SWNOVELS Chapter Book Two - Ch.# 36
“Rae... What's happened?” he asked.
I opened my mouth to reply but the words wouldn't come out. My body was running on pure adrenaline for survival now and I was doing my best to push through the overwhelming urge to cave into my emotions.
“I... I'm...,” I fumbled.
My eyes were trying to water but I gritted my teeth against it.
I didn't want to fight Kieran... I didn't know if I could live myself if I were to see the look of hatred in his eyes. Anything but that.
“Rae?”
“I... Kieran, someth—."
But before I could finish speaking, I was suddenly cut off.
"RAVEN!" Allison's voice shrilly screamed.
And I cursed. She was here. Probably at the staircase looking for me.
This was game over.
Kieran frowned but turned around to investigate, walking towards my only available exit. One now manned by his insane little sister.
“Kieran! W-wait... don't..."
However, as I futilely trailed behind him, I was further stressed by seeing that Allison had recruited help. Help in the form of Daniel, the Beta heir.
"Hand yourself over, Raven,” Daniel said, stepping cautiously forward. “Let's not drag this out any longer than we have to.”
"What the hell is going on?” Kieran demanded.
“I'm sorry, man, but she’s been lying to you,” he said. “Allison said that she admitted to being one of them. Called herself by a name that belonged to The Council of the Silver Mist. She's a Knight. Rheyna Knight.”
But as Daniel enlightened him to the situation, it was Kieran's reaction that was the most unsettling. Or, lack of, to be precise.
Because there was no shock or surprise that crossed his features at all. Just... remaining completely silent as he held Daniel's gaze.
Almost as if...
Almost as if he knew.
"...Kieran?” I whispered. “Why aren't you..."
And his face then confirmed it, closing his eyes in guilt for a moment.
Everything made sense now. Why he kept our training sessions private, why I was never allowed to talk about my health problems publicly, why he'd said those words to me last night. They'd struck me as odd, but I'd had more important things to worry about at the time. But his phrasing had been weird.
“Honestly? If the biggest issue we ever have to face publicly is just crimes your father forced you to do, then I think we'll be fine."* That was what he had said. “Biggest issue’ being my past. Because he knew that my birth family would cause a reaction like this, far greater than any other uproar I could possibly create.
"How could you know? Let alone keep this from me? Why bring me here at all?”
“I had my suspicions after I found out about the silver suppressors,” he said. “You kept up with me during a fight whilst taking them, Rae. It meant you had to be from a powerful pack, one stronger than even Ashwood by a considerable margin. Of which, there was only one other in modern history. But... I thought you didn't remember anything about your birth family. I thought I could protect you.”
The betrayal stung me unlike anything I'd felt before. He'd known this entire time and kept it from me, knowing full well that this might happen one day. That it was information that could likely lead to my death.
And I felt myself sink deeper inside, the last shred of hope dying.
It seemed we'd both been keeping things from each other. Secrets that had dire consequences. Perhaps our relationship really was irreparable now.
“She lied and bewitched you, Kieran!” Allison chimed in. “She's a descendant of the Siren. Manipulation is in her blood.”
“She didn’t do anything, Allison!” Kieran snapped angrily. “She couldn't even shift before I brought her here. She didn't even know what werewolves were. She was an orphan of war, somehow surviving long enough to still be tortured by our pack despite her situation. Sterling was selling silver suppressors, Allison. Illegally.”
“She has you covering up her tracks, believing her fabrications,” she said. “Now I'm starting to wonder if Sterling's death was really as justified as you claimed. She probably had you kill him as well. Swaying your mind to do her bidding.”
“Allison. Stop and listen to what I'm trying to tell you. Raven isn't a devil like we were always told. She's just a girl, an innocen—.".
"—I killed Sterling,” I said quietly, my voice cutting through the room. “It wasn't Kieran... it was me. I killed him."
"Rael"
“No, she’s right,” I said. “Whether it's because I'm a so-called “Devil’ or due to my past crimes, I'm no innocent, Kieran. Pick a title; Rogue or Devil. Because the same meaning still applies. I don't belong here. I never did. There is nothing I can do to suddenly change who I am.”
I'd given up and was feeling... exhausted. Exhausted of pretending to be someone I wasn't... and exhausted of now defending myself against something I couldn't change. My body felt numb to everything as the truth was unravelled.
I was done.
Allison cried out over hearing my confession, tears starting to fall down her face.
“Listen to her, Kieran! She is literally admitting that she’s evil. She—."
"Sterling assaulted her,” he interrupted. “Stalked her to her room and tried to force his mark on her. If she hadn't of killed him, I would have. He overstepped a line and was trying to abandon Ashwood, breaking our rules in the process. He was a bad person, Allison.”
Though I interjected before she could reply.
“Right... but if you check the coroner report, you'll find that his finger joints were repeatedly broken prior to his death,” I added. “I tortured him before I finished the job. Because that's what he was. What you were too. A job, Kieran. You really think I was allowed to come here of my own volition? With a man like my father? My leash has only ever been long enough to serve his interests.” “What...?"
And, finally, Kieran looked surprised.
"You were an assignment, Kieran,” I said, swallowing back my emotions. “You always were, even from the very beginning when we first met. I was sent to retrieve documents once in possession of a smuggler I'd killed, believed to be handed over to Victor Lycroft. Documents that I then discovered Sterling knew the whereabouts of. After he attacked me, I turned the tables on him and tortured him into admission. This shouldn't be a shock. I already told you that I'm not who I seem. I'm... not a good person.”
"Rae—."
“Raven,” I corrected. “...Rae is a lie. She doesn't exist.”
His jaw tensed as he looked at me, making me want to take it all back. But even if it hurt, these were the facts.
“That's not true,” he said. “You wanted to stay here with me, I know it. I saw it in your face every day we were together. I promised to protect you, and I still intend to do that. You're still my—."
But his complete denial at letting me push him away was only making this harder. Too hard to deal with... and I suddenly cracked.
A bubble of frustration and sadness surfaced all at once, a cumulation of both the revelations today and the confliction from last night.
"—YOU CAN'T FIX ME, KIERAN," I snapped. “I can't change my birth family nor change my past. This isn't something you can mend like my poisoning or shifting. Stop trying to always fix me.”
"...Stop trying to always be such a kind and genuinely good person, believing the best still exists inside me,’ I added in my head. “Because it's not there. It never will be.’
However, nearby, Daniel stirred as I finally raised my voice in anger. It must have made him uncomfortable, unsure probably if I were about to perform some other devil magic. Whatever the hell that even was.
He took two steps towards me, taking an aggressive stance to suggest a fight, and I sighed. I was letting my emotions seep in again, something that was a snowball that would probably end badly. Right now, me leaving as soon as possible was the best-case scenario.
The only problem now was... how.
Because Daniel and Allison were still guarding the stairs, yet we were too many floors up for me to safely utilise a window escape. I was trapped unless I intended to fight my way out. Something that I wanted to avoid where possible.
“We need to take her to your father, Kieran,” Daniel said. “Let him decide what to do with her.”
But Kieran wasn't having that. He looked... pissed. Probably rightfully so given the circumstances. “Touch her and I swear to the Goddess, Daniel...” Kieran warned.
“You'll what? You really want to defend her? A child of the monsters who killed your mother? Our other pack members? So many died in that war because of them.”
"What about Rae's mother? Huh? Her father? Siblings?” he argued. “Because her entire family is dead because of us. Did you think about that?”
~I hadn't.
He was right. This went both ways. Everything had been moving too quickly for me to think about it before but... but if it weren't for Ashwood, perhaps I would have grown up normally. I might have known what it was like to have a real family.
“There were no winners in that war,” he continued. “Just people who lost those they loved. All for myths, fairy tales and speculations. For traditions that are probably more outdated than those exact stories.”
"You mean “what about the other spawn we rightfully vanquished?” Allison spat. “Listen to yourself, brother. You've bedded a devil and now want to protect it. But it's okay, I don't blame you. You just need help undoing what she did to you. Step aside and we'll get you that help. You can find salvation with the Goddess.”
And it was then that Daniel stepped closer again, his eyes watching me like a hawk.
Well... if we were on the topic of me apparently being evil, then I suppose there was no added harm in doing what I had to.
"...I'm sorry, Kieran,” I said quietly.
..And I matched Daniel's step forward, equipping the dagger in my good hand.
If I understood the hierarchy correctly then, so long as Kieran didn't join the fight, I should be able to take on Daniel easily by himself. I'd just need to stay focused, mind my injury, and, most importantly, cast aside any hope of leaving here amicably. Because the only way I saw myself getting out of here now was if I didn't hold myself back anymore.
“Rae... don't,” Kieran said, probably realising I would win.
But I was already moving forward now, sizing up Daniel like a snake about to strike.
"Rae."
They wanted a devil.
..I would give them one.
And as Daniel and I moved, readying to attack, I saw as he then tried to make the first move. Bold of him to do so... and exactly what I was hoping for.
He brought his hand towards me quickly, and though it was faster than expected, it was still far too slow to be of concern to me. I moved out of the way effortlessly and used his momentum to grab his wrist, forcing him into a submissive position instantly as the dagger went to his throat.
He struggled against my hold, able to loosen my hand for merely a second, but I simply proceeded to kick his leg back out to checkmate him once more. All I had to do now was finish the job.
.Just a little more pressure into his neck and I'd be free.
..Yep... Just... just a little bit more. One sharp slice.
Okay, Raven. Now. I really needed to do this now.
But it was as if my hand was frozen.
Frozen like an invisible barrier was stopping me... just like that time Id tried to kill Noah Kennedy.
Back when I'd heard that voice in my head. What had it said again?
Something like—.
"—You don't have to do this...” Kieran said behind me. “You don’t need to be Raven.”
And I spun my head around so quickly that I momentarily forgot what was happening.
"...What did you just say to me?” I whispered in shock.
Because as he spoke the exact same words, suddenly, it was as if the walls began to move, a nauseating headache hitting me unlike anything I'd experienced in weeks.
..A moment which Daniel swiftly took advantage of as he pushed me to the ground, disarming my dagger for himself.
"Give it up, Devil,” he said.
And suddenly my vision was filled with only the flash of silver metal as it came crashing down towards me.