A PALE HORSE

After a not so restful couple of hours, Peter decided that he needed to get moving before the other two woke up. He padded into the bathroom and splashed some water on his face. He then crept quietly down the hall with his bags in tow. Out of the kitchen strolled Abe, holding a cup of coffee. He raised an eyebrow, and Peter could swear he heard him questioning why he was trying to sneak out of his own house. Peter pulled him back into the kitchen and spoke in a hushed voice, “I was trying to get ready without waking you up… or Joshua.” He rolled his eyes and added, “Clearly, that didn’t work out. How’s the coffee?” Peter jutted his chin in the direction of Abe’s cup as he struggled with fastening a carabiner ring to his overloaded backpack.

“On either count,” came a voice from behind him. Peter gave a yelp and spun around.

“This is why I live alone, you know!” Peter told him grumpily.

Joshua chuckled, helped himself to a cup of coffee and asked, “Why didn’t you want us awake?”

“Well,” Peter started, “Sam doesn’t know you know about him and I stashed him at Momma Rose’s place last night. I told him I would meet him this morning to get back to the airport for the flight to Moscow.”

Abe said quietly, “How were you planning on getting back to the airport, you don’t have a car?”

“Oh, I was going to call a cab or one of those new ride share companies. Now that you’re up, though, would you mind taking us back? Sam knows about you.”

“What about Joshua?” Abe turned to the man in question.

“Don’t worry about me- I’m covered. I’ll call one of my agents to come pick me up. One of the perks of being the old timer,” he told them.

Peter smiled at Abe. “All settled. We need to get moving, though. Come on, Abe. Joshua, stay as long as you need to. I downloaded those files to a flash drive for you and put it on the desk in the office. Please lock the door when you leave. I’m leaving Momma Rose my keys. I’ll stay in touch and let you know where I’m staying when I land in case you have any more questions. Thanks for everything, by the way!” Peter said in one big, long rush while pushing Abe out the front door. The last thing he saw as the front door closed was Joshua calmly sipping his coffee and shaking his head. Peter and Abe made their way downstairs in the chilled early morning to find Sam. As they went in through the little side door that Peter thought of fondly as his entrance, they heard voices coming from the kitchen. The aroma of fresh bread and sausage wafted enticingly through the air.

Peter and Abe looked at each other and rushed to the kitchen in time to hear Momma Rose say, “You eat as much as my Peter! Mon dieu, I thought he could polish off a plate fast, but I believe you may have him beat!”

“Give me another chance, Momma! I’ll make you proud.” Peter joked from just inside the doorway. Momma Rose spun around clutching her heart.

“Mon chou, don’t sneak up on me like that, unless you are trying to kill me! Then who would make your meals?” she teased. Peter grabbed her up in a hug and swung her around.

“I would never hurt my girl!” Momma Rose giggled and swatted him with her trusty cleaning towel. Peter put her down and grabbed a beignet from the nearest plate, which earned him an additional swat.

“Leave those!. These,” she said, holding up a large bag, “are for you.” Peter took the outstretched bag from Momma Rose and pulled her in for another hug.

“I’m gonna miss you while I’m gone,” he told her. She smiled and patted his cheek.

“You be careful, and call me as soon as you land.” He handed her the keys to the house and told her that Joshua was still upstairs and could she please check that he locked the door when he left. “Of course.”

She had lost a little bit of her spark when he mentioned Joshua so he asked her, “Are you okay?”

Once again, she smiled but it didn’t reach her eyes, “I’m fine.” For a second, she seemed far away to Peter, but again, just as quickly, she was back. “Peter, really! I’m wonderful, and you are not going to be so wonderful as you will be late, mon chou! Get! GET!”

“Okay kid, time to go. Rose it was a pleasure and thank you for letting me stay last night.” Sam told her. “Abe we’re catching a lift back with you, I assume?”

“Yep. Rose can I have just one more for the road?” Abe asked her beseechingly. Rose reached behind her and brought a second large bag forward and told him, “There are plenty in here for you and the girls at the airport. Now you boys make sure that they make it to them, you hear?” she told them.

“Rose, you really are an angel you know that?” Abe said with a big smile. This time the smile that Rose gave the trio was genuine, and Peter could tell that she liked the compliment very much by the tinge of pink he saw on her cheeks. Momma Rose waved to them through the glass window as the trio marched out of the little café.

“I must say, you are a lucky man, Peter.” Sam told him.

“You sure are!” seconded Abe. “I think my waistline would take a severe beating if I lived near that woman, though.” He chuckled.

“Momma Rose has been very generous around you two. Maybe I should have you by more often. Most nights she fends me off the beignets and hands me a plate with vegetables and some sort of pasta or meat with it,” Peter told them.

Sam was having a hard time deciding if Peter was being serious or not and said, “Oh, you poor thing, to have someone who looks out for you and cooks for you… the horror… the absolute horror. She should be horsewhipped.” Peter’s caught Sam’s feigned look of horror and busted out laughing.

“I guess you’re right. She is the best, but then so is her food.” Peter looked at the bag he held longingly but was determined to make the provisions last as long as possible. The trio made their way to Abe’s truck and climbed inside. Sam made a couple of phone calls to the airport to check that his plane was loaded and ready for takeoff. He had registered the additional cargo and one passenger for his flight to Russia and wanted to be sure that they were listed and all the paperwork was in order. Abe had turned on the radio and was humming along with “What a Wonderful World”. Peter had always loved the song and, today, he wanted to believe that it was a wonderful world. Some of the seedier things that he had recently experienced aside, the world as a whole was a great place. He would love to be one of the people responsible for making it better, but he knew that the responsibility for that rested on everyone. If everyone in the world took time to stop and be nice to one or two people in a day and they did the same, the ripple would widen to reach everyone in the world. He knew that there were people who didn’t or couldn’t return a kindness shown them with kindness. They were the people that needed the most help.

Sam looked over at Peter and said, “Can’t reach them all, kid.”

Peter stared for a moment and asked, “How did you know I was thinking about helping people?”

“You had that look like you were trying to solve the world’s problems,” Sam told him. “Look, we can’t always be there to protect like we were last night. We can only watch and help as much as possible. We did what we did last night because those kids needed help. There wasn’t anyone around that could do what we did. We keep doing it until we die or get caught… that’s it. There are units and agencies that work in the big cities to take these monsters down, but out here?.... we’re it.”

“I’ve been thinking about that, myself,” Abe piped up, “and I’m going with you. You’re not going to be any good trying to do this haul by yourself, Sam, and someone needs to watch out for Peter while you watch everything else,” he said, indicating, again, Sam.

“I’m not going to argue with you, buddy boy. I’ll take the help of a damn good pilot any day and any time it’s offered,” Sam agreed, and immediately called the airport to amend his earlier manifest request.

“Abe, are you sure? What about Naomi and the girls?” Peter asked.

“They’ll be fine with Joshua and his agents, Peter. As you have no doubt already seen, Naomi is quite capable of taking care of herself. We,” he said, in a slightly quieter voice so Sam could not hear, “have a mission of our own, don’t we?”Abe gave Peter a pointed look with his eyebrows raised, and Peter got the point. The girl’s horror that they had discovered and helped to mitigate last night did not cancel out HIS mission, and Peter felt glad for the help.

“Yeah, I hear you,” Peter agreed. “You know, I would like to find out more about the people in New Orleans that help kids the way Sam was describing. I think I could do some good there.” “Son, you’re going to do a lot of good for a lot of people before this is all said and done. I’m certain of that. We’re here, I’ll just be a minute,” Abe said, bringing the old truck to a halt in front of his hangar. After dropping off the food to the girls and saying a quick goodbye to Naomi, they pulled up in front of Sam’s hangar. Peter got out of Abe’s rusty old truck and stretched his back. He knew there would be a long flight ahead and, even though he wasn’t the one flying, Peter had never been able to sleep in a moving vehicle of any type. Plane, train, car or bus, it didn’t matter. He just couldn’t let himself relax enough to fall asleep. They strode purposefully across the tarmac. The cool air brushed past them, and a breeze whisked Sam’s dark hair around his head, in too big of a hurry to be polite as it rushed to join a zephyr somewhere far away. The two men stopped in front of a cargo plane. Although Peter had caught a glimpse of it the previous night, he didn’t remember it being so imposing. He climbed the stairs to board and noticed that, although the plane itself was massive, most of the available space was taken up by cargo and the seating choices were… limited.

I guess on a cargo plane, you are part of the cargo, Peter thought wryly. Abe passed him by, concentrating on some interior checkpoints, giving the plane a good once-over and ignoring him completely. Sam brushed by him and went to the wall of the plane. He unlatched and unfolded an additional seat.

“Seat’s yours. Sorry it isn’t larger, but if you want to lay down and sleep...”, he said, gesturing to the stowed cot, pointing at the far wall. “It folds out the same way the seat did. Make sure that you lock them well when you aren’t using them. Last thing I want is a body out the back on this trip.” Peter watched as Sam turned and went back into the cockpit and sat down.

“He’s not serious, is he, Abe?” Abe laughed and chucked Peter on the shoulder, then turned and joined Sam who was busily making preparations to leave. Peter glanced back at the wall and made sure that the latches on the bed were secure. He sat down in his little jump seat and strapped in. Peter was not fond of flying, which is to say he hated it. It didn’t scare him, but he found it boring and exceedingly uncomfortable, due to both limited space and pressure. Peter knew enough about cargo aircraft like Sam’s to know that they come with environmental control systems for any passengers that may find themselves in the cabin of a cargo plane, and he knew that the ECS of Sam’s plane should keep him comfortable and warm for most of the trip, thankfully. Peter really liked to be on the ground as much as possible. He had people who usually did these big shows for him and he never really had to travel out of Louisiana, so when he had told Travis, his operations VP that he was going to work the big show in Russia, he about laughed himself silly.

“You know where Russia is, right?” was Travis’s response. He knew this flight would be around twenty-two hours and it would be over the ocean, and freezing cold at altitude, if the ECS didn’t do its part. Apart from that he didn’t want to know. He heard Abe and Sam making the final adjustments and talking to the control tower. They had already walked around the plane and checked the storage areas to make sure that everything was in place and secure. Peter noticed that they made a good team and worked in tandem to get things done fast. He supposed that this was because they were both experienced pilots. He felt anxious but knew that these two wouldn’t let anything happen to him. It helped settle some of his worries. Before long the plane wound up, making an ungodly racket, and lurched forward. The violent start-and-stop reminded him of taking his driver’s test the first time and not being able to quite master the brake pedal in his dad’s Jaguar. His BPM’s went up a tick or two when the plane started to pick up speed for the ascent into the azure expanse of morning. He grabbed the handle next to the jump seat like it was a long-lost friend until he noticed the words EMERGENCY EXIT written on the handle. Peter jerked away quickly, as if the handle had burned him, and decided instead to clasp his hands together in his lap. Peter cursed and swallowed hard, trying to get his ears to pop to relieve the pressure he was feeling build up behind his eyeballs. After a half a minute of increased pressure, he reached for the pack of gum in his parka. Peter unwrapped two sticks of Juicy Fruit and popped them, folded, into his mouth and chewed vigorously. Ah, that did it, he thought. When they reached cruising altitude, Abe came back to check on him.

“You okay, Peter?” he asked. Peter nodded his head and Abe sighed and rubbed at the sides of his head, massaging his temples a bit. Peter could see that the last two days had taken a bit out of Abe as well, and he was wearing his fatigue on his weathered face. Abe smiled a half-smile and said, matter of factly, “We’re five thousand, seven hundred and sixty miles from Moscow, so to say we have time on our hands would be the understatement of the damn century. Why don’t you break out that bag?” He motioned to the large sack of provisions next to Peter. He grabbed it and unrolled the top, letting the smells escape into the plane, immediately making them feel better. “ I think she also sent some coffee.” Peter brightened at the suggestion, grabbing the thermos. Peter wasn’t going to let a little thing like flying come between him and Momma’s cooking!

Peter filled both of their cups and asked, “Sam need some?”

“He got his already.” He pointed to Sam who raised his tumbler without turning around. Peter grinned as he took a sandwich from the bag. He held the bag up to Abe who took one for him and for Sam. Abe turned and walked back to Sam who held out a hand for his and then sat down next to him.

“Feel free to unlatch the cot and get comfortable, it’s going to be a long flight,” Abe said to Peter as he munched. Feeling much better about this flight and the next few days, he sighed and decided to make the most out of this trip. Peter stood up and stowed the jump seat. He carefully unfolded the cot and settled the coffee thermos and the bag on the cot before settling himself in. He decided to catch up on his reading and leaned back against the wall. Peter could feel the fatigue of the last day finally catching up to him. He figured that he had been awake for around thirty hours. Although he went to bed the night before, sleep had eluded him in those final hours leading up to this flight. He wasn’t really sure what to expect.

For that matter, he thought, I’m not really sure of much anymore. His brain was refusing to respond, his thoughts refusing to allow themselves to be corralled. The girls. The grunch. Michael, Sam, Russia, Dr. Jo. It was overwhelming, and too hard for Peter to compartmentalize and make sense of at the moment, so it just served to make him anxious.

He started when he heard a voice, if not audibly (although he couldn’t swear it wasn’t) then at least in his head, say, Peace.

Peter thought to himself, If I could manage peace with all that’s happened, I would have been able to sleep last night. No peace for me, it seems. Not now at least, and maybe not anytime soon. Peter closed his eyes and worked through the relaxation exercises that Dr. Jo had given him so long ago. He focused on his breathing first- slow and even, in and out... When he reached the point that his breathing was level and even, he focused on relaxing the muscles in his body- feel the tension leaving the muscles... and slowly, finally, he focused on turning off his brain- relax… relax… blank slate, blank canvas. It seemed to Peter that this was the hardest part, ever since his parent’s accident he has had problems sleeping and, as part of his therapy, it was suggested that he do these relaxation exercises. He focused his thoughts internally and, just when he thought sleep would never come, he heard a voice in his ear that sounded strangely like Michael.

Sleep.