SWNOVELS Chapter 33- Arabella
Mom left me alone in the cabin with Ajax. I know what I did was foolish. I shouldn't have run away in a situation like this. We already had so much on our plate with the possible attack and I had to go and get everyone in more trouble.
“Are you going to reject me?” Ajax's voice brought me back from my thoughts.
“I don't want to reject you Ajax but in no way in the hell can I be with Zeno. Besides he might be the one that will reject me.”
I relaxed on the bed and curled up around him. He is so warm. This feels so nice.
“I know this does not justify Zeno's actions but there is a reason he is acting that way. I don't think he even knows that.”
“What is it?" I asked confused.
“In the summer before three years, our mate died.” I gasped in shock. Then who am I to you? “Do you know what it feels like when your mate dies? It feels like someone has sucked your life out of you. You feel empty and a darkness starts to creep inside you. You become so desperate to get rid of it that you go to any lengths to feel happy again. That year we lost our other half and he must have felt the changes happen inside him but he was lucky that he found his second chance right after or he would have killed himself eventually. If alive, he would have been beyond repair. Human bodies can't sustain the effects of rejection. He must have felt the emptiness and darkness leave him when he would have been near you. I felt that too. The relief when I would be around you, I felt content. I put two and two together and I knew from then that you are our mate. I couldn't ask for more but Zeno kept ruining everything for us. We had already lost one mate but his actions will make us lose our second mate too.” Ajax spat. “Sometimes I wonder if her dying did her good. I mean Zeno is not a kind of person anyone would want to be with. I won't hold it against you Aria. I can understand if you want to reject us. You deserve to be happy. Zeno won't give you the life you deserve but please before getting to the rejection, give him just one chance. Not for him but for me. I know what I am saying is very selfish of me but please just one chance is all I am asking. Maybe he will come to his senses when he understands everything. I just want a chance to be with you. To be with my soul mate.”
“I can only try Ajax but I won't promise to put up with everything he throws at me. He has done so much damage to me when I was already suffering. He made it hard for me to heal. What you are telling me does make sense but what he did to me is in no way fair. He took it out on me when it wasn't even my fault. You said that this started the summer before we started high school but he has been bullying me since I started living with mom and dad. He simply hated me. It did get worse once we started high school. I don't think he ever had any good feelings towards me. He simply hated me since day one. I am sorry Ajax but Zeno would never want to be with me. I would have tried for you to forgive him but he will reject me on the spot. I am sure of that. We should just enjoy the moments we have left together. There is no chance for us being together after Zeno shifts.”
It is really breaking my heart to say this to Ajax but that's the truth. Why does this have to turn this way? Why can't I have a normal and easy life for once? Poor Ajax. He is stuck in the midst of this. He will be suffering the consequences of Zeno's actions and decisions. We both will be suffering because of that ungrateful person. I just hope, whoever Zeno chooses will be a good change in Ajax's life. Not having control over your life seems nerve wrecking. I couldn’t even fully grasp what he is going through. I just want him to be happy. Why does such a good wolf spirit have to be paired up with a crappy human like Zeno? I wonder how he will react when he finds out about him and me being mates. He will probably berate me and curse me to his heart's content. He will never choose me no matter what happens. It doesn’t matter if he hurts me. I just hope he becomes a good Alpha to the pack. The Alpha is an important component of the pack. The pack will crumble without a good leader. I will be happy if he steps up to his responsibility without being snotty even if it costs me heartbreak. I will cope with that. I will be gone soon anyways.
“I can understand.” Ajax said in a grim tone but I could feel the acceptance in his voice.
He will be a great mate. He is perfect. I just wish I was able to have him myself. We would have been so happy together but alas fate always has plans. It is always enigmatic and dances on its own tune. All we can do is accept what it throws at us and embrace it with whole heart.
I curled up closer to him. I buried my face in his warmth and closed my eyes. I could stay like this forever. Please god, don't take this away from us. Please stop the time and let us stay this way forever in each other's arms.