A Slacker's Road Map of the Universe, Vol: 1 of the 3K Chronicles

Chapter CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR



The ship dropped out of warp just beyond the second moon of Vega Mamorae. D00D brought up an enhanced view of the swarm of ships now orbiting the planet. Most appeared to be media ships. The intergalactic communication problem had led to all news outlets having to send someone in to cover the events on the scene, now that buying footage from other networks cost double to acquire. There were literally thousands of them circling the planet like vultures around a dying man.

Van asked D00D to zoom in on the vessel that was idling over the Northern pole of the planet. He recognised the floating fortress as New Edo, the central hub of the WWS. It was the size of a small country. It looked like an ancient Japanese palace, only millions of times the size. Blue skirting reached out from the sides, giving the impression of different floors although, had this been an actual palace, these floors would miles in height. Even Van’s former master didn’t have a ship this magnificent, and he was an Emperor.

The white walls of the gargantuan vessel had smaller ships flying in and out of them, as they were heading to and returning from the planet’s surface. The whole thing was spinning on its axis in unison with the planet below. It was almost as it the planet were a spinning top and New Edo was the handle.

“Looks like we’re in the right place,” said Van, as his nerves began to set in, “Now the guy at the top goes by the name ‘Tokugawa’. I was really baked when I watched the documentary, so that’s all I can remember, but we need to talk to him if we want to pull this off.”

“Your lack of foreknowledge doesn’t exactly inspire confidence in your plan,” commented Yukimi, “And how do you know they don’t have something to gain by POP succeeding?”

“Just have a little faith,” replied Van waving her off, “These guys live for honour and don’t even get paid for the shit they do. They should go for this.”

“I can’t wait to meet the space Samurais,” said Dallas.

“See,” said Van, “the distraction killer here’s on board. Just chill out.”

“Are you telling me to ‘chill out’ or yourself?”

Van didn’t want to answer this, instead he set in a course for New Edo and told D00D to take them in. Then he excused himself, saying he needed to “pinch off a loaf” as he was “almost crowning” and left the cockpit.

He zipped off to his quarters and stood before the sink in his bathroom. He ran the cold tap and splashed some water into his face, then he looked up at his reflection in the mirror. “What am I doing?” he asked the image before him.

“You’re doing the right thing,” came a voice. Van fell over in shock. “Sorry,” said D00D’s voice, “I didn’t mean to startle you. You know who fixed all of my systems when he fixed me up.”

Van righted himself and chuckled weakly. “I guess it won’t matter soon anyway,” he said, “I can’t see me living through this, even if I do succeed. If I fail I die and if I somehow get the signal out, there’s no way that shit-heal ‘Zeffross’ will let me live to brag about it.”

“If I may,” began D00D, “I think you’re being a real bitch about it. If you think you’re going to die, you’re statistically more likely to do so.”

“Either way, when we begin the assault, you aren’t coming with me,” said Van with a tone of finality in his voice.

“If you order me to stay, I can’t promise that I will listen,” replied D00D.

“I don’t need to order you to do it,” Van said, addressing one of D00D’s video sensors. “All I have to say is that I will never forgive myself, if I lose you again. When I thought I’d lost you before, I felt like I’d lost myself. I only chose to survive because I thought I had to. If you were destroyed as a result of a choice I knowingly made, I would have no reason to continue. You aren’t just this ship’s AI, you’re my best friend and the closest thing to family that I’ve got left.”

D00D’s voice sounded remorseful, “Van I-“

“Just stay back will you? That’s all I ask. Call it a last request.”

“As you wish… Brother.”

The room was silent again and Van was alone. He splashed his face with water once more and returned to the cockpit. He took his seat and relaxed. A few moments passed before Yukimi came into the room and asked him to follow her. He obliged and together they made their way to the cargo bay. Dallas appeared to be working hard to fix the cargo they’d acquired from the trash moon. Next to him was a half-eaten sandwich, as thick as a human fist.

“Yo!” Van shouted to him, “Where’d you get the sandwich?”

Dallas put down the tools he had been working with and turned around, “from the fridge,” he stated, “why?”

“What do you mean ‘from the fridge’,” Van asked, “that things been empty since the POP station?”

“Oh, right. Well, whoever fixed the ship also refilled the food stores. You haven’t been living off nutrient packs this whole time, have you?”

Van looked dumbstruck. “If someone had told me there was ‘real’ food I wouldn’t have!”

“Oh,” said Dallas, “well, there’s food in the fridge if you want any. “

Van sighed, “What do you want me for anyway?”

“Oh, right,” said Dallas, “well, I got two of these things running again, but I’ll need to sacrifice your game system to make’em usable. They don’t have a human compatible operating system, so I need to cannibalise the one in the game.”

Van ‘huffed’, “If you have to, go for it. What else do you need?”

“Nothing,”

“So you called me down here, just to ask something that you could have asked through a comm. channel?” asked Van, eying up Dallas’ sandwich. He was already thinking about what he would eat after this conversation was over.

“Well, I thought you’d want to see how cool these things look. I mean, come on, aren’t these awesome!?”

Van looked down at the mechanical marvels that Dallas had spent the last two days repairing. He had to admit it; they did look awesome. He was looking forward to using them to wipe the smug smile from Zeffross’ face.

D00D’s voice came over the PA. “I thought it best to inform you that we have an incoming hail from New Edo. Could you all please come to the cockpit.”

They made their way back to the cockpit and sat down. “Ok, D00D,” said Van, “patch ’em through.”

D00D did as he was asked and the HUD displayed the caller. It was a humanoid alien, with red skin and small horns protruding from his skull. He appeared to be wearing a white and blue kimono. He bowed to the trio and they returned the gesture.

“Welcome to New Edo,” said the man, “If you are here for information, then you should refer yourselves to the press statement that has already been submitted.”

“We’re actually here to help,” said Yukimi, “we have information on the people responsible for this atrocity.”

“Do you have any evidence to support this claim?” asked the man.

“I do,” Yukimi replied. She held up the data pod on which she had been storing all of her research.

“Please send the information over and we will add it to our own,” the man said. He had clearly dealt with a few people claiming to know what had really happened already.

“There’s more to it than that,” Van said, “we’ve been chased half way across the Universe because of this data. We wish to speak with Tokugawa.”

The man thought for a second, this wasn’t the response he was expecting. “No one speaks to the Shogun, unless he requests it. However, if what you claim is the truth, then the Daimyo will wish to speak with you. Hold your position until you are given clearance to dock.” The screen went blank and the trio were alone.

“So far, so good,” said Dallas.

An hour passed before the docking clearance came through. Van took the controls and guided the ship into the docking lane that entered half way up the floating fortress. All around them were convoy ships, brandishing the same colours as New Edo, flowing into the monumental vessel. The difference in size, made them look like bees flying into an apiary. As impatient as Van was getting, with the slow progress of the traffic ahead of him, he dared not break formation to expedite their arrival. He remembered enough about the documentary he’d watched to know that the WWS didn’t take rule breaking kindly.

Eventually the docking bay entrance came into view. Village-sized blast doors had been slid back to reveal the entrance. They drifted in, flying over a sea of vessels. Van followed the instructions he had been given and landed the Bessie on a raised platform, high above the other ships. As they touched down, they could see that half a dozen guards in power armour were waiting for them. Another man was standing in front of them; he appeared to be wearing the same blue and white kimono as the man they’d spoken to earlier. Unlike the man before, however, this man looked almost human. He was paler than any human that Van or Dallas had ever met and his long, black, shiny hair was tied in a top knot, with the bulk of it trailing down his back.

The crew exited the ship via the cargo bay and went to meet the welcoming committee. The man in the kimono bowed to them as they approached. “Welcome,” he said, “before we go any further, I must ask that you surrender any weapons you might have about your persons.”

“It’s cool,” said Van. “We aren’t packing heat.”

“All the same,” said the man, “we must scan you to be sure. There are many who would kill to hinder our cause and we cannot risk losing a Daimyo.”

“Whatever you need guys,” Van replied.

The trio raised their arms as three of the guards scanned their bodies glowing green batons. They then stepped back and returned to their formation.

“Very well,” said the man, “if you would please follow me.”

The man and his guards led them along a wide corridor. On the way they passed by many people, scurrying from room to room. They all wore kimonos, each sporting different symbols on their shoulders, which denoted the department they reported to. The group reached a door and filed into a large, round elevator. The man in the kimono pressed a button and the doors closed. As the elevator ascended, the man began to speak to them without turning his gaze from the doorway.

“You will be meeting with the Daimyo of the Canes I galaxies. It is a great honour for an outsider to meet with him.”

“You’re not the Daimyo then?” asked Van.

The man laughed.

“The Daimyo are of a higher class than I,” he said, “I am a member of the Samurai class only. I serve my Daimyo in matters of state.”

“Ok,” said Van, “is there anything we should do when we meet him?”

“You should only speak when spoken to,” the man informed them, “he is a man of great honour, you should show your respect by bowing deeper than he does and never turn your back to him.”

“Different,” Van replied, “But I get it.”

The elevator came to a halt and the doors slid open. They disembarked and entered a large hall filled with people of numerous species. Apart from the guards in power armour, they all wore blue and white kimonos with a gold sash around their arms that had the name ‘Nobunaga’ written on them in kanji. The high walls of the room were covered in massive view screens that showed maps of the planet below. In the centre of the room, was a gigantic, round table, which had a hologram projected from it. The hologram was of the planet Vega Mamorae and the current traffic that surrounded it. The projection was being shown in real time. A colour-based death count lit large regions of the planet’s terrain red where the death toll had reached genocidal levels.

The trio were led to the far side of the table, where a flock of kimono-clad men were huddled in a circle. As they approached, the group dispersed. Stood at the table, was a man in a completely white kimono, with built up shoulders and two swords tied to his waist. He turned to greet them. He looked a lot like a cat fish; no hair or nose and his lips were the same shade of bluish-grey as the rest of his skin, he also looked moist. Around his mouth, hung two long feelers, giving him the appearance of having a moustache. The man who had escorted them bowed low before the Daimyo, as did the guards and the trio followed suit. Their escort began to speak when he was cut short by Dallas letting out the single loudest and longest fart of his life. It seemed to go on forever, shifting in tone and ferocity, before eventually tapering off with a squeak. The whole room fell silent. He stood up straight and pointed at one of the guards; “It was him!” he cried, fighting the urge to laugh. The guard’s face was covered by a mask, but Van was pretty sure that the face below it was not a happy one.

Their escort ignored the faux pas and pushed on; “Nobunaga San, these are the travellers who say they know the culprit behind this genocide.”

The Daimyo waved away the man and his guards and addressed his visitors directly. The look on his face showed his displeasure with the impression they had made thus far.

“Who is it that you claim is responsible for the tragedy on this planet?” he asked.

“The Organisation of Elite Organisations,” announced Yukimi.

“A very weighty assertion,” replied Nobunaga, “I trust you have evidence to support this accusation?”

Yukimi retrieved the data pod from her pocket and presented it to the Daimyo. He took it and handed it to one of his men, who back-stepped away from him and inserted the device into the table. Van whispered in Yukimi’s ear, “you weren’t hiding that inside you this whole time, were you? I mean, if you were, I’m not judging, but I’ve touched that thing and I-“

“I hid it aboard the ship before we met with your friend on the Crucible,” she whispered back sharply.

A projection of Yukimi’s research came to life before them as the Daimyo and his followers began to pour through it from all sides of the table. Multiple windows flashed on and off at lightning fast speeds, showing pictures and data files from the POP mainframe. When the followers had finished sifting through the data, they all turned to face the Daimyo. He, in turn, faced the trio.

“It would seem that your accusations are true,” he said, “I apologise for my scepticism.” He bowed to them and everyone else in the room followed suit, “Now, you implied to the Chugen you spoke to, that there may be more to your story than what is contained within these files. Would you care to share this information now?”

The trio told Nobunaga everything. How the OEO had used them to find out what the POP company were up to and how the events on Vega Mamorae were only the beginning. They told them how the OEO had used their control over the communication companies to block all conventional mass communications. Finally they told him about Zeffross, his communication device and their plan to use it against him and the OEO.

When they had finished, Nobunaga stared at them, “I understand your motivations,” he said, “but this ‘instant communication device’ you speak of, how do you know it will reach everyone?”

“I helped develop it,” replied Yukimi, “it works by manipulating quantum fields, using a material called ‘Kanosei’. What it does is-“

“Wait,” interrupted Van, “did you say ‘Kanosei’?”

Yukimi looked surprised, “You’ve heard of it?”

“I was on Thosisa to pick up a brick of the stuff until someone opened its container and it disappeared.”

“If a piece that size has in fact been created, then all one would have to do is to recreate the circumstances under which it was stored and it will rematerialize. I don’t suppose you have the recall equation?”

“No,” Van lied. “We never actually had a chance to meet the supplier before we were arrested.”

“Pity,” said Yukimi, “we could avoid a major conflict, if you had.” She went back to explaining how the device worked. Dallas was looking at Van, he knew he was lying, but why?


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