A Thousand Heartbeats

“Oh, please don’t bow,” I insisted, rushing into the room. The man in front of me looked worse than our army did marching back from the Island. His clothes were ripped, and I could see red marks on his wrists where he’d been bound. His lip was split but healing, and there were bruises on the patches of skin I could see.

It wasn’t until he lifted his head that I recognized him. When I’d fallen into that glass table, my father had been too stunned to offer assistance, even as the blood poured through my torn dress. A guard had swooped into action, carrying me back to my rooms. It was humiliating . . . but I was thankful someone had helped me.

He helped me.

“Your Highness. Forgive my state. I wanted to see you first.”

“Have you not been tended to, sir?” I had to imagine he was in need of food and rest. He shook his head. “You must be starving,” I said, turning to Nickolas in desperation.

His eyes flicked back and forth between the guard and me, clearly reluctant to miss anything. “Of course,” he finally said. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

He moved quickly from the room, and the guard and I were left alone.

“Before anything, I must apologize to you,” he started urgently. “We tried to stop them from bringing their entire army, but it was fruitless. They gave no hints they were planning to sabotage you until that morning. I failed to protect you. It’s unforgivable.” His eyes went to the floor, ashamed.

“Say no more. I didn’t know His Majesty intended to use our army to corner them. The whole engagement was a disaster. Just tell me what you can.”

He nodded, moving his gaze up to me. “We were instructed to tell them to meet His Majesty on the Island. It was meant to be neutral ground for peace talks. The king would offer them goods and a treaty in hopes of future cooperation. That was all I was told.” He shook his head.

“We allowed ourselves to be captured. They questioned us, mostly about protections on the castle. They wanted to know about fortifications, though there was one soldier with a lot of questions about our history. Coleman told their leader just enough details to get them on the boats. When the leader—Kawan—realized he was being manipulated, he ordered us killed. That same soldier from before, Lennox, walked us down to the shore. He asked a few more questions, about the country, about you.”

He swallowed hard, thinking back. Meanwhile, my ears perked up at his name.

“Our hands were bound . . . he could have just run us through. But he told us to walk into the water instead, giving us a chance to swim home. He even cut my ropes just enough that I could break out and help the others.”

He turned away, lips trembling as he gathered the strength to finish his story. “We did get our arms free, but the currents were very strong, so we couldn’t get back to shore. By the time we managed to beat the pull out to sea, we were so tired. . . . We just wanted to get out of the water, so I started making my way to the first land I could see. It was too rocky. We kept getting slammed into them, and . . . I think that was when we lost Coleman. I can’t be sure.”

I put my hand to my mouth, so moved by his brokenness that I felt I might cry myself any moment.

“I was finally able to climb out, and hoisted Victos behind me. We both passed out from exhaustion on the edge of a forest somewhere. When I came to, he was sweating and thrashing in his sleep. I ventured out, trying to find food and water, but it was impossible. I gave him what little I could gather, but it wasn’t enough, and I tried to keep him out of the sun, but I had no way to keep the fever at bay. He died while I was asleep.”

He had to pause again. This torture I understood. Even with all our doctors and medicines at my disposal, I couldn’t heal my brother or father, and the powerlessness was devastating.

“A few people were kind enough to let me ride on the back of their carts, but being injured slowed me more than I liked. I’ve been told that the campaign went ahead, and that there was a storm?”

I sighed. “There was a brief battle at sea. They attempted to burn our boats, but with our muskets, they had to keep a distance. We both continued to the Island, and once we came across one another, someone from their side shot an arrow directly into Escalus’s chest. It was pure chaos after that. But a hurricane came in, and we were all forced into hiding. My brother and father are fortunate to even be alive.”

It was then that Nickolas returned, a tray of food and drink in hand. He rushed in, setting them on the table beside the guard.

“I’m sorry. I’ve only just realized I don’t actually know your name,” I said.

He wiped at his eyes. “Palmer, Your Highness.”

“Please eat something.” I gestured to the food, and he half-heartedly picked up a piece of bread.

“So, are you currently regent, Highness?”

“Yes,” I confirmed. “Appointed by my brother before we left the Island. Since then, both he and my father have been unconscious, but I am confident they will both recover.”

I watched as Nickolas’s eyes danced between us, questioning if I should be saying as much as I was.

“How bad are your injuries?” I asked. “I’d like to place you in one of the guest rooms for the time being and send a doctor. And then ask an enormous favor of you.”

At this he looked up. “My injuries are minimal. How can I serve Your Highness?”

“I need someone to deliver something to Lennox. A gesture between leaders.”

“Then you mean, it’s for that other fellow,” Nickolas clarified. “Kawan, isn’t it?”

I shook my head. “No. I was in their midst. Kawan may be in charge, but he is not their leader.”

Palmer nodded weakly. “What I’m delivering . . . would you say it was akin to extending a hand of peace?”

I considered this. “Something like that.”

“Annika, are you sure this is wise?” Nickolas interjected. “Your father and brother are on their deathbeds. These people killed your mother and I have no doubt they’re biding their time to get to you. How can we keep you safe if you send signs of goodwill after such aggression?”

It was a fair question. No matter what, this was likely going to end in war.

But I was the daughter of a peacemaker.

I’d fought so hard for the right to hold my sword, fought to learn how to use it. And now I knew that laying it down was a fight all its own.

“We will act with caution, but I’d like to make efforts toward ending this with no further bloodshed. Certainly you can get behind that.”

His eyes flashed between Palmer and me. “Annika, I don’t know if I can agree,” he said lowly.

I walked over, attempting to keep this part of the conversation private. “If you are to become consort, then you must know this with all your heart: the people are first. We are second. So I need to put their needs before mine, even at the risk of my life. And I need you to support me while I do it.”

He swallowed hard, looking at the ground. “Do what you will.”

“Thank you.”

I stepped away, returning to Palmer.

“Take as much time as you need, and if you’re not comfortable riding back into their territory, say so. I can’t promise your safe return, and after what you’ve been through, I wouldn’t begrudge you in the slightest.”

“If I can eat and rest tonight, I will happily leave in the morning,” he replied immediately.

“So soon?” I asked. “Are you quite sure?”

He nodded. “I’d like the opportunity to look him in the eye again.”

And I wished for nothing more myself.