SWNOVELS Chapter CHAPTER THIRTEEN
As you may recall from the prologue to this most eloquently narrated of books (Those you whom didn’t merely skip ahead), there are many different types of planetary occupation in the year 3,000. ‘The Crucible’ is an exemplary illustration of one type in particular, the syndicate planet. While a bounty as high as the one on our heroes head’s would be enough to sell out even one’s own Grandmother to most, the criminal syndicates have a code of ethics that prevents such things. That is, when the circumstances are right of course. If for instance a life debt were owed by a member of the ‘family’ to a man with a bounty on his head; the member would be forced to protect him if called upon to do so. Luckily for our heroes, Van is owed such a debt by Vincenzo Patsi of the Panucci Family. Though not at the highest rung on the Family’s ladder, Vincenzo was nevertheless a ‘made man’, within the Family. This meant that he had, in theory, enough sway to keep our heroes safe, at least long enough for them to figure out what they would do next. It was a long shot, but they were out of better options.
It took the Bessie Fontaine nearly a month to reach The Crucible. The crew had spent the majority of this time in the Immersion gaming system, performing combat training. Yukimi had even joined in. As it turned out, she was an absolute killing machine. Her precise movements and lethal force meant that she hardly ever needed a weapon, choosing to use her bare hands to beat the life from her simulated foes. Van and Dallas were thoroughly impressed when she first unleashed this hidden ability, but now that their kill scores were dropping as a result, they had begun to pout. They logged out of a game called ‘Mech-suit Throwdown’ and took off their VR interface gear.
“You didn’t even use the suit!” said Dallas angrily.
“It was slowing me down. I was able to wipe out more of the oncoming forces without its cumbersome weight inhibiting my movements,” Yukimi replied.
“It’s called “Mech-suit Throwdown’, not ’Kill-steal bitch-face fighting- game” His comeback was not quite the zinger he had hoped.
“We have 20 minutes before we drop out of warp,” echoed D00D’s voice over the ship’s PA.
“Thanks D00D,” said Van, packing away the VR gear.
“Are you sure I can’t talk you out of this, you could very easily be walking in to the Lion’s den?”
“We’ve been over this D00D,” he replied, “If you have a better plan, I’ll do that. But, seeing as you don’t just keep Bessie safe while we go talk to Vincenzo.”
D00D didn’t reply. As the three heroes entered the cockpit, a countdown came up on the HUD screen, but it wasn’t counting down to arrival. It was a proximity alert. The clock hit 00:00:00, before they could do anything and the whole ship shook as it was impacted. The Bessie dropped out of warp and the HUD went blank. The crew were thrown to the floor.
“D00D! What the fuck just happened?!” Van screamed from his crumpled heap on the deck. The PA buzzed and jittered, then D00D’s garbled voice came through;
“We s-s-s-s-seem to have bee-een hit by some kind of eeeeeeeee-lectronic disrupter.” His voice was warped by distortion and making an annoying electronic noise whenever it glitched.
“How are your systems?” asked Van, pulling himself to his feet.
“Weeeeeeeeee have limited flight systems and life support is unaffected, buuuuuuuuuuut my vocal relays are marble ice-cream fish,”
Van sighed. An incoming hail alert was now on the HUD. He looked at the others for suggestions. Yukimi nodded for him to answer. He hesitated and pressed the answer button. The screen changed and a window opened, showing two men in track-suits; one human, one Vysotrope. They appeared to be eating some kind of red pasta dish. They wiped there faces clean as the video feed came to life; “State your business, y’ mook,” said the human, in a Brooklyn accent
“Yeah, whadda y’want?” echoed his bison-esque partner.
“Uh,” said Van, “I’m looking for Vincenzo Patsi. He’s an old friend of mine. My name’s Van.”
“Never heard of him,” said the human, crossing his arms.
“He told me this is where I’d find the Crucible.”
“Never heard of it,” replied the man again.
“Yeah,” chimed in his hairy friend, “this is just a bakery planet.”
“Dammit Big Loui,” exclaimed the man, making a large gesture with his hands. “Look,” he said turning back to Van, “We don’t know yous guys, so take your battered ship an’ your whore an’ your trained idiot an’ get outta here!”
“Wait!” said Van, “He owes me a life-debt and I need his help. Please, just ask him!”
The two gangsters looked at each other and whispered a few things between themselves. The human seemed like he was the one in charge, especially since Big Loui kept scratching his head in confusion. After a minute or so of this back and forth, they turned back to the screen and re-crossed their arms.
“Ok,” said Big Loui, “me an’ Paulie here, gonna give Vinny a call while yous guys wait. We got your ship in our scanners, any funny business and we blow you all to pieces, capeesh?”
They all nodded and the screen went blank once more. The three nervous heroes exchanged silent looks. If this didn’t work, there was no way they could make a run for it before the gangsters turned them to space debris. Vincenzo must meet hundreds of people every year and he hadn’t seen Van in over 3, and that was when Van had saved his life. It had been a chance meeting that was now their last hope of survival. Van thought about this and held his breath, the odds against them were staggering. The screen suddenly flickered back on, notifying them to an incoming hail. Van crammed his lungs with another deep breath and pressed the answer button.
Paulie and Big Loui looked very different this time, more sweaty and a lot less composed. Their previously threatening demeanour had been fractured and in its place was the submissive stance of a scalded child. Their hands were clasped at their waists and their heads were down. Paulie spoke first.
“First of all, Mr Van,” he sounded like he was reciting a rehearsed apology, “We would like to offer up our humble apologies for the not trusting of you and the damaging of your fine vessel.” Big Loui nodded in agreement, his lip quivering. “Secondly we would like to apologise to your whore- I mean- your fine lady friend. We should not of said what it was we said. Also to the fella at the back there. I did not mean to imply you was a idiot.”
“It’s ok,” said Van finally exhaling, “he is”
The two gangsters let out obviously, forced laughs. “That was very good, sir,” continued Paulie, “Finally, if it is agreeable with yous, we would very much like to tow your fine vessel to one of our docking satellites. We can repair the awful thing what we did to it while you visit Mr Patsi, at his private residence.”
“That’s fine,” said Van smiling, “we appreciate the help.”
“Thank you for accepting our apologies,” whimpered Big Loui, “We gotta go scrub a toilet now, Vinny told us that’s our job now.”
The video feed ended and the room was back to emergency lighting again. So far, so good Van thought, but we’re not outta the woods yet.
The thugs towed the ship to an empty area of space. Ahead of them, in the distance, Van thought he could see a door in space. Literally. There appeared to just be a door, floating there in front of them. But that didn’t make sense, and not just the fact that there was a door. They hadn’t, and still couldn’t, see the ship that was, supposedly, towing them.
As they drew closer, there was no doubt in Van’s mind that it was in fact a large, metal door simply floating in the cosmos (WTF, am I right?). The door slid open, slowly, from its centre. As it was about to swallow the ship, a long, sleek, black freight vessel began to materialise in front of them, as if it had been hidden under a veil that had suddenly snagged on a table leg and was being pulled away as the ship grew closer to the opening.
“They must have cloaking technology,” Yukimi said, “But then I would assume that intergalactic treaties would mean very little to the syndicates.”
She wasn’t wrong.
The opening gave way to an enormous hangar, in which some very expensive ships were docked. The now entirely visible freight vessel towed them to the back of the hangar, which appeared to be being used for engineering and restoration work.
“You said we had limited flight capabilities, D00D,” said Van, “What, exactly, have you got?”
“Mmmmmmmy systems show green on pre-pre-pre-programmed protocols, so I can execute them without too much horseradish,” came the garbled reply.
Fuck, I hope we don’t need to leave in a hurry, thought Van, until they’re repaired, D00D and the Bessie are as much use as a shit-flavoured ice-cream cone. This thought then made him think of the ‘super-smoothie’ from before. which in turn, made him think of the alien scientist who evidently knew more about him than he would like anyone to. He figured the subject was probably moot at this point, what with Mondo trying to kill him and the Kanosei gone, something about the whole thing bothered him though. He had lurched from being one madman’s pawn to the next for the last few weeks, there had to be a connection. Before he could ruminate on the matter any further, the ship came to a clunky stop in the repair area. It was time to see how much a life debt was truly worth.
The three weary fugitives made their way out of the ship and onto the Hangar bay, where Vincenzo was waiting. He had a big smile on his face and his arms were outstretched. Vincenzo was not what you would call a small man. He was a mountain of a man, or a mountain of something. He wasn’t human, but nor was he any species that Van had met another member of. He was humanoid but definitely not human. He stood around 7 feet tall and probably the same around his belt line. His hair only grew at the back and was long and black. He’d tied it into a long, pointed ponytail, most-likely to go better with his triple-breasted, pinstriped, silver-grey suit. He grabbed Van as he got close and raised him off of the ground in a hug that Van was pretty sure would kill him if it went on for too long. He set Van back down on his feet.
“This guy, uh?” he said to the others, still grinning from ear to ear. His eyes clapped on Yukimi, “don’t tell me you came all this way to show me your new fling?”
Yukimi winced in revulsion and that mere mention of her and Van being ‘together’. This made Vincenzo break out in a fit of laughter, his body vibrating with merriment.
“We actually need your help, Vinny. I need your help,” Van said.
“Wah?” said Vinny, “You think I don’t watch the news? I was expecting you sooner than this. Hey, look, this ain’t the way I like to handle things. What’s say we have a sit down at my place and we straighten this whole thing out. That sound good?” Van looked into the massive gangsters eyes, could he even refuse?
“Sure thing, Vinny. It’ll be great to catch up.”
The gangster chuckled once more and put a dinner-plate sized hand on Van’s shoulder. He led him towards a glass door to the back of the repair bay, Dallas and Yukimi following close behind. They stepped through the door and it sealed behind them. They were in a tiny room. Van was about to ask what was going on when-
WOOOSHH!!!!
The floor shot out beneath them. They were falling through open space at incredible speed. The three visitors yelped, but then noticed that the floor was still there, it was just invisible. Vinny chuckled to himself again, he was finding the whole meeting quite enjoyable. They were heading downwards into a void of darkness when, suddenly there was a huge mass flying at their feet from below. The entire planet was cloaked too! It wasn’t until you entered into the area directly around it that you could see it. The room was now visible too. It was like the box the Kanosei had been in, in Doctor Suche’s Lab. Nothing but a frame with glass sides, the floor as well.
The planet below looked like a giant city, only off in the distance did it yield to green scenery. This was terraforming done right. Van admired the view; the city looked like it had been lifted straight from the pages of a twentieth century history book. They were descending into the so-called ‘golden age’ of America. Only a few things gave away its inauthenticity, namely the flying vehicles and duel moons that littered the skies. Dallas had his face pressed, firmly, against the walls, transfixed by the sight of yet another new world. Van and Yukimi both envied him in a way. The novelty of new worlds had long since worn off for them, all they could hope for now was to recapture a glimpse of that through their companion’s eyes.
The floating room dipped below the city’s skyline and landed softly on the observation deck of one of the many skyscrapers that seemed to burst from the urban jungle below. A ‘ping’, like the sound an elevator makes when it arrives at your floor, sounded inside the room as it came to a halt.
The glass wall, or whatever it was, on one side of the room disappeared and Vinny stepped out. Yukimi and Van walked after him, peeling an oblivious Dallas from his vantage point as they did so. The building they had landed on looked like it had been built during the ‘Art Deco’ age of Earth architecture. It was beautiful; its top was comprised of curves as if made from ripples of metal-fabric, with triangular windows built into the arches it formed. They must have been 70 or 80 floors up and still there must have been another 20 or so more above where they had landed. They walked to a large, gold double-door in the side of the building. Two large aliens were stood, flanking the doorway, dressed in black suits and sunglasses. As they approached, the two solemn gangsters each extended a hand and pushed the door open.
They entered and several skimpily dressed hostesses came up and handed each of them a drink. Vinny nodded at them and they retreated out of sight, bowing as they did. Vinny stooped and turned around to face his guests;
“Welcome,” he said, smiling again, “to El Dorado Tower, The Crucible’s most lucrative casino and, for my sins, my home away from home. How about the nickel tour?”
Another door opened and revealed a room that looked like it should be in a palace. Every surface was made of marble and inlaid with gold. In the centre of the room was an actual waterfall, that started somewhere too high to see, and fed into a reflecting pool at its bottom. A mist rose from the base of the waterfall and Van was sure he saw a rainbow in it.
Light from the immense, stained glass windows gave the room an almost ethereal glow. On the sides of the room, two wide staircases grew from the floor and spiralled up the walls, criss-crossing like a giant helix leading to the sky. The bannisters were solid gold. In the background soft music could be heard, Van recognised this as being by the composer; ‘Johan Sebastien Bach’, but he couldn’t remember the name of that specific piece. The whole room was breath taking. All three visitors were slack-jawed, staring in awe at their far from humble surroundings. Vinny saw their stunned expressions; “this is just the reception room,” he said, “C’mon let me show you your rooms.”
They mounted one of the staircases, which turned out to be a luxurious escalator, up to the 18th floor then entered a long hallway. The hallway had several doors coming off of it.
The first room was for Yukimi; Vinny looked her up and down again before they opened the door. There was a computer interface next to the doorframe, he keyed something into it and the door opened. The inside looked like a picture of a palatial bedroom from Renaissance France, even the view through the windows had been rendered to reinforce this illusion; showing beautifully rendered meadows. The bed was enormous and adorned with frill-lined bed clothes. Across from it was a vanity mirror, that would have made Marie Antoinette blush, and a white velvet fainting couch. Yukimi examined the room.
“Like what you see, doll-face?” Vinny asked.
“A little frivolous, but it should more than suffice. Thank you,” she said.
Vinny looked deflated, he had apparently expected a much more enthusiastic response from her. They continued on, down the hallway, to the next door. Vinny paused in front of the door and turned to Dallas;
“What’re you called, big guy?”
“Alright, mate. I’m Dallas,” he extended a hand, but Vinny grabbed him by the shoulders and kissed him on each cheek, moving him from side to side like a rag doll. He put him back down.
“And what’re you into, pizanne?”
“I don’t know,” replied Dallas, “like, ‘cool stuff’.”
Vinny tilted his head back and laughed, patting Dallas on the back so hard he nearly fell forward. “I freakin’ love this kid!” he said through waves of laughter. “I think I know just the thing, kid.”
He accessed the interface and began thumbing through menu screens. Every so often he would look over at Dallas and either smile or shrug. He clearly took hospitality almost as seriously as a Fuumolaan. Eventually, he entered a room design and the door slid open. Dallas stepped inside and his heart stopped.
At first glance, the room looked like a Moroccan hash lounge, but when you looked closer, there were a few things that didn’t fit at all. For instance, the centre of the room had a large, raised platform with a tent draped over it, made from a translucent fabric. Inside it could be seen a huge bed, with several concubines sat waiting on top of it. The walls were all draped with large, heavy blankets except for one that was a window; through which could be seen a gorgeous nebula. It was so realistic it would give you vertigo if you stared at it for too long. Dallas turned around and stared at Vinny, speechless. His expression was one of pure euphoria and utter disbelief. He was welling up.
“Yeah the whole thing works on voice command,” said Vinny with an air of mock humility, “even the sex bots. So tell me kid, whadda’ you think? This cool enough for ya’?”
Dallas wiped the tears from his eyes and slowly walked up to Vinny and threw his arms around him as far as he could.
“Vinny, I want you to marry me,” he said. Vinny put a hand on his head and they both laughed.
Van’s room was at the end of the hallway, Vinny placed his hand on his shoulder as they neared the door.
“I gotta level with you, I’ve had this room ready for a couple weeks now, ever since I saw you with that ‘chump-change’ bounty on ya’ head. I think you’re gonna get a kick outta this.” He smiled and opened the door. Van looked at it and a smile began to creep across his face;
“Is that-“
Vinny looked down at him and chuckled. Van burst into a fit of laughter. He threw his hands up over his mouth and stared around the massive room in awe. He barely blinked, taking in every last detail.
The room was divided into two floors, the top one being a balcony that encircled the room. It was joined to the ground floor by a series of ornate pillars that supported it and a wide, sweeping staircase. The room was filled with dozens of lounge areas, mini-bars and sweet smelling incense. The most remarkable feature, however, were the scores of consorts that filled every corner of the room. They ran the gamut of every species that a human was physically compatible with, representing all races and genders that Van could possibly want to ‘get his fuck-on’ with. He turned to Vinny, his hands still to his mouth.
“I thought it was appropriate, given the circumstances of our meeting. None of these whores are gonna explode though.” He and Van shared a laugh while Yukimi and Dallas just stared at each other; sharing a look of disgust, mixed with mild confusion.
“You’re the best, Vinny,” said Van, finally, “you didn’t have to do all this.”
“Hey,” said Vinny, putting out his hand to silence Van, “I owe you my life, the least I can do is make you comfortable. Speaking of which, dinner’s in 3 hours. You can ’try out’ your rooms till then. We’ll be eating in my private lounge area on the 83rd floor. It’s formal dress, you’ll find that your wardrobes have everything you need. I gotta go deal with some stuff, that don’t concern you, so I’ll see you there. I’ll send someone up to escort you, when it’s time.” With that he left the three heroes.
“Ok,” said Van to his comrades, “get out of my room, things are about to get awesome.”