a look.

“Or not..” I corrected as a smile danced across my lips.

Deja laughed. “Sorry, it’s not your fault, I just get frustrated.”

“I’m sorry,” I sat down beside her.

I couldn’t help but remember Marcy. Deja bore the same expression Marcy used to wear whenever I would catch on to something faster than she could. I felt the familiar feeling of guilt, mixed with a little pity. If either one of them had been mages they’d be just as good at healing as I am. I bet the two of them would get along quite well. A part of me longed to tell Deja the truth, just like I had so desperately wanted to tell Marcy. Telling Deja won’t make things right with Marcy. I chastised myself. I can’t let my past blind me to potential dangers in the city.

“You with me Rose?” Deja asked.

I blinked back to the present. “Yeah, sorry,” I replied, stumbling over my words.

“Relax, I’m not angry with you, I promise,” she jabbed playfully at me.

“Good,” I smiled, not that I had been worried about that, “you’re the only friend I have in this city.”

Deja laughed, clearly complimented by my words. “Well, shouldn’t you be off then?” she asked, gesturing towards the door.

“I suppose so,” I shrugged and pushed the door open, nearly running into Simon as I did so.

“Oh, Rose, just the girl I was looking for. We actually don’t require your assistance today.” His tone was light and matter of fact, but I was confused.

“Wait, what?” I stopped in my tracks.

“Yeah, it’s a light day today, you’re free to go.” He put a hand on my shoulder as he dismissed me. I spun around and went back to the medicine room where Deja had already begun setting up for the day.

“Back so soon?” she asked.

“Simon told me he didn’t need me today…”

I watched as Deja furrowed her brow. “Hmm…” she started, “that’s odd, I feel like all I ever hear him and Evangeline talk about lately is how good patients have been doing since you started working the floor.”

“So they’ve been happy with me then?” I asked.

“Oh, most definitely.” She smiled. “Maybe we just don’t have a lot of patients today, I wouldn’t think on it too much.”

I never understood why people advised not to dwell on things when my intuition demanded more scrutiny.

“Well, do you need any help?” I offered.

“Hardly,” she scoffed, “there’s only two listed for today, I won’t be here long.”

I nodded, maybe she was right and today was just a slow day. “Alright, well I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.” I shrugged, and with that, I was off.

I was walking home from the royal city when a woman walked up alongside me. One look at her black eyes and I instantly recognized her as a shadow walker. Great. I thought to myself. She was a little taller than me and curvier as well, with short black hair and full lips. There was an edge to her that felt dangerous. I was instantly uneasy in her presence.

“Pardon the intrusion, dear,” she spoke in a velvety voice. “You’re Rose, right?”

I looked around and unfortunately discovered that she and I were totally alone. “I am,” I dared to respond.

“The name’s Eloise. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” She stuck out her hand and I instinctively took it. Her eyes bored into me like I was a fresh meal. “You’re Aris’ new find, aren’t you?”

I raised my eyebrows. “Yes?” I wasn’t exactly sure what she meant by that.

She smiled coyly. “Aris and I go way back. Has he not mentioned me to you before?”

I shook my head politely and replied. “No, I don’t believe he has.” I hastened my pace ever so slightly. I didn’t know where this conversation was going but I didn’t like it. She skipped along twirling a piece of her hair between her fingers.

“Forgive my manners, I just couldn’t wait any longer.”

“Wait for what?” I inquired.

“Why, to meet you, of course!” she sounded delighted. “Our sweet Aris vanishes for nearly a century then suddenly reappears with some pretty little mystery woman that’s gotten all wrapped up in some prophecy….” she trailed off, “I just had to see you for myself.”

I didn’t say anything to her. I wasn’t sure how to respond to what she had said. We took a few more steps together before she continued speaking in her sweet sing song voice.

“You’re a lucky one, you know that?”

“Oh?” I answered.

“Mhm, I don’t know how you managed to land a man like Aris. Gods know I’ve been at him for decades and never gotten anywhere.”

I stayed silent, again unsure of what she expected me to say back to her. I felt a stir of jealousy in my stomach.

“I don’t know what it is about you mortal girls. Of course, I suppose you’re more a mage than mortal.”

“Mortal girls?” I asked.

Her mouth twisted into a smile that sent a chill down my spine. “The last girl he was hung up on was mortal. I don’t think he’s ever gone for one of his own kind, at least not for anything more than carnal.” She stared unblinking at me, observing my every move. It was obvious she was trying to get a rise out of me.

“Hmm,” was all I could think to say.

“I can sense him all over you, you know?” She narrowed her eyes at me, “You must be sooome bitch to get him so mixed up like this.”

I stopped short. “Excuse me?”

Her grin widened and became more sinister. She was playing with me. “Rumor has it, he’ll appear if any of us attempt to lay a hand on you.”

Again, I stayed quiet.

“Let’s find out, shall we?” Her voice dripped in a false sweetness. She raised her hand to me like a cat about to strike. I heard her muttering something under her breath. I barely had time to respond because before she could land the hit, I heard a voice from behind us.

“Hello, Eloise.” It was Aris. Eloise’s theory had been correct.

She froze where she stood, her face lit up at the sight of him. “Ari, my dear!” she squealed. She ran up to him and slid her finger across the back of his shoulders. I watched Aris nudge her hand away.

“What are you doing here?” he asked curtly.

“Just acquainting myself with your new pet,” she said gesturing in my direction. I glanced at Aris, who rolled his eyes. I held back a smile.

“Does the doll even realize you’ve got her marked?” She spoke to Aris but maintained eye contact with me. No doubt, hoping to make me angry.

I kept my composure.

“Of course she knows,” he answered very matter of factly. “How else am I supposed to keep the likes of you and Stellan away from her?”

I suppressed a laugh as I saw her taken aback expression.

“Aw, no need to be mean. What have Stellan and I ever done to you?” she pouted. She snaked her hand across her chest as if to pull him into a hug. Once again, he took a step back and brushed away her advances.

“You’ve done plenty,” was all he said.

She was about to open her mouth once more but Aris cut her off.

“I appreciate your interest in seeing after Rose, but I can see her the rest of the way home from here.” He put his arm on my shoulder and moved to continue walking home. I saw her eyes flash and darken at his sudden dismissal of her.

“Until next time then.” She winked at us and then vanished.

I found myself laughing as soon as the coast was clear. Aris seemed relieved to be rid of her.

“So….Ari,” I started putting emphasis on his name.

He laughed. “Yeah, please don’t ever call me that again.”

I chuckled. “Deal.” We continued walking along the path towards. “Why are there so many shadow walkers interested in meeting me right now?” I asked.

“Like I told you before, your power is a pretty big deal. Stellan and Eloise are two of the older shadow walkers in existence. It’s not often that something this big happens.”

“She seems to really like you.” That was an understatement, of course.

“Yeah…” he exhaled, exasperated. “She’s been on me since I first turned.”

“Really? That long?”

He nodded. “She thought me easy prey, I suppose. I guess I offended her at my disinterest. She’s been acting like that around me ever since.” He shook his head.

“She said you have a thing for mortal girls,” I teased.

“Hmm,” he raised his eyebrows. “She may have me there.”

“Is that so?”

He chuckled again. “Relax, it’s not like that. She’s referring to a girl I knew back in Wren’s Glen.”

“Who was she?” I asked. Aris had never told me about any of his past relationships.

“The first girl I ever loved.” He looked sheepish. “Her name was Leera.”

I smiled seeing how the mention of her name warmed his face. I also felt the tiniest twinge of jealousy, which I quickly shoved away.

“Tell me about her,” I invited.

“We met shortly after my family moved to the village. We were in the same clan so we saw each other pretty much every day.” He shook his head, “We wanted to get married so badly…” he trailed off.

“Why didn’t you?” I asked.

He sighed. “Her family was never very fond of me. At no point was I ever truly a part of that place. Even when I tried my hardest, I never seemed to get it quite right.”

I nodded in complete understanding.

“She ended up marrying someone else,” he added.

“I’m sorry, Aris,” I said, trying to sound comforting.

He shrugged. “She turned on me just as quickly as the rest of them did.” His face fell. “Anyway, I’ve not been one for relationships since.”

I smiled.

Seeming to remember I was beside him, he quickly added, “present company excluded, of course.” He winked at me.

“How come you never mentioned her to me before?” I asked.

He shrugged. “I don’t know. Why don’t you ever talk about Thomas?”

“Well, you’ve already met the guy. What else do you want to know?” I teased.

“Do you wish I would have told you?” he asked.

I shrugged. “I like hearing about your life.”

He looked amused by the sentiment.

“Was there any truth to what she was saying about me being marked by you?” I had to ask.

“It’s a little tricky to explain. Shadow walkers are known for being territorial, not that I see you as property or anything asinine like that, but the longer we stay around someone the more obvious it becomes to other shadow walkers… Does that make sense?”

I thought for a moment. “So when she said she could sense you all over me…” I trailed off.

He rolled his eyes. “She was probably trying to frighten you, but what she meant was that she could tell you and I have been spending a lot of time together. Trust me, love, I’ve put no physical mark on you or laid any sort of infernal claim on your soul.”

I laughed. “I didn’t think that was the case. Do all shadow walkers typically think less of mortals? Of course, I know you don’t, but Stellan and Eloise… it’s as if they regard me as an animal.”

He sighed. “I’m not proud to say it, but Stellan and Eloise’s view and treatment of mortals is far more typical for shadow walkers. Personally, I think it’s due to the fact that they each have existed for thousands of years. They’ve witnessed generations and generations of mortals cycle through. I think after a while they get desensitized. I doubt either of them even remember the fact that they were both mortal once as well.” I thought about his words for a moment. “I didn’t realize they were that old,” I thought aloud. I could only imagine the things that each of them had seen in their lifetimes. “Do you feel the same?”

He thought for a moment.

“I mean, I know you haven’t been around nearly as long as they have, but do you think you’re becoming desensitized like they are?”

“Honestly, I think it’s impossible not to. At least not a little bit.” I could tell he was being careful not to offend me.

“Is that what scared you back then?” I was about to clarify, but it was clear he knew exactly what I was referring to. I felt anxious, we hadn’t discussed this topic since he first told me the truth about his past.

All he did was nod at first. “I think that and the fact that unlike Eloise and Stellan, I had become jaded so quickly. It scared me. I didn’t know what it meant for me if I continued such a drastic spiral for the rest of my existence.” He looked conflicted.

“How do you feel about mortal life now then?”

“I’d be lying if I told you that I held mortal lives as equivalent to a shadow walker’s. I mean, their lives are so fragile and fleeting…” he trailed off. It was odd hearing him speak of mortal life my life in this way. Does being a mage mean I am different from other mortals? He continued, “but that doesn’t mean they deserve death. I mean think about how you are with animals. Would you choose to save a mortal’s life over that of a rabbit?”

I nodded my head. “Of course I would.”

“Right. But that doesn’t mean that you go out and kill every animal that crosses your path.”

“True, although…” I faltered and he glanced at me, “people do like to hunt animals for sport.” I was slowly piecing it all together. “No one bats an eye when that happens…. We really are like animals to you then, aren’t we?” I asked.

He looked flustered. “Of course not, I-”

I cut him off, “relax, I know you don’t think of me that way. But as a whole.”

He was still hesitant to agree, but I knew I was right.

“I guess Eloise wasn’t kidding when she called me your pet.” I nudged him playfully, trying to lighten the mood.

He scoffed, “if you say so.”

I found our conversation oddly comforting. As the rest of the day progressed, I felt as though a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Somehow likening mortals to animals made it easier for me to reason the seemingly barbaric acts of shadow walkers. While there certainly exist mortals that are staunchly against the harming of any animals regardless of the reason, most mortals saw no problem with hunting and consuming animals. I thought about the fur pelts I had seen used for clothing and decoration. The grotesque image of humans being skinned and worn, their skulls mounted on walls. I shuddered at the idea. I supposed to an animal, mortals were just as sinister, if not more so, than shadow walkers. Maybe morality really is subjective. I thought to myself. Or maybe you’re just desperate to make excuses for Aris.

That night as I laid with Aris, I couldn’t shake the nagging voice of Eloise and wondered just how many women he had been with before me. I forced these thoughts out of my mind. Stop being so childish. I told myself. This is exactly the kind of thing she is trying to do. After all, what did it matter who he had been with before? He must’ve sensed my brief distraction as he shifted from kissing my lips to my neck. I tilted my head back and relaxed. Being with Aris like this made it impossible to be distracted by anything else.