A Thousand Heartbeats

I strode into the royal library, feeling new. Rhett wasn’t at the front desk, so I wove through the shelves, listening for a sign of him. It took a moment, but toward the far back of the room, I heard the shhh of books being slid into place. I peeked around a corner, and there he was.

Rhett stood, squinting at the names on the spines of the books, double-checking that everything was placed correctly. His passion for his work was so admirable. It struck me then that he’d never done anything without an urgency or a drive, without that passion.

He looked up, catching me watching him. In an uncharacteristic move, he shoved the books on an empty portion of a shelf, running to me, his eyes painted with worry. He threw his arms around me and spoke in a rush.

“Oh, Annika.” In saying my name alone, I could hear the ache, the longing. He pulled back, looking me in the eyes, his hand cupping my cheek. “I can’t believe you escaped. How are you feeling?”

That was the question, wasn’t it? I still couldn’t quite explain it all. I felt both thrilled and exhausted, proud and defeated, thankful and disappointed.

“It’s hard to say,” I admitted. “I’m assuming you heard about my mother.”

He nodded. “And you looked the murderer in the eye?”

“I did.”

“I think I would have tried to murder him myself if it had been me,” he grumbled.

I laughed humorlessly. “Well, I suggested his giving me a sword again and letting me have a chance, but he refused. I wasn’t in a position to negotiate for better.”

“And still you escaped,” Rhett said, his voice moving from anger to awe.

“Yes. And now that I’m feeling better, I have some research to do.”

He perked up at that. “You came to the right place. What can I do for you?”

“I want the trial notes for when Jago was in court,” I told him. “I want to read through the evidence and sentencing. After meeting his son, I feel like I need to know more about what happened.”

Rhett nodded, considering this. “Very well, then. This way. Court documents are in the history section.” We started walking, and I noticed him fidgeting with his fingers. “Did you happen to get my letters?”

“I did.” I ducked my head, thinking of his notes. Vague as they were, I could read the longing in them.

“I didn’t dare put anything in writing,” he whispered, even though we were alone, “but after hearing Nickolas made it back without you, I wanted another opportunity to offer my hand.”

“Rhett . . . I . . .”

He smiled back at me. “I know you’re going to reject me. But save it for a few minutes so I can pretend we stood a chance for just a moment longer.”

His eyes were so sad, the color of hopes being dashed. I took his hand. “Then let me say this instead: Thank you. You saved my life, Rhett.”

His forehead knit into ridges as he stared at me, confused.

“When they took me from the woods, they bound my hands with rope, but when I was left in the dungeon, they put me in proper shackles. I couldn’t have gotten out of those if you hadn’t taught me. You got me out of that dungeon as if you’d been right there beside me.”

His eyes were so soft, so hopeful. “Really?”

“Absolutely.”

After a moment of hesitation, he closed the distance between us, moving as if to kiss me.

“Rhett,” I whispered, and he stopped, swallowing, his face mere inches from mine as he spoke.

“Sorry. I was . . . moved by your words.”

“Rhett, you’re my closest friend. And I treasure you, but I’m marrying someone else. So, if you cannot keep from kissing me, I’ll be forced to maintain my distance in the future.”

He looked at me, his eyes disappointed. “After everything that happened? Didn’t he abandon you?”

I nodded. “I don’t love him. I don’t even respect him. If I were free, I would never ever allow myself to be linked to a man like that. Marrying Nickolas, for me, will simply be signing a contract.” I shrugged. “But there’s nothing I can do about it. An army might be coming any minute now. And even if they don’t come for years, when they arrive, I want them to come upon a united front. This is the best thing I can do for my people.”

He stared at me in hushed awe. “I wish I was half as good as you. I can’t think of much I’d be willing to sacrifice my whole life for.”

I smiled. “Then do me the kindness of keeping this library well. I might not be able to keep up sword fighting, so it may be my only refuge in the future.”

Rhett huffed, looking up to reach the book I needed. “If protecting this library is the only way I can love you, then I’ll guard it with my life.”